How To Become a Christian Fundamentalist!

Turn or Burn.....a.k.a....Get Right or Get Left!

Are you wandering in the forest of today's religious views and the webs spun by slick, manipulative "preachers" so called? Are you tired of feeling "loose" and "worldly"? Then maybe you too are one of us....the "called"....the "chosen".....and we are known as Christian Fundamentalists!

What is a Christian Fundamentalist?

A Christian Fundamentalist is a Christian (unless they are a hypocrite...more later) who lives and believes the "fundamental" truths of classic Christianity! Perceived by many today as being intolerant and dogmatic....CF's are merely "living by what's right"!

If You are a Christian Fundamentalist...then you believe that this is absolutely TRUE and is the very Word of God....if it's the King James Authorized Version of 1611! (All  the modern versions are tools of Satan!)
If You are a Christian Fundamentalist...then you believe that this is absolutely TRUE and is the very Word of God....if it's the King James Authorized Version of 1611! (All the modern versions are tools of Satan!)

A Typical Christian Fundamentalist Preacher!

What are the "Fundamentals" of the Fundamentalists?

What...some may ask...do CF's believe?

1. The Bible...both Testaments....and usually the King James Version....is the literal WORD of GOD! It is not mythic. It means what it says and it says what it means! It has no mistakes! It is perfect....unless it is one of those modern "perversions" like the NIV (New International Version) or the NLT (New Living Translation) or anything but the "King James" Authorized 1611 Bible!

2. Jesus of Nazareth is the Son of God and was literally born of a VIRGIN!

3. There is a literal actual Devil....called Satan....and he is responsible for everything sinful and evil and ungodly and worldly!

4. You are either "saved" and headed for a literal Heaven...or you are "lost" and are headed for a literal burning Hell!

Christian Fundamentalism Can Be Funny! (Ray Stevens)

Christian Fundamentalism Can Be SCARY!

Christian Fundamentalism can be INSANE!

Steps to Becoming a Christian Fundamentalist!

1. Get "Right" with God - This means accepting His Only begotten Son Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior....repenting of your sins and wrongdoing and giving your life to Him!

2.Get a copy of the Word of God and read it everyday - This means the Authorized "King James" version of the Holy Scriptures -all those modern "perversions" are just Satan's attempt to ruin souls and evil men's plots to make money off religion!

3. Find yourself a good, KJV Bible believing preaching church and join it!

When you follow these steps you are well on your way to escaping the snares of this world and Satan!

More by this Author


Comments 4 comments

t.keeley profile image

t.keeley 8 years ago from Seattle, WA

Best post I've ever read. Thanks for writing it. It voices the massive frustration I and many others have with the fundmentalist movement.


Wow 4 years ago

Can't tell if this is satirical or serious...


vicseay profile image

vicseay 4 years ago from Dalton Georgia Author

a bit of both. I used to be a "Fundie" and what I posted is accurate as to beliefs.


Efficient Admin profile image

Efficient Admin 3 years ago from Charlotte, NC

Thank you Lord that I am a Christian Fundamentalist!

Except I read other translations as well as the KJV and I am not a fan of Jack Hyles. I really enjoyed that preacher in the last video.

Nobody has ever told me to my face I'm intolerant and dogmatic.

But people at work got mad at me for saying I hate Helloween and don't celebrate it because it represents the occult and it's the devil's holiday.

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working