Just One Of Those Days~Trusting
Today is one of those days when I hoped earthly answers would come my way. Some type of solid plan or path to knowing the direction I'm to take. I want to desperately purge, yet to do so, would take from the meaning and understanding I have once again come to adhere to. That basically God's timing is not mine, and as much as I would like to figure things out ahead of time, I must surrender and calmly wait.
Have you ever experienced a season in life where waiting has become tedious, to say the least? Well of course you have. You're human and experiencing God's timing, that can be a very human experience. Now with other things like material wants and wishes a waiting period can be, but a splinter in your finger easily taken care of with tweezers. As such, the wait is short-lived and before you know it you have earned a favorite item on your wish list. I suppose the anxiousness in itself is a wrongful act as God asks us to be patient. Perhaps in times of waiting for things such as this we are humbled by the true meaning of needs versus wants.
I'm not saying that God doesn't want for us to have things that bring us joy, just that He wants us to be mindful that He gives and takes away. He wants all things to be used for His plan. Depending on the day or hour, in our walk, He will decide the timing of reward and of provision. We must be patient and trust in His Grace. He will also decide the timing of our experiences for growth allowing them to be used for His purpose. Sadly we always seem to want to edge His decision often making it our own as opposed to His.
I have experienced many of these moments of wishes and wants and often I am able to let them go and focus primarily on needs. Sadly in my human nature, I too am attracted to the constant "SNAP" of a greedy and wanting the world. I have often succumbed to my desires for things and even my desire for how I want life to be, rather than to paying attention to the call of God's plan. I forget at times to really take inventory of what things are truly my wants or desires and what are most assuredly desires God has for me. I have even felt the pangs of guilt as I appreciate the overly indulgent, whatever it might be, and then am so very aware when I visually see the pains of the world around me. One needs to merely drive the streets of any city or community to see the serious trials and tribulations of so many. These needs are not only for the desire of things, but rather the needs of basic human existence due to the lack of nurturing guidance in our communities. Everybody hurts, we just might not see them bleed, and I forget this. we all forget this, sometimes.
We're all in the ebb and flow of life, tides shifting high and low, we remain in God's grace through the storms that rage, fog may impede our judgement trust faltering hardly noticing as it dissipates, forgetting He always makes a way when there is no other.
This type of observance is necessary. We must open our eyes to the basic necessities, bringing others into the fold and welcoming them with the love, always assuring them they're never alone. If I pay attention I can see countless ways that God wants me to use my time in between the tough times in my life. Even in times of personal crisis, God wants me to be external in my adherence to His grace. He wants for me to trust Him in all things keeping my focus on others and not self. Sometimes this is easier said than done when living in the flesh.
God provides calm in our storms and speaks directly through His Holy Spirit. He may want for me to stop in that very moment and give care to those around me. Often I find those who are not even aware of His existence or they are losing that grip. Sadly in their desperate state, they don't really care. God doesn't allow the visions of the needs of others to leave simply by the closing of our eyes to them. Usually, when I listen to these cries of the Holy Spirit, I am directed to God's plan. There by His grace I ultimately find great solace in these moments. He may guide me to someone in pain, someone lost, someone hurting much more than myself. He may have wanted me to listen and be quiet, to be funny in times of sadness, to heal the wounds of a spirit broken or to just sit and quietly pray with someone or by myself. He wants me to Hear Him rather than ignore His call.
Then there are the things in life that are out of our control. These we have greater difficulty wrapping our head around. The ones we do our best to set some type of lifeline allowing us to hang on. It may be a date in the near distant future. A timeline created in our mind when we say, "I can do it until then, but after that I give up." The "I can't take one more thing moment."
Funny I think I'm so faithful and prayerful and yet in my most challenging moments, I too can place limits on God. I can honestly tell others not to do this. I may say, “Be strong in the Lord and never give up Hope.” Quoting from the word itself. Now I must again admit my human nature. When the things in my path are more life changing and difficult it's more difficult to not pay attention to the "SNAP" they are causing. I have a hard time noticing the small splinter of little things that has developed into a large plank right in the center of my eye. I try so very hard to remain faithful and recognize my lack of attention to His word, yet when we are under attack we're not our best selves. Often we attack anything we can, so as to gain some form of balance. This is very futile and usually hurtful for we seek those closest to us to unload our pain, as do they. We do this, as we trust they will allow it, as does our Father in heaven, and through His love we will then process our honest pain and He will again provide the answers. We must remember in these times to love each other as Christ loves us unconditionally and without malice. We must also forgive our lack of poise in our reactionary humanness. This is why we welcome the day when we will be perfect and glorified in Him. Then and only then will we get it right! Until then we must strive to be more like Him and help one another in our weaknesses and build up one another on our strengths for Him.
I find it funny how in our righteousness we assume we will not stumble. During these times, we may find ourselves crossing the boundaries of forgiveness, patience, humility, and joy and jumping right into crazy, acting like a fool, and fearful in hopelessness. In these times, I am limiting God. Why do I waste my time there in this human reaction when I know the only way my hope can be restored is in Him and surrender to His plan?
I know this and I do this. I have surrendered faithfully many times and I have followed Christ with great Joy, but even the most faithful of servants will be shaken and I am by no means close to the most faithful. If I were I would not stumble and would not question the desires of God’s will. I would not decide the plan or even the timeline, but rather pray for the wants of my Father in Heaven. I would fully trust and be confident in Him undoubtedly strengthened in His promises. I would pray in silence for a better understanding and welcome this time with Him. I would then in this quiet submission receive the answers for another day. The answers come when I turn away from my humanness and give it up to God.
We all fall into this plight at times, the fact of relying on earthly answers as opposed to Godly ones. I believe it's easier for us to guide others when we are not pushed against a wall with water gradually spilling over our heads, feeling as if we will be swallowed up by this wave of doubt, however, this is the exact time we should reach out to the plight of someone other than ourselves, as it is healing in itself to do His works. This is when Christians become the lifeline on earth for each other. We do not judge but rather link together to make a raft and keep afloat heading toward the way the truth and the light. It's important to allow our light for Christ to shine daily so we can find one another in the storms of life.
I will be tested, I will be attacked, we all will, but ultimately I will not slip too far from my precious God and Father. He has gripped my heart and I know He is my redeemer. I may need a gentle pull to not grow weary, but I am always in awe of His Love for me.
When I woke up this morning I could not help but think of how I was supposed to be doing something completely different, or so I thought. I had pensively awaited this day and my preset agenda. There are days the proverbial rug is pulled right out from under me as a change of plans or circumstance sends me whirling for a bit. I can't help but think this is a test of my faith and I admit I am sometimes afraid of failing at first. After some useless wasting of time, I do what I always do, I go to my Father and pray. Please help me understand why I must wait, please give me patience and understanding for the path you want me to take a moment by moment. Please dear God, help me to trust fully and completely in your plan and will.
As one day starts I may be aware of an event that is to occur, but as a day comes to a close I am often humbled. Our God is an awesome God and He plans our moments so much more beautifully than we could ever imagine.I have limits as do we all, limits that battle and rage against me. To be idle was not in my vocabulary, but often it is this idleness that provides time for my attention to His purpose for my day. I often wish the battle was won and that I was sitting in the presence of my King, but again I must be His servant and await His timing. God uses every day and I need to remember that while I'm waiting.
I sit here recalling one particular day of botched up plans where the new amazing plan of God was underway. I decided to go hiking one day with my lovely sweet girl and a dear friend. We went to a nearby trail and yes we climbed a mountain together. It was not the largest mountain and in its entirety, it was about 1.9 miles. I seriously considered waiting it out on a park bench as they would climb, but I believe God prompted me to go along. It was a tough climb for me. I have not tempted to do such a feat in many years and in all actuality I am somewhat crazy for doing it today as I am currently ordered to rest, often, as my physical health is a bit challenged. My spiritual health is in fairly good shape, though, so I thought, not today, today I throw caution to the wind and trust in God. This day was so gorgeous and the spring air was summoning my spirit to feel the warmth of the sun giving me a fiery confidence.
Every few minutes that passed I could see my daughter as she bubbled with excitement. We were doing this climb together. I could not help but think of all the times I have told her “through God all things are possible.” I witnessed the joy as she realized we were going to go the entire way together. Our friend was slightly ahead of us encouraging our goal. We laughed, giggled and found new energy as a little snake crossed our path making us jump almost out of our skin. A poignant reminder of the enemy attempting to trip us up. The closer we came to the completion of the trail the more thankful I became for the Grace God Gives us in a storm. Then the pearl came, the one I would have missed had my plans not have changed. My girl, at the time, seventeen and ready to take flight on her own adventure and path directed by God, Looked at me and said, “ This is the first time we ever completed a hike together, as you have been sick since I was eight years old.” She reached for my hand as she helped me at times pushing me up and over a tree root and then gently assisting me down the steep terrain. At this moment, God gave me His pure love as He allowed me to see this changing of roles. So many years before she placed her tiny hand in mine and I helped her along her way. Today as I know she is about to head out on her own she placed her hand in mine and said, “ I will help you, you will be so proud of yourself, and you can do it.” Thank you, God, for this beautiful day. I was never so happy to see a parking lot in the near distance, but that moment on that little mountain was worth every ounce of pain that may have followed. I was so grateful my plans had been changed, if they had not, this memory would never have happened. God has His hand out for all of us to hold all we need to do is place our hand in His and walk along His path together.
I am in awe of the life lessons as they are orchestrated by our Father in heaven. Each and every day is a time to be used. to grow, to learn, to be more for Him and better than the day before. We will all mess up, no worries it's okay, just keep looking to Him, and every once in a while look back so you can see how far you have come. thank Him for the tough days, thank Him for the beautiful days, thank Him for the days you goofed up, thank Him for really bad days and thank Him for allowing you breath to serve Him one more day before He calls you home.
Today was one of those days when earthly answers were to come my way ~ Silly me tricks are for kids ~ All my answers are in Christ my Lord for whom all HOPE is found.
For God alone, O my soul waits in silence, for my hope is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.
~ Peace in your stages ~
Fee ~ Hands of the Healer
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7
© 2012 The Stages Of ME
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