Loyalty is a Key to Success

Loyalty By Example

Since I was a little kid, loyalty has been hammered into my head. Through life, I have given my loyalty to many people, ideas, and projects, some deserved it and some did not. I am just now realizing loyalty needs to be returned, if only in a small way.

You know the saying that it takes two to make a relationship work? I haven’t always “gotten” that concept. For example, with my best friend, I have been the one who has done most of the calling, writing, or visiting while she does very little except for the moment. I have no doubt she loves me, but I am the worker bee. When we are together, we laugh, talk, and have a wonderful time.

One day something snapped in my heart, and I needed to tell her I felt like our relationship was only in existence because of my work. I was terrified as to what her response would be. Surprisingly, she admitted I was right. For a while, she was much better, but it eventually trickled down because life has a way of interfering but this time it was because both of our lives had commitments and demands that neither of us could drop. The mutual understanding with her is so refreshing and has made us even closer.





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Faith and Loyalty

I have also spent much time giving my loyalty to an idea. Faith and loyalty have always gone hand-in-hand. One cannot be faithful to something or someone where there is no loyalty involved. My faith in God and His Word have gotten me through many rough spots in life and have taken me to soaring heights that otherwise would not have been possible without Him. He has always been faithful to me, and sometimes I did not deserve it. There have been times I did not see His purpose, but He never fails to be loyal to me when my faith is waning. He continually works to maintain our relationship,

Because of my strong beliefs in loyalty, even the minor issues in life are given attention. I find it hard not to finish a book, even if I don’t like it. I believe there is value in everything we do and something to be gained. As a wife, mom, and teacher, I have been faced with many difficult projects and without my deep-seated loyalty, I would have quit when it became too hard.

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Loyalty During Trying Times

Helping other women with problems while our husbands, sons, and daughters were deployed to Iraq was a difficult task. Even though there were times when I needed a shoulder and did not get one, I stuck it out for the sake of those women who were having a hard time and did not vent my complaints or needs. What worth would there have been in remaining loyal to my husband by acting on his behalf if I had fallen into every negative situation that arose out of that time? What would those women have gained if I had not shown them loyalty by “always being there” for them? My loyalty to the women who were in the same boat helped me more than having a shoulder to cry on.

Teaching Loyalty

Helping my children as they grow and try to make right decisions is a difficult job, too, because they do not always want my advice or think they need me, if anyone can imagine THAT! Working through the pain of a child’s rejection is difficult, but being older and “wiser” helps me keep perspective even if my feelings do get hurt. Being their loyal supporter through times of defeat and times of triumph has hopefully shown them an example of loyalty, which is one of the greatest gifts I can give them. It also shows them that there are ups and downs in life, but loyalty to one’s self to keep going will help get you through.

This attitude of unconditional love and loyalty spills over into my profession as a teacher. So many times it would have been easier to throw my hands up and forget it, but I love my students and see their worth in their diversities. Planning for classes, encouraging a kid who doesn’t like to read or do homework, or showing a disrespectful student respect in a time when I would rather shake the student has been hard, but remembering my purpose and that I am the adult gets me through.

In these cases and others in life, I think of the saying, “Give respect, get respect,” which brings me to what my mother taught me from my first memories, the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” These sayings and truths play a major part in being loyal to others and to seeing things through to the end, no matter what the end may bring.

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Comments 30 comments

Deborah Brooks profile image

Deborah Brooks 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

This is an awesome hub. I am so glad I found it.. I agree give respect to get respect. there are times in our lives that we seem to bed the strong one for other people when we need to cry on someone's else s shoulder. even with best friends. some people are very affectionate and some are not. it's how they have been raised I found out the hard way.

I voted up across the board

Debbie


ThoughtSandwiches profile image

ThoughtSandwiches 4 years ago from Reno, Nevada

Susan...

An excellent look at the need we ALL have for loyalty. I understand what you mean...I'm reasonably sure the author won't know I didn't finish his crappy book...still...I push on in hope of some redemption...

Your commitment to loyalty obviously makes it easy to share your sphere on Earth!

Thanks,

Thomas


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 4 years ago from USA or America

An interesting article Sholland on loyalty. That's about I'm going to say on it. I do appreciate you sharing your thoughts on the subject matter, as well as, your thoughts on other things you've connected to inside your article.


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 4 years ago from Hemet, Ca

In life there always seems to be a give/take thing going on... for any relationship to be successful, the give/take needs to be on even keels otherwise someone will start feeling resentment.

This is a great hub. I can really relate to the part with the friendships. I have at times found that I was the "worker bee" while other times I was always expecting my friends to be the ones pulling me along. Sadly, both situations can be problamatic and cause relationships to crumble. Awesome hub and thanks for sharing!


Daisy Mariposa profile image

Daisy Mariposa 4 years ago from Orange County (Southern California)

Beautifully stated, Susan. Loyalty is something to be highly valued.

Thanks for publishing this article.


mythicalstorm273 profile image

mythicalstorm273 4 years ago

I am also a very loyal person and I never understood how somebody could step back and not be when they were involved with something. Although this has always been a very important part of my values, I never really thought about it this way... You make some excellent points and really made me think about why I am loyal and why it is so important to me. Great job :-)


Ardie profile image

Ardie 4 years ago from Neverland

Loyalty is a grand idea. I tend to be OCD and loyal to a fault. Once someone earns my love, admiration and loyalty I give it over and over until its proven to be a mistake. But it is nice to get that loyalty and faith back from those you put it into :) Beautiful Hub sholland!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Debbie, it sounds like you and I have had to learn the hard way with loyalty. It doesn't make us less loyal, but we become wiser (I hope...) as far as deciding what is important.

Thanks for the votes and for being the first person to comment!! :-) YAY!!


Sally's Trove profile image

Sally's Trove 4 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

Your words touched my heart, because I have been to my best friend as your reserved friend has been to you. Through the years, my friend has been the one to keep in touch. Like you, she one day "called" me on my lack of initiating contact with her. Since then, I do reach out to her more, but probably never will the way she reaches out to me. We are just two very different people, but closer now than we've ever been since we were children and glued to each other.

Yours is a strong and important message, one we all can benefit by: loyalty to family, friends, principles, and beliefs is the key to success. Voted up and beautiful.


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Thomas, I have always been taught to finish what I start. It is just part of my make up and drives me crazy if I do not go to the very, sometimes painful, end.

Thanks for commenting!! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Thank you, Cagsil. I appreciate you reading and commenting. :-)


BRIAN SLATER profile image

BRIAN SLATER 4 years ago from Nottingham Uk

Glad you wrote this, I have always been a very loyal person to my friends. Once you have gained that loyalty I will go to great lenghts to try and keep it. I agree it does have to be reciprocated otherwise you can find yourself doing all the running and getting very little in return. Finally I like your moms saying, if we all took that on board the world would be a much better place. Voted up and dugg.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

...loyalty I would imagine is a two way street in a perfect and harmonious world .....and comes in all shapes and sizes (both people and pets) .....thank you for your profound and soulful words here - it speaks as much of the writer herself as it does the subject itself.

lake erie time ontario canada 12:35pm sending you warm wishes and good energy from a supremely sunny day

and the sun will also shine for you with a posting of your piece here and my loyalty to you on my Facebook page


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Thanks, BarberGirl! Sounds like we have had some similar situations. Sometimes our loyalty causes hurt feelings because we expect the same level of loyalty from others. Other times, we get busy and don't see we are the ones not following through for someone.

Thanks for dropping by!! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Thanks, Daisy! Loyalty should be highly valued. If we were kinder to one another (speaking in general), we would have a better support system of loyal friends, which can only lift us up.

Thanks for dropping by!! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

MysticalStorm, I do not understand why people step back when needed either. I, too, have had to reevaluate my position. For my peace of mind, I either have had to speak up or let go.

Thanks for commenting!! :-)


American View profile image

American View 4 years ago from Plano, Texas

Susan,

I live by three things, Honor, Loyalty, Honesty. We try to teach our kids these things but I found it was easier to just show them by living it everyday. Now they are the same way. Great Hub Up and Awesome


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Hey girl - I loved this hub. I totally agree and I have had relationships where I feel like I am the one that is the glue but I think I am just the more social cog wheel in the big picture:) lol Even when we were like 10 I was that way:))) Loyalty has kept us BFF's for like 35 years now!

Loyality is huge in my book and I think this is fabulous just like you!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Ardie, I know exactly what you mean!! Loyalty to a fault. It is a great feeling to have it returned. :-)

Thanks for commenting!!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Sally, I understand what you are saying. For instance, I have friends who are wonderful about calling and sending cards. I am TERRIBLE about those things. It doesn't mean I care for them less; it is just not a priority. I have friends who give me Thank You notes for Christmas and birthday gifts. I give hugs and personal thank yous, but no cards.

Thanks for commenting!! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Brian, with 8 kids, my mother had to say the Golden Rule at least three times a day. It kept us from killing each other. LOL She is my source for learning loyalty. She, too, was loyal to a fault and turned a blind eye to those who did not deserve her loyalty. She also kept peace in our big family by being so loyal to us.

Thanks for commenting! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Epi, so wonderful to see your comment. You are so loving and loyal to others, and I want to tell you I appreciate that. You are right about animals, too. What would we do without the loyalty of our pets? Probably fall into a black existence. Pets are ALWAYS there for us to make us smile or feel good.

Thank you so much for dropping by!!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

AV, I agree completely. Our children emulate what they see us doing, so we must give them a good, strong moral compass. Loyalty is one of the things at the top of my list!

Thanks for the votes and commenting!!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Kelly, I would say my friend and I are both very social, and now things are wonderful because we both work at the relationship. We have been friends since school, too. I was more of her follower back then. LOL She has always loved me, though. Now we love and need each other equally, and it is wonderful.

Thanks so much for dropping by and commenting!! :-)


thougtforce profile image

thougtforce 4 years ago from Sweden

Very good article and you described the different types of people very well. I am afraid I am like your friend! Not because I don't want to spend time with my friends because I enjoy it very much, but maybe some of us need it less and some more! My closest friend is just like me, and non of us gets upset if the other doesn't call or so! As you can imagine it can sometimes be long time between the times we meet, but we have been very close friends for more than 30 years and we know we are there for each other if we need help. And we have a very good time when we meet, we just pick up where we left:)

Very interesting article and I can understand how it can feel for others. I love your message about being loyal to others and give respect! It is important to be open and honest to people around us! Voted up, interesting and more

Tina


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 4 years ago from California

Loyalty can be so difficult--and I am not sure that society values it much--but I don't know how relationships can function without it--such a thought-provoking write! Thank you!


alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

I absolutely agree. You really know who your friends are when the going gets tough. Voting this Up and Interesting.


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Tina, I don't think that is not being loyal because you have an understanding. My best friend and I now have the same understanding. It works! I am glad I held on for as long as I did because I can't imagine not having her to talk to when I need her or vice versa. I am glad it works for you, too. :-)

Thanks for the comment and the votes!!


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Audrey,I agree. I am such a PollyAnna, and I am so shocked to see others undercut each other. You cannot watch the news or a television show without someone being malicious. I guess being too loyal is better than not understanding loyalty.

Thanks so much for dropping by! :-)


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri Author

Alcosin, you are absolutely right. I will say that my loyalty with my friend has paid off 10-fold. She and I are so close now. My mother also taught me what to do when I fall down or get pushed down: Pick yourself up, wipe yourself off, and keep going. She was a real survivor. I am glad she passed her feelings of loyalty onto me. I just hope I know when to jump before a ship sinks. LOL

Always happy to see your comments!! Thanks for dropping by and voting! :-)

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