Nothing is What you Thought it was

Throughout my life I was raised as a Christian; a believer and follower of God. As far back as I can remember I was always drawn to the image or idea of God, Jesus, the Bible, and church. I can't actually explain why, but I recall always feeling well assured of my future or life. Perhaps it was because everyone would always say "Put your faith in God and he will handle everything" or something along those lines. So, in effect, I did! However, as I grew older and certain life crisis's arisd, I began to wonder... "Does God truly exist?”

This is where the big spin in my life took place, and still is today. My mind went up, down, left, right, and in all possible directions looking for a possible answer. All of my sources, all of my advisors have told me just this "It is nothing but a theory", and then it clicked. No one, in the history of mankind could ever produce physical, fact proof evidence that God and all his mercies ever existed. The idea that my heavenly father was nothing but a mere lie all along, was haunting, terrifying, and most of all depressing. Yet, this is what I found:

Each religion I have heard of or read on makes some logical sense. However, in the sense that they all have good intentions; they all speak of being better people, helping one another, living a sinless life while worshiping and serving a higher being (God). They all speak on loving one another, forgiving, accepting, and obeying. The three major western religions, which are Judaism, Christianity, and Islam... all of these people, believe in the same God or the same creator. You must be asking yourself "What does this have to do with your point?” Well, if these religions are so similar and have the same basic beliefs, then why can't everyone else see these similarities and thus end all major conflicts between nations? I'll tell you why, because each verse that is read in any bible is read by a different person with different backgrounds, morals, ideals, and what not. They all interrupt the bible in their own way. Thus, they also teach the bible in their own way. So, for centuries now mankind has been taught the teachings of God in a hundred different ways, and they also have taken each lesson in their own way. My point is that, how can we trust what the bible say's if it was indeed written by man, taught by man, and passed down by man? We can all agree that mankind is the source of all evil, the cause of all wars, murders, rapes, conspiracy's, lies, and so much more... what on earth could or would convince any person who realizes this to believe the bible?

Now of course, there are people who will say "but there is physical evidence that God exists". Really? I have not heard on the news or read in any article that people have found a footprint by God, and can scientifically prove that it is his DNA, his skin molecules, his hair fibers, etc. Science has proven some interesting facts, that’s a given, but they haven’t been able to prove the actual existence of God, that he is indeed sitting up there in heaven watching us all. It can be proven that possibly ghosts or sprits are real, that perhaps we all do possess a soul and it leaves the body when we die, that certain formations of rocks can be made by water in a few years verses a million years. All of these are great break throughs, and maybe they answer some questions for some people, or give hope to others, but it still fails to prove the actual existence of God. People have a tendency to associate such findings such as ghosts, souls, prints of Jesus’ face as full proof evidence of God, but how exactly? Why do people attach meaning to something that we haven’t been able to fully explain or prove? Why do people immediately rule out any other explanations? How come when we read an article that contains a phrase starting "this evidence has been commonly associated with religious beliefs or spiritual beliefs" we automatically say "Yes! That must be it!"? Honestly, what has been the down fall of all people in the past, present, and possibly the future, is the lack of critical thinking. The kind of attitude mankind should have about the creation of all living things is "I don’t know", a humble statement and an open mind.

In the end I have come to realize that nothing is what I thought it was, and though it's heart breaking, frustrating, and is destroying everything I used to stand for, I must continue on. In other words, I can’t let this simple realization destroy my life. Though trust me, I am praying (irony) that I am wrong. I am just accepting these thoughts or ideas, and am open for others as well. I have been told that I should believe in whatever feels right to me, and I thought this through...why should I spend most or all of my life searching for something that feels "right", when it is nothing but a mere gamble of my soul? I even realized that believing in nothing is a gamble of my soul...either way I'm going somewhere, and all I can do in the mean time is live.