Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll...my life before Jesus

Filling the void

Sex drugs and rock and roll....from whom and when did that phrase originate? Maybe it was the 60's, 70's, I'm not really sure. One thing I do know is it became my personal motto during the mid 80's.

Looking back on my life, I ponder how I developed into such a rebel. Perhaps I was born that way.... My earliest recollection of an emerging 'wild child' was around the age of 5. At an early age, I was already sexually curious and experimenting. In the sixth grade at age 11, I smoked my first Marlboro cigarette. In the eighth grade my first marijuana. It was easy to help myself to to beer, wine and liqueurs since alcohol was constantly present in my home growing up, w/ my parents being what they referred to as "social drinkers." When I reached the age of 16, the phrase, "sweet 16, never been kissed" didn't come close to applying to me.

My dad and step mom taught me about honesty, manners, hard work, responsibility, to be respectful of others. As a child, I often feared expressing my true feelings to them since I saw them as strict and controlling. I began feeling very sad, empty and helpless. I often wondered about God and if he existed and sometimes I'd pray my life would get better since I seemed to be struggling so much. I wanted to be happy, to be comfortable with who I was instead of trying to be someone I was not. I longed to be popular and to fit in. I didn't have a healthy relationship w/ my step mom so I decided a change was necessary. In February of 1984, I left Washington and headed to Northern California to live w/ my mom and step dad.

I finished high school at Petaluma High but my partying increased. With this new set of parents, I was provided more freedom. Due to the nature of the drugs on my party scene, I was often out til dawn of the next morning. I'd graduated high school already but I'd only been 18 for 2mos when my mom said to me, "I love you and I'll miss you but I won't miss worrying about you - you have 30 days to find yourself a new place to live." A classic example of 'tough love.'

So I moved into a 4 bedroom party house and I rented a room. I lived there and continued to live as though invincible for several months. I was working as a waitress at a Mexican restaurant and making good money from tips. A 'recovering' heroin addict lived across the street and did auto re-upholstery. He also supplied crystal meth. I and one of my room mates were with him along w/two other people one night when one of the guys decided to pull a gun on us. I came really close to being the recipient of a bullet.

The next place I lived was in a 5 bedroom home w/ 3 - 4 men, all older than me, in their 30's. I say 3 -4 because three out of four were "comrades" having a similar language and culture being Russian, Ukrainian, Czechoslovakian (Antonin or "Tony," the Czech guy, often crashed there). Bogdan or "Bogie" was the homeowner and he worked as a long distance truck driver. They knew how to party and being 19 years old, I wanted to keep up w/ them. We were often up til wee hours of the morning, toasting 'nos da rovia' (sp?) w/ shot glasses full of chilled Vodka . One night I drove Bogie to the store for cigarettes, under the influence of course, and this time I totalled my 67 Mustang and went to jail (in my bathrobe!) for DUI.

It was between age 19 and 20 that the promiscuous nature of my character for the most part was put to rest. My choices in men however, still left a lot to be desired. I wanted someone to appreciate me, a man w/ a sincere heart who would commit to me and provide security, all of us have that need to feel loved. So I began to see Bogie in a different light, wondering if I could find all that in a man 17 years my senior. Bogie had a good heart but was an insecure man, not wanting me to have a social life outside of work, my mother and his friends for fear of my meeting someone else. I often accompanied him when he worked hauling airline freight up and down Calif. When he wasn't working, for recreation he wanted to drink, watch movies, sports, pornography. Sometimes we'd go for drives out to the coast. Porn led me to believe sex equaled power but it also made me feel insecure and inadequate.

There were a couple other dysfunctional relationships after that one. About a year after Bogie, I entered into a relationship w/ another older man, this time 12 years my senior. His name was Lon and he wanted me to move w/ him to Hawaii. So in 1989, a couple weeks after my 22nd birthday, we were on our way to paradise - that being the only positive result of our union. He'd warned me about his alcoholism and I just laughed and said I too was an alcoholic. After being on the Big Island and living w/ him there awhile, the disease reared it's dark, ugly head. He began attending AA meetings and I quit drinking for 9 months in support of him and to prove to myself that I could. He stayed sober for less time than I. During the 1 1/2 years together, in addition to his inability to stay sober, he lacked financial responsibility. He'd been physically abusive a couple times (there were a couple times Bogie had as well) and it wasn't long before I gave up hope for us and kicked him out.

A month or so after Lon, I started seeing a local Japanese guy, this time the age difference being 10 years older. Les was sweet, gentle and humble and he taught me a lot about Hawaiiana and local culture. He however used cocaine and we weren't together long when I decided I wanted to close that chapter of my life for good (although I did stumble a half dozen times or so after this when partying with other people). He was reserved and I behaved too crazily for him, always wanting to be the life of the party and inventing ways to shock, entertain and amuse people. There were others who didn't always appreciate my antics and I lost a couple of jobs as a result of some things I did. I didn't necessarily have to be under the influence to act like a rascal, which most of the time was inappropriate, definitely inappropriate in a professional setting (I'd waitress-ed at 4 and 5 diamond resorts).

In May of 1993, just before breaking up w/ Les, I met the man who was to be my husband. Thomas was only two years and four days older than me. We seemed to have much in common; a shared love of animals, travel, adventure, the ocean and all it has to offer. I noticed he liked kids and happened to be great w/ all his nieces and nephews. I thought I'd never want any. Growing up, my step mom told me I was selfish and those words were a fiery arrow which pierced my heart. I didn't think I'd be a good mom since I'd have to put another human beings needs and desires before my own. At age10, a palm reader said I wouldn't have kids unless they were step or adopted and a psychic I consulted at age 25 said basically the same thing. I figured I was probably sterile since there were many times I could have been pregnant yet it never came to pass. Anyway, Thomas was the first man I'd known who seemed to have it pretty together. He had a good job, great training and talent in the Culinary Arts. I loved his family - they were great to me. He could sit quietly back, reserved and observant while I couldn't stay quiet or still for long. It seemed together, we brought balance to the other. He lavished me w/ attention and affection, including an adoring way of looking at me. In September, we moved in together and in January of 1994, he proposed.

A month after the proposal, I was in a car accident that rendered me unable to work of finish my third semester at the University of Hawaii in Hilo. My truck was totaled and I didn't receive much for it. I needed treatment 3x a week at first and Thomas faithfully drove me back and forth to my appointments which were an hour drive, one way. I wallowed in self pity and consumed quite a bit of alcohol the first few weeks. My attorney caused me grief to boot. I felt the only person really there for me was Thomas, even though family and friends would call. Of course I improved with time and treatment but I was concerned my neck, upper back and right arm and hand would never be the same. Did I realize then it could have been worse?

On July 16th 1995 Thomas and I were married. On our honeymoon to Costa Rica I expressed a desire to have a child but reconsidered a few days later, thinking maybe we should wait another year. As is the case w/ most first time mothers, I was fearful, not knowing what to expect. On May 3, 1996 our son Makana (Hawaiian word meaning "gift") was born. Since The late 80's I'd thought of myself as a spiritual person. I believed in god, angels, other spirit forces and the power of crystals. I'd pray on occasion. I believed all should follow the 10 commandments. When Makana was born, my spiritual awareness experienced something uniquely different. I knew I'd been blessed, that in my arms I held a miraculous creation from God. In addition to feeling euphoric, I was struck w/ awe. When I was alone w/ my baby and all was still, I sensed God's presence in the room w/ us.

When Makana was 5 mos old, I'd been thinking it would soon be time to return to the work force part time. In considering a sitter for Makana, I didn't know where to turn since we didn't have any family nearby (Thomas' family lives on Oahu) and it's hard to know who you can trust these days. According to what I'm certain was God's plan, I ran into Lorna, an old friend w/whom I used to work. I hadn't seen in her in years. When I asked her what she was doing these days, she said, 'child care.' I immediately inquired about her watching Makana on occasion since I knew she was a Christian. I knew her to be loving, kind, gentle and patient. After about six months, she quit doing childcare since it was interfering w/ the needs of her family.

It was May of 1997 when tensions began to mount due to finances. Thomas' employer The Mauna Lani Bay Hotel and Bungalows, closed for four months to do renovations. He received unemployment which wasn't enough to cover the bills. I wasn't working much at Hapuna Beach Prince Hotel because during the summer, there wasn't as much work for most banquet servers. I was very critical of Thomas and had thoughts of leaving him. I was an emotional mess.

Things began to look up in September. He was back to work full time and I'd transferred out of Banquets into a full-time positions as a breakfast server. The hours of 5am to noon were perfect since Thomas usually worked 2pm-10 pm. There were times however, when I was expected to work a 7am - 3pm shift and again we needed to find a new sitter. I learned from our neighbors that their friend Martha provided childcare and discovered she was another Christian! So 1-3 days per weeks, she'd watch Makana for 1 - 3 hours a day. Now neither her nor Lorna ever tried pushing their faith on me and I never viewed them as threatening but rather began to consider myself a Christian too since I admired them so much and really didn't see many differences between us. I believed in God and that Jesus existed. I'd changed so much since my teens and early twenty's, I felt fairly certain that if I were to die the next day, I'd go to heaven. It wasn't until later that I understood the verse from Matt: 7:21 "Not everyone who says unto me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven."

And then there was the phone call to place an order w/ the acquaintance who sold Amway. I reached his answering machine and his message ended w/ Jesus' words from John 14:6, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no one comes to the Father but through ME. That left me feeling a little uneasy.

May of 1998, Makana was 2 years old and we took a vacation to the mainland. We began discussing when we should plan to have a second child, even though I wondered secretly if our marriage would last til 'death due us part.' We did conceive soon thereafter and I went out on maternity leave after my 6 month. Prior to this however, a friend of Martha's named Cathy had begun watching Makana since we were "too part time" (Martha needed to fill the spot w/ someone who had full time needs since there is a limit of 5 in Hawaii, as to how many children one can watch). One day, Cathy and I had a conversation regarding our spiritual beliefs and we didn't see eye to eye. Although I felt slightly intimidated, I felt a need to attend church. Both Martha and Cathy attended First Baptist Church Waimea and I knew a couple other people who attended Mana Christian Ohana. I'd been out on leave a few weeks and hadn't attended either one. It was early December 1998, on a Sunday morning when Cathy called me and invited me to church. I showed up and most everyone embraced me, making me feel welcome. I began to hear about God's love and it didn't take long for me to realize I wasn't really a Christian after all. Due to my sin, I was separated from God - since sin can't enter into heaven. Even though I was understanding Jesus paid the price for my sins and rose from the dead, (the greatest example of a supernatural phenomena!). I had not asked Jesus to forgive me, cleanse me and come into my heart. I wanted eternal life and I knew I needed him so I began to let my guard down, not wanting pride to keep me from the truth. Questions arose that needed answering, after all, I didn't want to give myself to the Lord and be a hypocrite about it. For three weeks in a row, during the "time of commitment," I felt hot and shaky. So on January 3, 1999, having an overwhelming need to have my questions answered, I asked Pastor Ted if he and his wife Leah would come over. They showed up about 6:40 and I hadn't eaten dinner. Normally being 7mos pregnant, I would have been famished. I suppose my spiritual hunger took precedence that night. They did their best to answer my questions, taking me through parts of the book of Romans and sharing their own personal experiences. Aspects of Christianity which are difficult to comprehend do undoubtedly exist. I accepted the basic simple truths however. God loves me and has a plan for my life. I'm sinful but Jesus paid the price. With my heart in the right place, I decided to take a leap of faith and receive Him as my personal Savior and Lord. (and after having done so, scriptures that didn't make sense to me, became clear!).

Jesus says in Revelation 3:20, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him."

Some people say faith or religion is a crutch, it's something for the weak. I say it takes a lot of courage to admit we need someone or something. Jesus tells us his grace is sufficient and in our weaknesses, His power is made perfect - if only we are open to receive. I can't imagine not having Jesus Christ in my life and don't know how I went 31 years without him, now understanding He was what was missing for all those years when I was attempting to fill that void w/ drugs, alcohol, and unhealthy relationships. Walking w/ Him is exciting and He is my source of strength, comfort, joy and peace. I am thankful He is patient and during those times from my past when I was or could have been in a life or death situation, he decided I should live. Luck and coincidence are words which aren't a part of my vocabulary anymore since I know there is the Hand of God at work in my life. I'm thankful for all He's done, is doing and will do, knowing Him to be faithful, knowing He'll never leave me nor forsake me.

If you've been touched by my story and are wanting to have or renew a relationship w/ Jesus Christ, I invite you to pray the following:

Dear Jesus, I know I've sinned. I know you shed your blood and died on the cross for me and then rose again three days later. Thank you for doing that and please forgive me my sins, cleanse me Lord and come into my heart. I need you and I give you permission to be Lord of my life. In Jesus name, Amen.

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Comments 41 comments

shofarcall profile image

shofarcall 3 years ago

Thanks for sharing your powerful testimony with us. I am always awe-struck by how our Jesus, stands by and waits so patiently for us to come to Him! Really resonated to your statement that after you had accepted Jesus as your Lord and saviour, that Scripture came alive for you - that is how it is for all of us when we invite Jesus into our lives and we are baptised in the Holy Spirit. What did not make sense before, now becomes clear. Praise His Holy name.

God bless you sister.


talford profile image

talford 4 years ago from U.S.A.

Christine,

Thank you for sharing your testimony. Keep it up.

Your brother in Christ, Tom


DavePrice profile image

DavePrice 6 years ago from Sugar Grove, Ill

I see you met LG. Well, seems you tried to have a nice conversation anyway, good for you. She overwhelms some. Thanks for your testimony, and can I say that I think the greater testimony was how well you handled all the responses. Its a pleasure to meet you here. Blessings to you and your wonderful family - even the non-humans :)


speedsking 7 years ago from Seattle

Important hub!


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

Hi Lady G -

Yes, I agree with you in that many things are concealed from view..(not necessarily undiscoverable however)... to add to that, not always understood and at times different from what we may have expected.

I also agree man can throw people off. I am considered a bit of a rebel even when it comes to the corporate Christian church in my area (I've attended all except the Catholic and Lutheran) since I am not one who is concerned about pleasing man, rather my concern is in pleasing God.

Thanks for the warm holiday wishes and same to you.


Lady Guinevere profile image

Lady Guinevere 7 years ago from West Virginia

Christine, Thank you for your response and the window into your past. There are many things that are written on my hubpages that yoiu may consider not of God, but I can assure you that they are of God and Jesus. I am glad that you cleared up some misconceptions of what has been posted too. I also caution you, and I will not thrust it down your throat, that some things are hidden from view. As you read some of the things that I have written and questions that I have asked, you will begin to see those things and hopefully you will be open minded enough to do some research on your own.

It is wonderful to be pulled from the tornado and put on the right path--but men can throw you off. Well that is all I need to say at the present.

Happy and joyous holidays to you and yours.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

CS ALEXIS -

Thanks for your visit and comment. I think many can relate and was why I felt it worth sharing more of the details than I probably needed to in order to make my points.

SD and LG - I certainly can recall my youth and all the rock concerts I attended with sexual overtones as well as some of the lyrics containing other dark and evil messages. I used to have Ozzy records, Zepplin CD's etc. I always attended concerts on at least one mind and body altering substance ...sometimes three at a time. My last secular rock concert I attended was about eleven years ago....Pepsi Co. was in Hawaii and I won tickets to a Rolling Stones concert....The Stones were brought in for Pepsi's entertainment and there was room left over for some resort employees. Unfortunately, I think there is a book out there about The Stones which talks about many of the evil things they did with and to young girls - I remember Bill OReilly saying something about how he was so appalled and disappointed and torn since he so enjoyed their music but as a moral man taking a stand, probably wouldn't be able to purchase anymore of their music . Of course until I became a Christian, I didn't see anything regarding the rock and roll culture as being uncool... I understood most musicians to be promiscuous and unfortunately, there are lots of young girls who have allowed themselves to be used (I too was one). Some may think it's cool to say they've been with someone famous, others may regret it. I don't think anyone really likes being used and unappreciated however.

I found it bizarre that some would result to strange antics such as Ozzy biting bats heads off and I knew many were rumored to be satan worshippers. When one is young, feels invincible, and doesn't really care about anything other than self gratification, to ignore what many may consider disturbing and harmful is often the choice which is made with an attitude, "it won't have any ill affect on me." I now know, unless we are transformed through the renewing of our minds (through the Word of God) we leave the door open for the enemy to oh so subtley, influence our thinking.

The last great concert I saw was 4 1/2 years ago and it was Toby Mac (opening act) and Third Day. At one point, Third Day stopped playing instruments and along with 8000 concert attendees, we all were worshipping God together acapela. I was of course sober for this yet I was on a spiritual high after this concert which didn't wear off for a week and a half. "Jammin for Jesus" was one of the Everett Herald's headlines the following day.

I'm glad you don't allow your girls to listen to music with harmful lyrics LG. I'm also glad you were clean in your youth. Thankfully, because of the my Healer, any ill effects to my mind or body have been removed since the blood of the Lamb has cleansed me from all unrighteousness as a result of my confession and repentance. I know, and surely Sir Dent does as well, not all secular music is filled with wickedly suggestive content. I'm glad my boys so far have not seemed interested in any music I would object to.

Lastly, LG I'd like to address your comment:

"Christine, On my hub about why I chose LG you came at me with Satan and Biblical verses. You hadn't even really read my hub, but you assumed that I was heading or am with Satan--that is a judgement call. There is a whole lot more about me then just equating myself with a MYTH and Lady Guinevere and Camelot are myths or legends. I don't see anything wrong with that."

I did read your hub LG and after reading your response, concluded you were on the defensive rather than open so I chose not to respond. I did check out your link on magic and the Bible and the magician who the link is about, in my opinion is glorifying God. He is not a sorcerer, diviner, spiritist, medium, into witchcraft etc. (From age 18 until I got saved, I used to consider myself a white witch incidentally). I do believe there are black and whites (as well as grey areas) and there are absolutes - that truth is not just relative. I personally do not have anything against your choosing LG for your hub name - of course you are free to choose - and of course I know I don't really know you. I personally enjoy fantasies, myths, and allegories too - as long as they don't point people towards Self and away from God. I've made my choice and Jesus is the One who needs to be on the throne of my life and it is my desire to glorify Him. So no, I do not think Harry Potter and The Golden Compass are harmless yet I do enjoy Narnia, Lord of the Rings etc. I know Christians who think/feel differently and who disagree, on both sides of the issue (some think HP and TGC are fine, others who don't approve of Narnia). I also did not say you were aligning yourself with satan - I just presented a caution based on my understanding/knowledge and experience. I did not present any scripture to back up my point of view but asked your permission, which you denied. In the end, it is all between an individual and God anyway. We all have personal convictions we feel passionately about and need to be able to respectfully agree to disagree on certain subjects because man alone is not going to convince anyone of anything one is resistant to. My desire for you is peace and I hope we can continue to interact in love and humility. Thanks for extending the invite to discuss things privately via email. I invite you to do the same. The only reason I'm saying this here is because of what's already been posted.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

SirDent says:17 hours ago

Crowley wrote that law for wiccans. They wanted a nicer softer law LG. The wiccan creed is different from the book of the law.I am actually writing a new hub on titled: Do what thou wilt. You will have to wait until it is finished.

Lady Guinevere says: 17 hours ago

LG quoting SD "How much more evidence do you need? Ozzy Osbourne sang about Aleister Crowley who by the way called himself the Beast. Jimmy Page bought Crowley's house which overlooks Loch Ness."

LG says: I didn't let my girls listen to him either so what does that tell you?

(Christine here - LG also said just prior to the above comment, the same thing about not letting her girls listen to the Back Street Boys).

You also don't read the whole thing about Wicca do you and it is apparent that you aslo take their verses out of context---the law is do what thou will--as long as it harms none. Now harms none--what do you think that means?

Christine you do what you want to your own jub and whatever you want because itis Yours and yours alone. If you feel the need to delete my posts or anyone elses that is your choice, if you would like to discuss my views then you can contact me as I do look at my g-mail before I come to hubpages and other times during my day.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

This is the first time I've ever edited anothers comments but due to the content of some of the comments having "gone a little far" and not wanting to promote attacks of any kind, I've decided to do so. There is some good discussion and points made in the comments but it appears unfortunately, there are some negative personal feelings between these two hubbers which I hope they will overcome. Thanks for understanding - Christine.

SirDent says:17 hours ago

Crowley is stated by many musicians to be the patron saint of Rock and Roll. The bands of today use sex to undermine the morals that should be taught to our children. Homosexuality and references to sex are in lyrics that are aimed at teens and preteens alike.

Imagine a band of adult men on stage singing to a bunch of 12 year old girls telling them they want to have sex with them.

Crowley wrote a book called the book of the law. One line in the book sums it all up. "Do what thou wilt is the whole of the law." It actually leaves nothing out does it, no matter how grotesque or hurtful.

LG, it is not that which goes in at the mouth that defiles the body, but that which comes out defiles the whole body. What I say or write, is what I am and who I am.

Lady Guinevere says:17 hours ago

Sir Dnt, there are lots of other things in music that do not even go there. It is up to the parent to be on guard. If you think that all music does this you are wrong--way wrong. The music that I listen to doesn't have any of those kind of lyrics in them and I listen to a wide range of music. Where are you getting this from?

Lady Guinevere says:17 hours ago

Christine, On my hub about why I chose LG you came at me with Satan and Biblical verses. You hadn't even really read my hub, but you assumed that I was heading or am with Satan--that is a judgement call. There is a whole lot more about me then just equating myself with a MYTH and Lady Guinevere and Camelot are myths or legends. I don't see anything wrong with that.

I never tried any drugs while growing up. I never smoked--my father took care of that when I got real sick when he had me take ONE puff. I never had the inkling to try anything. I didn't even drink anything alcoholic until after I was married and then it was maybe once a year. I didn't have sex uptil just before I was married. In all others eyes I am a good two shoes compared to what others were doing in my teens. I am no on drigs or alcholo now and never will be.

SirDent says:17 hours ago

LG, music is marketed to younger children. Not one time did I say all music does that either. Do you listen to Back Street Boys? A couple lines from one of their songs. This is being sung to girls between the ages of 10 to 15 by the way and is targeted at them. "Get down and move it all around…Get on your knees, tryin' to scream, or touch me please… Come on girl get down, smack it up, flip it, and move it all around"

Ozzy Osbourne sang about Aleister Crowley who by the way called himself the Beast. Jimmy Page bought Crowley's house which overlooks Loch Ness.

Lady Guinevere says:

17 hours ago

Sir Dent and others who metioned crowley--you can learn andgain knowledge about him here: http://www.crystalinks.com/crowley.html


C.S.Alexis profile image

C.S.Alexis 7 years ago from NW Indiana

This hub has the feeling of roads I myself have traveled. Good thing the light has an open hand to lift us up and guide us through the harsh realities we face each day. Thank you for sharing and keep the faith. C.S. Alexis


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

Sir Dent, Eddie, Lady G -

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. This hub is a bit lengthy, I know. Thanks also for sharing about the musicians, culture surrounding the phrase included in part of my title. I did not know all this as I was 9 or 10 in 1997 and although I tried LSD once or twice and hated it.... I never knew it was legal at any point to obtain and certainly can't understand it's appeal. "Rock in roll" as a reference to sex... makes sense I suppose but it's funny that people say this now without it being sexual, "are you ready to rock in roll?" when it's "show time" or time to "get busy," "or jam;" since I've heard all that from my days of working in the restaurant business.

I do hope muscians today will not idolize this Crowley and encourage our youth to do the same.

Lady G - I'm not sure why you think I'm judging you and I'm a bit taken aback/confused by part of your first comment. I know I said after reading your hub where you speak of how you arrived at your name, that I used to share your viewpoints but not any longer but not sure why you think I'm being judgmental or unfair.


Lady Guinevere profile image

Lady Guinevere 7 years ago from West Virginia

"Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll" is a song and single by Ian Dury. It was originally released on the 1977 Stiff Records single BUY 17 "Sex And Drugs And Rock And Roll" with "Razzle In My Pocket" as the B-side. on August 26th. The song was released under the name Ian Dury. Only two members of Ian Dury and the Blockheads appear on the record, the song's co-writer Chas Jankel and saxophonist Davey Payne.


Eddie Perkins 7 years ago

Christine,

This is a beautiful testimony.

I always love to hear how Jesus Christ touched someone’s life.

Thank you very much and may God continue to guide your steps of faith. ~ eddie


SirDent 7 years ago

Sex, drugs and Rock and Roll is most likely a saying of Aleister Crowley. He was very much into the occult and satanism as you most likely know. The term Rock and Roll used to be used as a reference to sex. Crowley was a bisexual and was also into S&M.

Many musicians follow Crowley in his teachings. They lead teenagers down the path of destruction. Crowley was alo addicted to heroine. During the 50's and 60s LSD was legal to buy and sell. You could go to a headshop and buy it.

I should stop now or I will give away my next hub.


Lady Guinevere profile image

Lady Guinevere 7 years ago from West Virginia

How can you sit in judgement of me? Of all the things that you went through, I did npt go through even half of that, but I did find my peace with God and Jesus.

What you went through is all culminated in who you are today at the point of when you wrote this hub. There is nothing you could have done that would have brought you to a different point. God chooses things for us to go through for a reason and that is to make us stronger and to bring us back to him, as if we ever left him.

It is all in LOVE and compassion for each other--no matter who they are or what they have done, because we don't know what God has chosen for their path to get them back to him---that is why we should not judge--least we get that back.

Please do not judge me by one hub that I wrote. That is very unfair.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks Sir Dent!  That means a lot coming from you.  Great scriptures God put on your heart - thanks for sharing them.  Currently in regards to the night - some of the greatest work we can do is pray - although I haven't been the intercessor lately I know I'm capable of so if you think of including me while in your own prayer closet (or gathered with others for the purpose of prayer), I'd appreciate it!

Merry Christmas to you and yours and may you continue to experience His peace, favor, anointing along with various multitudes of other blessings! 


SirDent 7 years ago

This is an awesome testimony of God's grace and love. It really touched my heart as I read it. If we are faithful to confess our sins, God is faithful and JUST to forgive us our sins.

Rev 12:10 And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.

Rev 12:11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.

Keep letting your light shine.

Joh 9:4 I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.

To God be the glory forever. \o/


christinekv profile image

christinekv 7 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks Pastor C...This was pretty detailed regarding the first 30 years of my life, leading up to my decision for Jesus..... I keep thinking I should do a "part two" regarding how He has movedm, revealed himself to me etc now that I'm coming up on my 10 year born again bitrhday!


drpastorcarlotta profile image

drpastorcarlotta 7 years ago from BREAKOUT MINISTRIES, INC. KC

Your testimony pleases GOD!!! And that's what matters!!! Praise God for you my love!!!!


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks for reading and commenting dennithompson...blessings to you as well!


dennithompson profile image

dennithompson 8 years ago from NEW GLASGOW

hi am really happy to read your experience with GOD. you are his chosen. GOD has worked in you. please dont ever let go of the faith that you have and i l definetly pray for it.. am really blessed to read it. Our GOD is a merciful god and will definetly forgive your sins just like the parable of prodigal son LUKE 15:11-32

GOD bless


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks Sam..I'm sure there are those who can identify, similar yet we all have our unique story!


soyelude profile image

soyelude 8 years ago from Lagos - Nigeria

Some Testimony.....like i said;this is the kind of stuff that touches and changes lives!!! Well done Christine...I've been truly blessed!!


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks Sschilke!

Thanks Ty for the reference to the author and her books...I am not a stranger to warfare and how the devil attempts to deceive but I know there is always more to learn. I had not heard of this author before and would love an opportunity to check out her material. Sounds like she has an anointing for sure....PTL!


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Tyhill27 8 years ago from Red Deer, Alberta

Yes I realize that it did not bother you at all and seemed harmless. It's just that I am sure that it was Satan who said, sex, drugs, and rock and roll. It came across to me that they were telling you you’re not too old to keep living the party life. Your testimony made things clear to me. Satan is very smart and deceptive, just as he was in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. The thing was Adam knew better and should have rebuked the Serpent! I am not sure how well you understand Satan's kingdom but if you really want to know you should read a book called "He Came To Set the Captives Free" by Rebecca Brown,,, another book she wrote is Prepare for War. In the first book I mentioned it goes very deep into Satan's kingdom on earth. The only way Rebecca knows this information is because she led the top witch in the US, very high in Satanism to Jesus. Satan is united in purpose when it comes to distorting mankind, that's why I am so determined with God's help to unite the body of Christ!


sschilke profile image

sschilke 8 years ago

christinekv,

Loved it, just loved it.

sschilke


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Hi Ty -

Thanks for reading and commenting. About a year or so after becoming a Christian, I was approached by a couple of women from The Christian Womens Club in my town in Hawaii and was asked if I'd present my testimony at a luncheon (two different occassions and locations). I was told I needed to speak for approx 20 minutes, focusing on life pre Christ, what was happening to lead up to my recognizing my need for Him, and then my making my decision and my life after. It should actually be a little more balanced than it is; I probably could shorten my first and middle part somewhat, add a little more to the last. This is actually a blend of my first draft (which was even more detailed) and my final (which had less detail)...I'd given away my last copy of my final not realizing it was my last one and I haven't found it saved anywhere else (like a floppy).

Hmm your sharing about your mom sounds like what I'd just about exactly say about my own....there are some in my family who have a lot of faith in their intellect...not allowing the heart to rule over the mind, there are some who have experienced a negative witness from others who were supposed to be Christians (I think many like to use this excuse, even though I am saddened to hear some of these accounts)and lastly, there is probably an element of fear. Even many Christians fear a real encounter w/our Risen King...putting him in a box, not allowing the Spirit to move in power and bring freedom and deliverance....I think I'm the only one in my immediate family who has accepted Christ too with the exception perhaps of my youngest sister but her roots never went deep...hopefully she will recommit one day. Then there is my dad who I'm pretty confident I'll see again - if you want to check out my "Dad I miss you" piece you'll understand more.

Thanks for wanting to be protective of me regarding the person who left that one comment... whoever it was just said "I'm too young" so I didn't really feel insulted or anything. Maybe you're discerning something I was unaware of..


Tyhill27 profile image

Tyhill27 8 years ago from Red Deer, Alberta

Wow what a story Christine, I would have liked to read this sooner. The only reason I found hubpages was because when I was doing research for the United body of Christ Mission one of your hubs come up from the topic in Google. Then I decided to write an essay about it. Thank you so much for sharing your story and it was very encouraging to me. I don't think I have ever heard a testimony in so much detail before and I really do hope that the Lord will use it to help others find Jesus. My story is similar but yet completely different, I would love to get it on paper as well as yours is. I don't talk about my past very much but I can relate on many things. The part of your testimony that I really wish my mother would understand, is the part where the bible verses will make sense after you give your heart Jesus. The deception is though, she still thinks she understands them. Or maybe she does not want to give her life to Jesus, but I know she would if she understood... At the moment I am the only believer in my family, and have been now for six years in Aug. About the person that put the comment on your page, about answering the question about who said sex, drugs and rock and roll. I REBUKE YOU IN THE NAME OF JESUS, LEAVE CHRISTINE ALONE! SHE’S A CHILD OF GOD…


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Dayzeebee and Ceounlimited, thank you (salamat!) so much for visiting and commenting...I would love to see that gratitude dance Dayzee; and yes (amen!) Ceo, Rom:828 is dear to my heart and true for many more than just me!

God's blessings to you both!


ceounlimited profile image

ceounlimited 8 years ago from California

Hi christinekv, God knows the road we take... from the beginning. Isn't it great to look back over your experiences and know that everything, though some experiences are negative, "...works together for the good to them that love the Lord, for those who are the called according to His purpose..." Great Hub


dayzeebee profile image

dayzeebee 8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

hello christinekv i am blessed with your sharing. God is good indeed! i'm moved to do the gratitude dance! great testimony of God's boundless love.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Does anyone want to let me know who said it, as I would be interested in knowing.....thanks Answer The Question for visiting and the comment. It's nice to hear I'm young when, numberwise, I'm actually middle aged.


ANSWER THE QUESTION 8 years ago

WELL SO YOU NEVER DID FIND OUT WHO SAID "SEX, DRUGS AND ROCK AND ROLL?" YOU ARE TOO YOUNG


einron profile image

einron 8 years ago from Toronto, Ontario, CANADA

It's a powerful testimony. Thank God you have been able to repudiate your past, repent and turn to our Almighty God who does not turn away anyone who seeks Him. May Jesus continue to uphold you in the future. God bless.


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks for visiting and taking the time to read and comment Rob, Cristina, Jim and Momma' write! Glory to God, PTL for his Love, Power and the mysterious ways in which He works and brings about His purposes!


momma's write profile image

momma's write 8 years ago from NC

What a wonderful testimony!


Jim 8 years ago

Christine....

I am truly happy that you shared this with me and you being whom you are, it's a pleasure having you as a friend, I respect you with everything in this world and then some. Anyhow, thanks again for sharing this.

All the best,

Jim


cristina327 profile image

cristina327 8 years ago from Manila

Thank you for sharing this beautiful story of conversion. Truly God' grace is amazing in your life.


Rob Jundt profile image

Rob Jundt 8 years ago from Midwest USA

Christine, your story is beautiful in its redemption. My life's struggles would surely drive me loony if I didn't have faith in Christ to guide me. We CAN'T live this thing called life alone. We are all called to be with God and accept his purposes for us. My hope and prayers are for all who truly seek and find the source of all joy: GOD! I thank you greatly for your transparency and honesty. Blessings to you!


christinekv profile image

christinekv 8 years ago from Washington Author

Thanks for reading, sharing and for being so encouraging LisaG! Our experiences definitely shape us and those wrong choices can be oh so valuable when we learn from them....I'm often moved to pray when I see (or hear of) things from my past being repeated in the lives of some young people today. Being reminded of where I've been helps me to be humble and helps me to be merciful and compassionate towards others when they, based on attitudes or actions, make it clear they are not ready to leave it all behind and trust in the One who wants to prosper them and provide them w/hope and a future.


LisaG profile image

LisaG 8 years ago from Caribbean

I loved your story. I can relate to exactly what you have been through.

Youth is a time when we have to experience the good, bad and ugly. It is only when we get older then we can look back and appreciate where and what went wrong in our lives.

Regardless of what we have done Jesus loves us, and as long as we repent and change our lives he will forgive us and all our past sins will be washed away.

Keep writing and sharing the word and you will always be blessed.

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