Tips on Dating an Aries Woman
So You Really Want to Date an Aries Woman?
Good luck to you! If you are in pursuit of an Aries woman, get ready for the most intriguing, frustrating, satisfying, exhausting ride of your life. And this is true for both successful and unsuccessful relationships.
By the end of this page, you'll have (mostly) everything you need to know about dating an Aries woman successfully.
True to form, I'm the author of this page and I am an Aries. If you're reading this, I would happily bet $25 that you are either another Aries woman, or perhaps an Aries man, or a man of any other sign except Taurus and Virgo. Either that, or you stumbled upon this page by way of something else, and stopped out of sheer curiosity.
Why Write This Page?
I approach this purely from personal point of view. Naturally, Aries women are curious about ourselves. We're also careful observers of other people ("perceptive" describes us to a tee). I suppose just as naturally, a good 30% of my many female friends are Aries, too. And probably 50% of the women I dislike are Aries. I know a lot about Aries. We're not all candy and kisses, bounced checks (well, most of us are) or flirts. We're very complex people. But there are some things that are pretty much dead on in terms of dating.
Disclaimer: I'm not an astrologer. I'm an ARIES. :) That said, this is still going to be just as semi-reliable as everything else you've ever read about Aries women. But remember, sun sign is just one part of this massive puzzle of personality and compatibility.
For that matter I am also a Monkey on the Chinese zodiac. If you know anything about Monkeys, put that together with Aries and what do you get?
Who Are Aries Women?
Aries are born between March 21 and April 20. Depending on exactly when the birthday falls, the Aries woman is going to be more or less like the description on this page. My birthday happens to be April 4, which places me as close to true Aries as it gets. Some women are more like Tauruses (those born closer to April 20), and others are more like Pisces (those born closer to March 21).
We are associated with the RAM. What vision comes to mind when you think of a ram? Probably something unpleasant. Unfortunately, that's our sign. It comes in handy sometimes, but I believe it does us an injustice!
As the first sign of the tropical zodiac, Aries is seasonally associated with spring and according to astrologers represents a strong, sometimes creative thrust and powerful expression of energy. The sign is governed by Mars, the planet of activity and assertiveness, which astrologers believe adds the traits of competitiveness, impulsiveness, and the instinct to act spontaneously. The Sun is also strongly associated with this sign, which it governs by exaltation. The solar-association is seen as adding expression of the ego, and the desire to make a mark as an individual. Joanna Watters (2003) defined a keyphrase for this sign as "I am".
Tips for Successfully Dating an Aries Woman
I read something that I thought was funny about Aries women. It said that you don't go out and get Aries women - they happen to you. That's probably true. Nevertheless, read on for tips on how to have a relationship with an Aries woman.
Then, read the rest of the page to really figure out how to make these tips work.
- Don't believe everything you read about Aries women. We are even more complicated than that.
- The space we require has very little to do with you, and almost everything to do with us. We even need space from our own kids. Don't take it personally. We are truly independent people.
- Learn to lead. We enjoy leading but hate being forced to lead.
- Be romantic - or at least make it a goal to learn how.
- Be honest. We will figure you out anyway.
- Take us out in public every once in a while.
- Compliments cover a multitude of sins.
- Don't flaunt money or possessions. And certainly do not equate yourself with your money.
- We're okay with being friends first, but we can't be just friends for too long.
- We will offer to pay for ourselves and may even require you to let us. But we do like being taken care of, too.
- Don't buy clothing for us, especially if whatever you want to buy is very different from what we usually wear.
- Don't point out our mistakes. We do that ourselves.
- Be quick to forgive. For the most part, we are.
First Things First: What Aries Women Like and Dislike
Please pass the information from this page on to men you know who are interested in dating Aries women. They will need it. And most likely, they will NOT accept it in the form of astrology, because like many other aspects of the Aries' personality, this is just too out there for them. So you'll just have to pretend you discovered this some other way.
What Aries Women Like
- Assertiveness: We are assertive, and believe me, we really, really like assertive men. Let me say this again: we really, really like assertive men. If you are a jerk, in the beginning, we will find you fascinating. But even more so, we will find the fact that we are fascinated by you fascinating (hidden critical factor #1). The more assertive you are, the better. However, we will not tolerate meanness, cruelty, rudeness, being impolite, or impatience (from you). Don't rush us unless you do it in a way that makes us feel good (like, "C'mon, baby. We're going to be late. You know you always look good anyway!")
- Rough and Tough: Strangely, Aries women will at some point in their life find "real men" attractive. If you are a sexy carpenter, firefighter, or soldier, we will probably be interested in you purely for the fact that the work you do is physical. We are physical people attracted to physical people. And we will have vivid imaginations to go along with this.
- Intelligence: While Aries women are incredibly open-minded and tend not to judge (we're too inwardly focused for that), we do appreciate and even idolize intelligence. What makes this point interesting is that physical attractiveness comes in a distant second to intelligence (perhaps even third or fourth). We don't have the patience for simple-minded men. If you can beat us in a debate, we will not forget that and probably obsess over that, quite possibly tricking ourselves into thinking that we are very interested in you, when in fact, we are mostly interested in the fact that you beat us at something.
- Attention: While we are not necessarily egotistic people, Aries women are ego-centric, and there is a huge difference. We devote quite a bit of attention to ourselves and expect our partners to do the same (as in, devote quite a bit of attention to us).The more attentive you are, the higher you will score. This could also mean being aware of the times when we need our space. Learn to read us. We are so obvious - we are actually incapable of being devious unless we are physically miles and miles away from you - that we expect (logically) that you will understand us. Pay attention.
What Aries Women Dislike
- Laziness: If you are lazy, but we generally like your other traits, Aries women will simply try to get you to not be lazy. However, be well aware that your being lazy is extremely off-putting. Example: You are incredibly tech-savvy, but you work in a hotel lobby as a doorman. Uh-uh. That will not fly with us for long.
- Dishonesty: Aries women are natural lie detectors. So don't even try lying to us, and please do not flaunt your flair for dishonesty to us, because we're not impressed by it. We are such open books that we believe other people should be, too. After all, if we will openly admit our flaws, we expect that you can do the same. The truth is that you will find no less judgmental woman than an Aries, so your best bet is to be honest and upfront. We will either show you right away how disgusted we are with you, or we will tell you WHY it's not such a big deal. We are skilled problem-solvers and like to see things from all angles.
- Disrespect: Yes, it's okay for you to be a real man. In fact, it's encouraged. But swearing at us in public, or expecting us to sit in the backseat, is just not going to work. We love being women - we're both feminine and feminist at the same time. We want you to pay for our meals, but we don't want you to order our food for us or tell us how to order our steaks. And please do not tell us how to dress like a woman or that we should be quieter.
Who Aries Women Are: Feminine Feminists
There really is no better way to describe our approach to love and dating. We are truly feminine feminists. We KNOW we are capable people. We can survive without you - and might have to, because it's so hard for us to find good matches in men. At the same time, we're affectionate people that need and desire to both love and admire and be loved and admired back.
I read once that Aries women are attracted to the catch. That's not necessarily true. As we get older, we are tired of chasing men. The men we chase usually run away, which makes us ill. And the men who chase us are brute idiots, which also makes us ill. We are difficult women to please. But DO NOT expect us to chase you. It will not happen. If you're interested in an Aries woman over the age of 28, you're going to have to roll up your sleeves and figure her out. She is impatience in every aspect EXCEPT the ability to keep looking for the right guy.
(1) We're So Feminine
Aries women - the ones I know, and I know a pretty decent amount - are good looking people, generally. We are not always like Victoria Beckham (an Aries woman married to a Taurus man), but we do like to feel and be attractive. We may be naturally attractive, and so not all of us wear coats of makeup or hiked up skirts.
But we do wear skirts. And we like to feel feminine and to be told we are girly. Even if we don't personally feel that way about ourselves, we certainly like to hear it from you. Why? Because that means you are watching us, and we are happy to know you are watching us.
You will probably find us in heels, and you will probably find us in jobs that are compatible with womanhood. While we might tell you we are going to serve on the front line, that will most likely never, ever happen. We are big dreamers but we're far too feminine for that. We are satisfied in knowing that in a shooting match, we will beat you. The knowledge of that is enough for us; we don't necessarily need to prove it to you.
What about sports? We play sports - we're sporty and enjoy competition. But don't be surprised if then we shower and throw on heels and a dress to go out. That's just how we roll.
Because we're feminine, we really do not appreciate feminine men unless they are strictly platonic friendships. Men who desire too much attention, show too much emotion, or are catty or gossippy will turn us off in a heartbeat. We are too busy to deal with your emotion, and most likely we are extremely emotional ourselves. We can't handle much more emotion than what we bring to the table.
(2) We're So Feminist
We believe that as women, we are simply good enough. Aries women find the stay-at-home mom thing really annoying, especially if it comes from a place of tradition rather than practicality. We believe that to be capable is to be appointed. In other words, we feel that if you are able to do something, you probably should at least attempt to do that. Nothing bugs us more than women who go to college, get married, and pop out kids without even attempting to use her skills and education.
We don't like taking a backseat to men unless it is earned. That's why we love intelligence. If you are smarter than us, this only attracts us more and more. But if you are macho and stupid, we will instantly dislike you. This is why it's difficult for us to tell at first glance who we will love. If you look manly, but you are a jackass, we will hate you. If you look like a nerd but keep us on our toes with your wit and attention, we are yours forever.
We will fall in love at first sight and fall out of love at second sight, and think nothing of it. That's just how we do things.
A Few Aries Love Matches and Love Disasters
I don't like compatibility charts and dialogues, but there are some matches that have about a 99% failure rate.
Aries Love Disasters
If you are Capricorn, you can forget about it. We will be interested in you because you don't appear to be interested in us and that is practically unbelievable to us. When we discover that you ARE interested in us but you are the slowest penny pinching man in the Zodiac, we will instantly realize our experiment has failed. While we will appreciate and strongly respect your loyalty, intelligence, and wit, we will actively try to figure out how we can break up with you. When we do, we will, and that will be that.
The reality is that if you are Capricorn, you will almost certainly not be interested in us beyond our looks, position, or intelligence. So this whole point is moot.
Update 12/2012: I still stand by the theory that true Capricorn men will not truly be interested in Aries women. That is not to say that they will not pursue them, for Capricorn men are extremely intelligent and know a woman's worth. Pay particular attention to age. Young Capricorn men are more willing to bend than older ones.
If you are Scorpio, please realize that the likelihood of a relationship crashing and burning is a near certainty. We will not put up with your severe possessiveness, insecurity, and tendency to pass mean, snide, or just catty remarks. We are fighters but don't like those who pick fights. We also find your attraction to vengeance irritating. Get over it, already. We love you in the bedroom, but can't get over the fact that you need us so much. And we're afraid of you a little bit, too.
If you are a Virgo, we will fail you. We are not perfect - we're probably the most likely to screw something up, actually. And we don't always wash our hands ten times a day, and we think it's funny to poke fun of your hair. We find your perfectionism annoying, even though oddly you think it will make us like you more. We're not impressed by your success, so much as your ability to be successful. So stop telling us about it. The only thing that will make this relationship last is if we get so tired, we stop fighting you. You'll only have half a woman, and that is no way to live.
Aries Love Matches
If you are a Taurus, many, many astrologers will insist that this relationship will not last. I say otherwise. Yes, you Taurus men are so slow and so freaking stubborn. You make us crazy; you drive us to insanity. However, we are interested in changing your mind. You are like a treadmill. We will never be able to outrun you but we will enjoy trying. Plus, we enjoy the fact that you like to touch us and that you are slow and sensual and sensitive sometimes. We also love the fact that you accept us the way we are, because most other signs in the Zodiac can hardly tolerate our faults. In the Taurus man, we find stability, strength, intelligence, and a subtle sexiness that drives us wild. If you can manage to pay attention to us whenever we need it, this relationship can work.
If you are Aquarius, we will probably fall head over heels in love with you, but try not to be so... up in the air? It's okay that you are sensitive, flirty, loving and accepting. But you need to remember that we're only okay with you being that way with US. I suppose Aquarius may be the only other sign who can match us in terms of inward focus. We both love to gab about ourselves, which may help this relationship succeed.
If you are a Gemini, we will make a great match - definitely as friends, and we will certainly try our fate as lovers. We find you funny, great-looking, intelligent, and courageous. We love your optimistic outlook, too. But you are duplicitous in nature, as Geminis tend to be. You are like two people in one, and most of the time we will spend trying to figure out whether or not you truly want to be with us. In the end, it may work, especially if the Aries woman you are dating is incredibly devoted to you. However, be prepared for us to be heartbroken even if we don't really know if there is a reason to be. You confuse us, and we don't like feeling confused and insecure.
Many astrologers suggest that the Aries-Sagittarius relationship has the strongest chance of success. Unfortunately, I have never had the pleasure of dating or even meeting a Sagittarius man. I'm not even sure they exist (except my son, who is a Sagittarius). Most of the men I meet and attract are Scorpios and Capricorns. So unfortunate!
Other Aries Love Matches
Because this page is my personal point of view, I really cannot speak for other Aries love matches. I have only ever dated the signs described above. And I've dated enough of the men in each of those categories to feel confident describing them that way.
For your specific match, I suggest googling it. There is a lot of pretty interesting and rather accurate information out there on love matches.
Final Thoughts: What We Offer
No matter how inwardly focused we can be, Aries women love to love. We are passionate, fiercely loyal people who care deeply for our loved ones.
We will defend you, encourage you, support you, and work very hard to make you understand how much we adore you. One of the things that make us interesting is that we are well-aware that we are independent, and that we have to work harder than others at being in relationships. So if we are with you, it's because we really want to be. We would be fine on our own, but we choose to be with you.
We are friendly women, too. Aries women tend to have many friends - not many super-close friends - but many friends in general. We are liked by both men and women. It's unnecessary to be jealous for us, because we are loyal. If we flirt, the likelihood is that we are doing it on purpose. Perhaps you need to show more attention or to notice that we are flirting and ask us to cut it out.
We get over things quickly. We have tempers. We say things we don't mean. Then we get over it. Unfortunately, we sometimes expect you to do the same, even though it's not that easy. Forgive us for that. Realize that we forgive and truly forget even the most heinous of relationship crimes (including things like cheating). We are trusting to a fault.
What are your experiences with Aries women? I'd love to hear! Feel free to comment.
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