Weed Killer

i can't grasp

what you promise

because i'm tangled

in the vines.


a promise of life

a promise to prosper

if i could just cut myself loose.


and what i want

is so close to me

if only to be free from

entanglements


a promise of life

a promise to prosper

if i could just cut myself loose

maybe just find some Raid

and watch the vines wither

and watch the vines die

and free myself from what entangles

and let the flowers come to life.



copyright 2010 Justin W Price

My poetry collection

Thanks for Reading.

A FREELANCE WRITER, HONORS STUDENT AND GOVER PRIZE FINALIST, JUSTIN W. PRICE (AKA, PDXKARAOKEGUY) CONSIDERS HIMSELF A POET FIRST AND FOREMOST BUT IS ALSO A SKILLED SHORT STORY, BIOGRAPHER AND HUMOR WRITER. HIS POETRY COLLECTION,DIGGING TO CHINA, WILL BE RELEASED FEBRUARY 2ND, 2013 BY SWEATSHOPPE PUBLICATIONS AND IS CURRENTLY AVAILABLE ON AMAZON AS WELL AS YOUR LOCAL BOOKSELLER.

HIS WORK WILL ALSO BE FEATURED IN BEST NEW FICTION (2014 EDITION), AND HAS APPEARED PREVIOUSLY IN THE RUSTY NAIL, EFICTION, EFICTION HUMOR, THE CRISIS CHRONICLES, THE HELLROARING REVIEW AND THE BELLWETHER REVIEW. HE CURRENTLY SERVES AS MANAGING EDITOR OF EHORROR MAGAZINE AND THE BRIDGE ONLINE NEWSPAPER. HE PREVIOUSLY SERVED AS THE POETRY AND CORRESPONDENCE EDITOR FOR THE BELLWETHER REVIEW.

HE WORKS AS A FREELANCE WRITER, EDITOR, AND GHOST WRITER, AND IS WORKING TOWARDS HIS PH.D. HE LIVES IN A SUBURB OF PORTLAND, OREGON WITH HIS WIFE, ANDREA, AND THEIR LABRADOODLE, BELLA.

PLEASE VISIT HIS PROFILE PAGE FOR MORE INFORMATION. THANKS!

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Comments 14 comments

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PDXKaraokeGuy 3 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks Stricktly!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 3 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks Stessily. I like your interpretation. Thanks for stopping by. It's always nice to see you.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 3 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Gus, thanks for your analysis. I'm sure you've hit on at least one of the reasons. The clumsy use of language is certainly another :-)


stricktlydating profile image

stricktlydating 3 years ago from Australia

I love it, great work!


stessily 4 years ago

Justin, I like it. I also like your revision. I like them both; they give a different perspective, one really microscopic, the other more of a panorama.

Appreciatively, Stessily


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 4 years ago from USA

Howdy PDXKaraokeGuy - It is possible that I have uncovered why, in one of your responses, you claim to dislike this poem. "Raid" is an insect zapper - not a weed killer. I know that you knew this, but there it was, lurking away as the weapon you sought to clobber your "vine."

Sometimes good writers keep a word lurking in their well-traveled brains, and that word pops out of the keyboard when least expected. It happens to all of us. Sometimes that may be quasi-intentional. Witness this:

"The product's advertising tagline, "Raid Kills Bugs Dead," was created by the advertising agency Foote, Cone & Belding. The phrase itself is often attributed to the poet Lew Welch, who worked for the agency at the time."

Had that poet just then finished reading about the Viking raids, or an intended raid on the ice cream in the freezer? One may never find out. But the poet gave birth to an advertising phrase that has lingered in use since sometime in 1966. :)

Gus :-)))


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Amy, thank you. I'm glad to hear that!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

I like it (for what that's worth)!


goego profile image

goego 5 years ago from Loserland

honesty is key


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PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

i know. i don't like this poem. i don't care what others think :-)


goego profile image

goego 5 years ago from Loserland

the weeds distracted me, damn-it don't ever show weakness these are 'your' thoughts who cares what anybody else thinks


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

I'll check it out. for the record, I don't like this one. I plan on revising it this weekend


goego profile image

goego 5 years ago from Loserland

wrote one you might like.. its called time to pay is winding down


p.jay 6 years ago

i LIKE YOUR WRITING prehaps we could disscus helping with the writing of a book if all goes well i have at least 3 or 4 other book thoughts thank you for sharing your work this way i liked your writing style, please e-mail me at p.jayjackson@yahoo.com thank you p.jay

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    PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

    Justin W. Price (PDXKaraokeGuy)742 Followers
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    Justin W. Price, AKA PDXKaraokeGuy, is a freelance writer, blogger, and award- nominated author based out of Portland, Oregon.



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