Where We Go From Here
"I dedicate this hub to The Goldstein Sisters; Dorothy, Frieda, and my mother Jeanette...may your spirits find joy and happiness in the company of one another and other departed family members."...Lew Newmark, son of Jeanette.
Today is October 30th, a day before Halloween...and it's also my mother Janet (Jeanette for those of you who want to get formal about her name).
My mother has been gone for four years now, this past August, and while I don't talk that much about this anymore every once in a while those feeling creeps up on me.
The feelings of lose and sadness, maybe a bit of depression...and also those moments that still help me smile just a bit. I'm writing this hub at my kitchen table, and I see the things that remind me of my mother all about me. The miniature grandfather clock that she and my dad gave to us as a house warming gift, the pictures of her with my dad and my daughter when she was small.
I also can still see her vividly as she lay on the couch in the living room, her thoughts far away as she thought about my dad who had passed away; I also remember many of the arguments that we'de had after she was staying here with us in our home. But there is one picture that really polarizes me today and has my attention.
It's a picture of my mother with her sister, my Aunt Dotty (Dorothy) and my cousin Randy. The picture is of the three of them at a local beach in Brooklyn (I think anyway) taken on one of the many trips that my mother made down to Brooklyn after my dad's passing.
Recently, my Aunt passed away, and as I reflected on her passing the things that I thought to myself at the time were the following:
- This was the end of an era in my family
- I thought that now the Golstein sisters were finally together again in a better place than this plane of existence.
The latter thought to be honest with you is more for my comfort I think than any reference to anything of a religious nature. I want to point out to any one reading this hub, that I'm not overly religious, nor very spiritual in nature..and yet the thought of my aunt being reunited with her two sisters seems to offer me some measure of comfort.
But the question that I have to ponder today (of all days) is this; Where do we go from here? When we finally succumb to the ever increasing limits that Time places upon us, what's next for us?
Is it really just "Ashes to Ashes, and Dust to Dust?"
Or is there something more? Does the human spirit really just end at our passing, or is there somewhere else that we ascend to? It's a tricky question and I know that what you think about when you answer this question has a lot to do with your own beliefs and your faith in an all powerful, and yet unseen supreme being to whom we refer to as "God."
In my case, I'm not entirely sold on the "God" concept since I do believe in science and technology...and yet, I'm able to find comfort in this one little thing that I'm able to tell myself sometimes...my mom and dad, are in a better place now. They are with those relatives in my family that have left this earthly plane of existence, and have moved above the heavens to another, better place.
In this better place, they are freed from their earthly woes and other concerns; They are healthy and whole again and I see them at the moment in their lives when they were at their best. Vibrant and youthful and happy.
I guess this is a question left to better minds than mine, but I know that this is the one thing that gives me the most solace. When I have those other thoughts that tend to affect me in less than the best way, these are the sort of thoughts that seem to help me get through those tough moments.
So as I look at the melting snow of a strange and unexpected October storm, I say Happy Birthday to my mother Janet.
"Always loved, never forgotten, always in my heart and mind, and forever missed"
Your loving son
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