World Spinning and the Tears Swell...

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Panic ~ Red

World Spinning off its axis

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Hold Me Now ~ Red

A poem in the world not of the world

World spinning off its axis,

while in modes of gross distinction.

Right, no wrong, good, no bad,

stained, in righteous indignation.


And the tears swell…


Assuming species, thus believing,

self-preservation means to an end?

Limiting our call to action,

to share The Story with a friend.


And the tears swell…


Ridiculous bound in earthly chatter,

unknowing or remembering when,

His blood poured out was all that mattered,

and all the matters in the end.


And the tears swell…


Little do we know our purpose,

sadly seeking less and less,

with fresh blood dripping all around us,

slipping deeply, tangled mess.


And the tears swell…


Stop the volume cool the temp,

helping to control the ice,

pouring over an earthly fire,

grasping at the living life.


And the tears swell…


Earthly stain has nothing binding,

for belief has set us free.

Presumptive denial of grace sufficient,

rarely looking up to Thee.


And the tears swell…


Blameless by His burden taken,

broken as He paid the price.

His blood made free the world shaken,

whence freedom came from sacrifice.


And the tears swell…


Remember when we called His name,

for once we sought Him readily.

Denial in the wake of shame,

shuts the door to trusting Thee.


And the tears swell…


Sad paradoxical disobedience,

aloof we move to the distant place.

Shake us loose from this conundrum,

remind us of your perfect grace.


And the tears swell…


Though we know of our disdain,

deserving nothing as we flee.

We battle propaganda made,

against the precious word of Thee.


And the tears swell…


Amazed at love in distribution,

amongst the shattered world seen.

Knowing God is the solution,

looming Spirit sets us free.


And the tears swell…


Earthly barrier will awaken,

shining from above so grand.

We will reach and then be taken,

to our home and Heaven land.


And the tears swell…

RED ~Ordinary World

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Comments 10 comments

The Stages Of ME profile image

The Stages Of ME 2 years ago Author

Catherine ~

Thank you for your comment, your time and your advice. You're awesome!


CatherineGiordano profile image

CatherineGiordano 2 years ago from Orlando Florida

Nicely done. I like the changes you made to the poem. Now write the next one.


The Stages Of ME profile image

The Stages Of ME 2 years ago Author

Thank you MsDora :)


MsDora profile image

MsDora 2 years ago from The Caribbean

"Little do we know our purpose." That verse touches me deeply, although the entire poem is profound. And your solution is right on! Thanks for this powerful presentation.


The Stages Of ME profile image

The Stages Of ME 2 years ago Author

Catherine ~

Thank you so much for your input, I appreciate the critique so very much. I went back and changed the line and it flows so much better. It's so nice to have another pair of eyes on a piece. After reading your hub of the day on Poems, I knew you would have some good insight. I am not skilled in this area of poetry, but have a passion for sharing my heart, so again, thank you. You were so kind to check it for me. God Bless


The Stages Of ME profile image

The Stages Of ME 2 years ago Author

DDE ~

Thank you for your time and caring about the subject, so glad it matters to you, many blessing to you :)


CatherineGiordano profile image

CatherineGiordano 2 years ago from Orlando Florida

I thought this was an excellent poem. I loved your use of repetition. You used rhyme very well--it was subtle. Very good topic also--a poem should always have a message. Since you asked for a critique in your email, I have one suggestion. Having committed to rhyme and structure, I feel you need to use it in every stanza. The "Amazed at love in distribution" stanza drops the rhyme.


DDE profile image

DDE 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

You have shared such beautiful words.


The Stages Of ME profile image

The Stages Of ME 2 years ago Author

Thank you Jodah, this comment means so much to me. I was hoping the message would be seen by at least one. Now I am so blessed to see it did its service. Peace and blessings to you :)


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

What amazing poetry. The rhyme and rhythm is outstanding and the message so important. Tank you for writing and sharing this The Stages of ME. Voted up.

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