Been chatting to this guy online who is (sounds!!) really nice.
He says because he is a Christian and I am not we cannot have a any kind of future.
I thought I was a Christian, but he is quite sure I'm not.
so here is my question
Can a non- christian go out with a Christian.
If he is judging you already then dump the relationship, you are who you are, not who he wants you to be, good luck !
I think he spoke too quickly and judgementally.Perhaps he should have gotten to know you better.However, without knowing his side any further, I could deduce that he may be refering to the strong Christian belief that as God would state in the Bible, 'do not find a mate where you will be unequally yoked'. In otherwords, do not marry someone who could not share your same beliefs in God and there is truth and logic in that. First, it's not to exclude non-Christians as if they are some sort of vile human filth, but just to say that if you don' agree on basic principals, your relationship will falter and be weak. This could be said on any subject-of any sort.
Do not be dismayed. I would talk to the gentleman and sy to him that you believe, if true, that God brought you two together to find that opportunity to witness to each other.I time, listen to what he says about God. If he is important to you,so will his religion be. You don't have to agree or become a Christian.But use this opportunity to get to know him and God better. Then you can split ways if necessary. I do not believe it is that time to split now.You haven't given him a chance andvisa versa.
Well, in your Hub "Finding a great Partner". You actually posted a link to a Singles Christian Dating site, encouraging people to give it a try. I'm guessing, if you've done that, it can't be a bad thing.
Follow your Heart or ask him how you could be the sort of Christian he is.
Are you serious? He can't tell you that you aren'ta christian. If you say you are how can he say you aren't. And I don't think religion should really matter that much
Well, first off, since you met him online, you don't really know who he is, do you ?
Like the cartoon says: One of the great things about the internet is nobody knows you're really a dog.
Ask him what he means by he is a Christian. I'll bet my bottom dollar he'll say because he believes in Christ and he accepted Christ and all that crap. In which case you can tell him somebody else told you his is a "standards" Christianity, not a Scripture Christianity.
You probably told him you have not accepted Christ as your "personal Savior" which is why he says you're not a Christian, and I think at this stage, you both not knowing yet the color of the other's eyes, talking about the future is rather....corny ?
You're not bothered, depressed, bewildered.
I like that.
You got a good head on those shoulders.
Take it from this Christian.
You don't wanna do that.
It's unfair for you, and for him.
Suppose you smoke and he doesn't ? Suppose you like to hold hands and he doesn't ? Suppose you're waiting for that good night kiss, and he thinks that'll be a sin ?
Suppose you're in this very crowded restaurant, and he "bows his head in prayer" before eating ?
You don't wanna do that.
Yes you can but he says you are not a Christian so whye waste your time on him! You will finde some one nice man anny way.
Either you are a christian or you are not. Only you know that. If you say you are, then you are.
I understand why you would engage with someone who demeans your beliefs this way...perhaps he's seductive, very interested in you, wants to hear you talk, seems to care very much for you, is focused on you. In other words, he's got your number. He found something in you that he can tap for his own benefit, which is to make you feel doubtful and inferior, thereby increasing his power and control. Where's the future in that?
Don't we all deserve someone to lift us up in communion instead of drag us down in subjugation?
Yes and its best not to talk to strangers online. It would be better if you found a boy you knew and liked, go from there.
No! I think that you should most definitely date me instead! You are certainly the prettiest hubber.
Dude, you gotta do better than that. One thing wrong with that line is - since you're trying to get her to dump a fella she's fallen for, virtually,and date you, just cos you think she's the 'prettiest' wont fly. And also, it totally jeopardizes your chances of making it with another hubber. I mean, you aint gonna be using the prettiest-hubber line again anytime soon.
Yeah or maybe I was just complimenting a girl on her good looks without any ulterior motive? It's not like I can actually date somebody who lives what... 6,000 miles away? internet dating is not for me I am afraid! I prefer at least a little physical contact!
I am also engaged (that happened in Vegas), to a girl that sleeps in my real life bed most nights, so that would probably make things a little difficult too! I don't think that she would take too kindly to me having a 'virtual' girlfriend.
But still, Jenny88 is without a doubt the prettiest girl on here.... especially with her previous pic.
I'am a christian too so I will not try to take sides here bt the word of God says that your are not allowed to marry a non- christian because it may cause some problems in the family for they have different beliefs.
My dad was from a catholic family and my mum was from a church of england family, but my mum and dad were not particularly religious so where is the problem? I was neither christened or baptised, and have grown up as an athiest. Do my grandparents think any less of me? of course not. Personally I think that not accepting somebodies opinions and beliefs and taking them for who they are is a very unchristian thing to do. Remember that 'god' is supposed to love us all? why can worshippers of 'god' apply the same principle and love everybody too?
@Ryan My dad was JW and mom catholic... things didn't work out for them... they got divorced... I was baptised... but now I'm skeptic about "God".. although I still believe in some higher power.
Don't you think its the right time now for you to have a religion and start believing in God. Remember life too short and Don't gamble to be in hell of not believing that God exist. Cheers
Don't you think that its about time for people like you to accept the beliefs of others? I don't go around telling believers that god doesn't exist much in the same way that I don't go around telling 5 year olds on christmas eve that santa claus doesn't exist. Personally I think that finding a religion which I don't really believe in would be a complete waste of my time; it would certainly hinder my adsense earnings. I would also have to alter a lifestyle full of 'sin' which I enjoy far too much, all the name of a book which is difficult to understand.
Not sure how you arrive at the conclusion 'would hinder my adsense earnings ' from ,but I do at least commend you for your expressing your honests thought re the bible, and you do show you at least have some respect for Christ, by not being fake.
Its quite simple really eaglewiki, worshipping god and reading a very long - almost never ending - book takes a lot of time. Time is money, in order to explore religion in depth I would need to read lots, talk lots and critique lots; if I really wanted to become a practicising religious type then this would require some sort of ongoing regime too. Whether that is going to church/mosque or meditating. They all take up time, and my time is already taken up by two blogs, hub pages, applying for postgrad courses and looking for a job. That is my reason for not wanting to explore religion as a concept and is thus probably the same reason I will never be a believer, unless somebody wants to start a religion called 'The Hub of Entrepreunership and Betterment', I would happily join that - as long as I don't have to give 10% of my earnings to it.
it doesn't matter. it's still your decision.
Hi Jen, I am glad you raised this question as it does confuse alot people and arouse alot of emotions.
Let me just say that even Christian whom claim that they are "Christian" are not the best examples of Christians.
Remember (very simply) Jesus sat with the rich, poor, sick, criminals, pharisees and so on. Why? not to Judge them but to spread
the word of God and teach many the error of their ways.
Ok if he is a good Christian and practicing his faith in God he should not be Judging you first and foremost - not his job to.
He should look into your heart. What he should do and is supposed to do is use a common ground which you both have and
encourage you, speak life into you, entice you to want to be, I guess, a practicing Christian. And who knows
a good strong relationship can be create based on faith (faith in Gods word), which is important to serious Christians
to cut things short; check list the below two,
1. Jen if you are Christian are you saved/born again. That is do you accept Jesus Christ as your saviour?
2. Its all about intentions. If your intention is to lead a practicing Christian away from God into a life of sin (and yes, sorry,
it does include sex esp before marriage) then do not go down that road.
Otherwise if good is to come out of the interaction between the both of you, then nothing is wrong with it.
This is a very simplified response to a very complex matter, at which I have seen relationships end in immense heart ache for both parties
involved. Be the relationship Muslim vs Christian, Atheist vs Christian, Christian (non) vs "Christian" the underlying principle remains
the same. I am interested in seeing how you progress feel free to mail me and keep in contact. I love to see relationships work and help create
And remember many are saved, but few are chosen.... God's words
TY. I think we should give ppl a chance before jumping in with a judgement. Half of the time, quite truthfully, I think your opinions and that of Panda's stink. Yet, I know that both of you two probably are highly intelligent and creative, wonderful people even if we have different views.
You're nuts comparing me with that psychopath, Pamda Man.
I have to agree with CJ there , Pamda loves to incite, Cj's more of a challenger but treats me with respect ,but maybe thats because Im a female
CJ is my friend too... But calling somebody "psychopath" not cool.... Gotta be used only for hard core criminals.
You're right. But I always call people who're not really psychopaths, psychopaths. Dont mean to. Just do. Lol. But Pamda Man is weird, though. You gotta admit that much, Jon.
"Weird" is subjective.... for ya I'm "weird" being a Christian.... if I did Budhist meditation.... this world has too many folks... I gotta just look inside... I'm not gonna spend too much time judging others.... unless they're fundamentalists.... spewing hate.
Dude, trust me, I come from the fiery bowels of the heart of Africa - I'm like an expert on weird. Okay, you doubt me. Just read the guy's bio. If you still disagree, then I'll concede. Deal?
There're some folks who take there animal profiles too seriously... can you explain...what exactly you found so "weird"?... if at all there is such a thing as "weird".
Jeez man, I concede. You win. If I cant show you cant see for yourself the weirdness of Pamda Man, I GIVE UP.
Actually I want to marry a christian too. But if it happens that I have a date to non christian maybe its ok in the long run I would convince him to convert to my religion hehe . so now who wants to date me? lols
Dude It isn't a game.... we both can be winners... now I'm acting "weird"?
Oooh, PAMDA man...so full of riddles and fun puzzles to solve.
Oh dude... why is it that everytime you have to get every thread off-topic... Dude, are you a dude? Or are you a dodo? Anyway, I wish you the best of luck in life, dude. I hope you don't overheat, dude.
sorry, forgive me. I only meant both of you are opinionated....not that you have the SAME opinions
I dont advise you, you will always crash, it is better you get someone with similarities
I think he sounded wise to make a choice based on values ,beliefs before either of you got hurt. (thats assuming he was right)
Just look how well the opposites get on in this forum for example
You where asking if a non christian should date a christian? The answer is No .
If a christian dates a non christian then they are only asking for trouble.
No its not. Lol. Every woman ought to date a black man at least once in their life. It broadens their perspective, intellectually...and otherwise.
Urban legends and myths belong in another forum.
ooooo dems is fighting words...im j/k
delete my post Cj , im just playin
Hmmm, did I hear playerhater...Oh yes, I just did.
is the above supposed to be a complementary picture of me...first of all, I'm not thin like that, hell no. Second of all, I would never dress so corny. Black leather jackets are more my thing. Thirdly, I would never pose with a bag like that! What is that Western high school look or what? I'm reaching for a paper bag now, I'm about to throw up. Thanks for messing up my morning, Asherkade. You really are a spot - a friggin' Prince Charming!
Jenny if there is love between two people their religion, colour of skin is irrevelant.
I say go shake your groove.!!!!
Gee whiz, jenny88...do you have something to say to all of this? There's been some good advice offered in your direction.
Psst BP Petal , I answered you re bikini sizes on my hub hehe, did ya get it g/f ,sorry relised later I should have emailed ,but was late an was tired ( excuses...excuses)...
Ok - here's comes the mother in me coming out, but I hate to think of any young woman meeting anyone online and considering actually meeting him in person. It's scary enough when older people meet on sites for that; but young women are the biggest targets for the most common kind of freak.
This person you met may actually be using the Christian thing as an excuse not to date you. Maybe he never had any intentions of dating anybody and it's all been just talk.
Lols actually this my problem now the man who loves me is a protestant while I'm catholic. I don't want to be protestant Just don't know if he wants to be catholic too.
Lisa, I disagree completely.
Jenny, if this person lives too far away for you to meet easily, you should dump him now. A long-distance internet relationship is too fraught with dangers and difficulties to be worth pursuing in the face of obstacles.
If this person lives close enough to meet, you should meet him now. Don't exchange phone numbers, just agree to meet at a coffee shop in a well-frequented area. You can't tell if a person is lying on the internet - you have a much better chance face to face. It will be much easier to discuss all the issues in a real life meeting - and you might find you don't even fancy him anyway!
I would be careful about dating a guy who says he is a really good Christian. My friend goes to church and she has a great amount of interest in the Bible, but her ex broke up with her just because he thought she was not Christian enough for him. I really just found the guy to be too judgemental to be honest. Last year she met a very nice guy that does not seem to have these judgemental tendecies and they are now engaged.
Haha FiercyCj, you were so right.... Jenny88 is not even the one I had the hots for, it was Jenny30.... thought that she looked like 100% different; now I have told the wrong hubber that she is the prettiest
I think the more important question is...are you a Christian. He's not sure, but you don't sound sure either. If you are sure, no problem, the guy's an idiot. But if you're not sure, I think you should pursue that question before you pursue a relationship with a man. That question is a matter of eternity, you should make sure you have it cleared up either way.
Lisa, I'm with Marisa on this one so long as someone -- woman or not -- is prudent in the matter. This is a new era of communication, and many young people are meeting online... in fact it's very common. I met my last girlfriend online, who was 23, and have dated many women thereby. The trouble only comes if someone confuses reality with fantasy, or, what we want not matching up with what is real. That's where naive people can get hurt by not knowing the score. Smart folks investigate, communicate. Victims walk into traps, poor dears.
Jenny, a lot of folks here have spoken with wisdom, while others have, well, just spoken. I think the key is communication -- communication will reveal your compatibility with this person. Marisa pegged it above...
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