Is there ever a good time?
Chicago- Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is
No time like the present
In thirty years of pastoring and counseling, one of the most common questions I encountered was about decision making and more specifically “negative decision” making. These are the kind of anxious questions which build up inside and cause ulcers, lead to heart attacks and the proverbial “nervous breakdown”.
People would come in for a counseling session and want help with making decisions like, “When should I tell my spouse I’ve found someone else?” or “When and how do I tell my boss of twenty years that I am leaving and taking another job?” or “How do I tell my family my unmarried daughter is pregnant”.
The over all question arises, “Is there ever a good time to tell someone something negative?”
The answer is very simple, No, there is never a good time or a right time.
And the follow up to that answer is the proverbial, “There is no time like the present”.
Get it off your chest
As negative as a situation can be, the old adage of “your first impression is probably your best” usually holds true. Most likely, any decision you thought you should make at the very beginning of your negative situation is the best. We often have a tendency (as athletic therapist say) to “over-think or out-think ourselves”. We know what we should do but then back up, re-think, put off our decision and ultimately develop a bigger problem for ourselves than when we started.
People often consider doctors, psychologist and counselors as cold hearted because usually we get straight to the point. We openly, directly and without second guessing tell our patients, you need surgery, it is cancer, you are an addict, it is time you left your spouse and got the divorce, stop fooling yourself you know you should take the new job.
Knowing what you should do and then not doing it is indeed procrastination and it only postpones what is probably the inevitable.
More lives are ruined or put on hold resulting from lack of decision. Lying is also a result of indecisiveness usually leading to more and bigger lies.
The old saying of, “Get it off your chest and you’ll feel better” is really true.
The bible reminds us in 2 Corinthians 6:2 that, “now is the time of God’s favor”; in other words God favors immediacy, He always wants things done right now. If He says wait, wait but more often than not, God says NOW.
So do yourself a favor, feel better and stop putting off till tomorrow what you should do right now.
©Copyright 2011 Dr. Lee W. Outlaw III
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