Amusing football quotes

"The O line was so crisp they should have had freshness dates stamped on their butts."

-Running Back Marcus Sprunk after gaining 192 yards in a game.


"His clipboard holding needed some work."

-Head Coach Bugs McFeely when asked why he didn't put in his backup quarterback during the fourth quarter of a 45-10 blowout.



"He broke his ankle on the last play of the game, but he'll be OK. He has another one."

-Head Coach Bugs McFeely when asked about ths condition of an injured player.


"I told him to rub some dirt on it and get back in there, then I realized we were playin' on artificial turf."

-Head Coach Bugs McFeely when asked about a minor injury suffered by one of his players.


"It was a big win for us and it put us exactly where we want to be at this point in the season - back in the locker room making sure that no one stole our bling during the game."

-Defensive Nose Tackle Andrew Shortshanks after a particularly satisfying victory.


"I love this game! I love this game! Not in the kissy way, but in a manly life-affirming kind of way!"

-Defensive Back Herman Williams after a game winning interception.


"We made some bad plays, but they came at good time, so our bad memories will make us feel good about ourselves going into next week."

-Defensive Back Josiah Average, looking back on his last few games.


"Our defense is like a computer: it's quick, complicated, and powerful, and I'm looking forward to upgrading it next season."

- Defensive Line Coach Tank MacNamara

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Comments 4 comments

Aya Katz profile image

Aya Katz 7 years ago from The Ozarks

Nicomp, did you publish this hub twice? It appeared twice in the hubtivity!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 7 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Aya Katz: Nope, I published it once. I don't want to get banned again. I still don't know what I did the first time. :)


drcrischasse profile image

drcrischasse 7 years ago from NH/Foxboro

Funny stuff!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 7 years ago

Thanks for starting my day with a laugh.

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