Will Someone Please Explain Fake Eyeglasses To Me?

JOHN LENNON IS LIVING PROOF

OF MY QUESTION OF WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF FAKE EYEGLASSES?
OF MY QUESTION OF WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF FAKE EYEGLASSES?

MORE IMAGES OF FAKE EYEGLASSES

THIS PRETTY GIRL COULDN'T AFFORD FAKE EYEGLASSES, SO SHE IMPROVISED BY USING HER FINGERS.
THIS PRETTY GIRL COULDN'T AFFORD FAKE EYEGLASSES, SO SHE IMPROVISED BY USING HER FINGERS.
NO, BUDDY, WEARING AN UNSHAVEN FACE AND FAKE EYEGLASSES DOES NOT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A GENIUS.
NO, BUDDY, WEARING AN UNSHAVEN FACE AND FAKE EYEGLASSES DOES NOT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A GENIUS.
JOHN LENNON LOOKING DEPRESSED. GUESS WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES CAN DO THAT TO EVEN THE MOST CREATIVE MUSICAL GENIUS, HUH?
JOHN LENNON LOOKING DEPRESSED. GUESS WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES CAN DO THAT TO EVEN THE MOST CREATIVE MUSICAL GENIUS, HUH?
THIS IS JOHN LENNON WITH "REAL" SUN SHADES. THIS IS FINE. AT LEAST THE SHADES SERVE A PURPOSE.
THIS IS JOHN LENNON WITH "REAL" SUN SHADES. THIS IS FINE. AT LEAST THE SHADES SERVE A PURPOSE.
THIS POOR DOG HAS TO ENDURE THE SHAME OF WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES.
THIS POOR DOG HAS TO ENDURE THE SHAME OF WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES.

I loved John Lennon

as well as the rest of the "cosmically-talented" Beatles. Who didn't? I grew up with the Beatles. Loved their songs. Albums. And the off-beat movies they produced. To me, life was never the same when they decided that they had enough fame and money and it was time to split-up leaving us, the Beatle fans shocked, depressed and not able to eat solid food for a week. Yeah, that was a very caring move, guys.

Toward the end of the Beatles' careers, I had a problem that started out as a minor annoyance and over the course of time, it grew into an aggravating sore in my soul that never healed. It wasn't how Yoko Ono supposedly helped to break-up the greatest band of all-time. It wasn't the Beatles visit with a guru to learn inner-peace. It was, of all things senseless, John Lennon's choice of wearing fake eyeglasses.

That's right. Fake eyeglasses. Did you ever notice that the eyeglasses with circular, gold rims Lennon sported in photos, public and in protests for peace, were fake? Where were your heads, people? I saw it. And didn't like it. Still don't like it. And if I live to see 78, I still won't like it.

I can still see photos of Lennon on-line when I am doing research for hubs, and this same old pestering, burning question of, "why did you wear fake eyeglasses, John?" simply won't go away. It sticks its ugly head up. Looks around. And chuckles to itself and seeps back inside of me to come out again another day.

I'm not being anti-Lennon. Don't be mislead. I love John Lennon and his works as much as the next fella, but this one area of his image I still do not understand. The burning-urge to be seen in fake eyeglasses.

Yes, I could easily-understand his addiction to fake glass, but come on. Even Beethoven in his off-center idiocyncries, wasn't this far over the edge. I guess John and need to wear fake eyeglasses was his way of being a complexity, a musical mystery and a book unread when he left us that one fatal Monday night in front of his apartment building.

Here is a short-list of famous people who DIDN'T wear fake eyeglasses, but were as famous as John Lennon . . .

  • Jimi Hendrix (sunglasses, even while sober)
  • Eric Clapton (aviator sunglasses)
  • Mary Ann Faithful (Mick Jagger of the Rolling Stones, girlfriend)
  • Jim Morrison ("granny" glasses--bi-focals)
  • John Croce (regular sunglasses)
  • Buddy Holly (his eyeglasses were REAL)
  • Marty Balin (Jefferson Airplane)
  • Janis Joplin (she only wore huge sunglasses)

You see, my friends, not everyone wore fake eyeglasses to keep their "flame of fame" burning either in the music or movie industry. But I am just concentating on the music industry in his hub. Now here is a short-list of famous people who DID wear the occasional pair of fake eyeglasses while enjoying their massive amount of fame . . .

  • Dick Cavett (talk show host on ABC)
  • Roger Moore (once married to actress Ann-Margaret)
  • Mike Nesmith (of the Monkees)
  • Robert Vaughn (Man from U.N.C.L.E.)
  • Dr. Spock (child-rearing expert)
  • Leonard Nimoy (do I really have to tell you what he did on television?
  • Werner Klemperer (Col. Klink, Hogan's Heroes)
  • Frank Zappa (musical genius, Mothers of Invention

Back to fake eyeglasses and my overall point is this. Why wear fake eyeglasses, or anything fake, if it doesn't work? Were the famous men and women who wore fake eyeglasse "more" famous than regular celebrites who didn't embarrass themselves with fake eyeglasses? Did the celebrities who wore fake eyeglasses have better vision? I don't see how when the glass their eyes looked through was regular, garden-variety glass. No amplification of vision. No "eyes like a hawk," when wearing fake eyeglasses. Just for the sheer pleasure of telling you and I, "Heyyyy, look at me! I am very famous. I wear fake eyeglasses," that is all I can deduce.

To me . . .fake eyeglasses were as useful as:

  • Icemakers to Eskimos
  • White paint to ghosts
  • Hot air to the sun
  • Two extra strings on a six-string guitar
  • Turbo-Boost built into a rabbit
  • Red Cross blood bank to Count Dracula
  • "My" corny one-liners to George Carlin
  • Laziness to a stubborn mule

and I could tell you more, but I think that I have made my point in a convincing manner. The only way to make a point. I like to "leave it on the hub," when I am making my point about the subject I am talking about.

Here are the only reasons that I find that are remotely-feasible for celebrities wearing fake eyeglasses . . .

  • To be cool
  • To stand out from the crowd--even their own celebrity crowd
  • Insecurities
  • Wanting to hide behind something
  • To be novel. Unique
  • To be talked about by people such as myself
  • To make a statement, "I made it in the music or show business."
  • Most every celebrity was doing this to protest the Vietnam War

Not everyone could wear fake eyeglasses. Not everyone was geared to wear these "items of vanity" that only took up space on some celebrities' eyes. It took someone with guts, nerve and an independent spirit to face ridicule and fun-making because of their love for fake eyeglasses.

Taking the first item on the above list, 'To be cool," I wanted to share with you, a would-be interview with an illusive, reclusive and ultra-cool man who wouldn't go out without his fake eyeglasses.

ME: Hi. Thank you for your time to allow me to ask you one question.

COOL MAN: Oh, uhhh, yeah, man. No sweat.

ME: My one and only question to you is . . .why do you wear fake eyeglasses?

COOL MAN: Oh, ha, ha, well you see, I am making a personal statement against "the establishment," and "the man," on how I, and very-famous people such as myself, cannot stand the Vietnam War. That's why, my good man.

ME: Okay. cool, but how is that helping to stop the Vietnam War?

COOL MAN: Well, I see it like this, man. The Viet Cong will get word of us, the super-famous celebrities of music and movies in the states and see how unmoved and fearless our "unreal" eyeglasses make us look that they will be demoralized and give up.

ME: Oh, don't you mean, "fake" eyeglasses instead of "unreal"?

COOL MAN: Ha, ha, well, yeah, man. Same difference. Don't you think that wearing "fake" eyeglasses makes me look cool, laid-back and oblivious to violence, such as in the Vietnam War?

ME: Not really. To me, you look like someone trying to masquerade yourself from someone, or something.

COOL MAN: Uhhh, well, hey, I don't do that many drugs, man. I just want to "look" like I am a member in good standing with the "in crowd." And . . .and . . .hey, man, even my purebred poodle wears fake eyeglasses . . .don't tell any of my celebrity friends I used the word "fake."

ME: I won't, and that song, "The In Crowd," Ramsey Lewis released that song. And DIDN'T wear fake eyeglasses.

COOL MAN: (gulp), I got to split, man. "Aquarius," my purebred poodle needs to urinate.

Here is what people who (used to) wear fake eyeglasses looked like when appearing in public:

  • Childish (playing make-believe)
  • Pretentious
  • Condescending
  • Self-absorbed
  • Above regular people
  • Arrogant
  • Stupid (for wearing an item that did NOT work)
  • Following the crowd

And before I shut this hub down, I want to give you a "surprise list" of famous people who wouldn't look good at all if they wore fake eyeglasses . . .

  • Nancy Pelosi (former Speaker of The House)
  • Barbara Walters
  • Vice-president, Joe Biden
  • Meg Ryan
  • Jonah Hill (co-star of "22 Jump Street")
  • Mike Wallace (CBS 60 Minutes)
  • Sister Teresa
  • Lady GaGa (on second thought, who'd know if she were wearing fake eyeglasses?)

Maybe I am too old fashioned. Maybe I am behind the times. And maybe I am "out of the loop," but I was raised to believe that we were only to use things that were made to be used to benefit our society, health, peace of mind and overall well-being.

But wearing fake eyeglasses? They simply do not work, dude. Why bother putting on a pair of eyeglasses that you know ahead of time are FAKE?

It's very similar to reading a fake hub, written by a fake hub writer.

Not very interesting.





EVEN THIS LOVELY GIRL

HAS BEEN "SUCKERED-IN" TO THE IDEA THAT WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES IS COOL. AND SEXY. MAYBE BOTH.
HAS BEEN "SUCKERED-IN" TO THE IDEA THAT WEARING FAKE EYEGLASSES IS COOL. AND SEXY. MAYBE BOTH.

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Comments 32 comments

hoteltravel profile image

hoteltravel 4 years ago from Thailand

Kenneth, you made your point very convincingly and I agree wholeheartedly with you. When people who need real glasses are wearing contacts to look good, why would a sane person wear fake ones to look cool? I would go with your reasons 'insecurities' and 'wanting to hide behind something'. May be they do not love their looks and want to keep it hidden. The interview with the 'Cool Man' is too good. Voted all the way up and funny.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

Ken,

Nothing makes s ense anymore so let's not be surprised about fake glasses, boobs, or hair! I could go on and on, but I'll spare you the agony.


MsLainieP profile image

MsLainieP 4 years ago from Chicago

I've known two people who used fake glasses in self-defense: The first was a very good looking young man who was the subject of many a schoolgirl crush at the junior high school where he taught. He thought that the glasses made him look older. The second was a young woman who was tired of being harassed by men on the train. The glasses helped prevent scary encounters.


Thundermama profile image

Thundermama 4 years ago from Canada

What the heck? Lennon's glasses were fake? I feel so confused. I thoroughly enjoyed this kooky hub.


jenubouka 4 years ago

Yes, and Yes. Thank You Kenneth, how true are your antics and rants about this crazy trend. Have you seen the ones that take OUT the fake glass and just wear the rims? Why on earth would possess some one think that is cool? Do any of these cooks realize those who wear glasses wish they didn't and perhaps you are making mockery of it? Whadda ya gonna do when you DO need glasses and have a bunch of useless one lying around? Explain that to HMO!! Okay...I am done, as you can see I loved your hub~!


Sueswan 4 years ago

Dearest Kenneth,

"COOL MAN: (gulp), I got to split, man. "Aquarius," my purebred poodle needs to urinate." LMAO. I am glad that I went to the bathroom before I read this.

I would have love to see your corny one liners to George Carlin. George was one of the best comedians in my opinion.

I do not understand people who wear fake glasses. I wore real glasses for almost thirty years and I always felt self conscious. March 31st will be one year since I had Lazik eye surgery. Best thing I ever did for myself.

Voted up up and away!

Take care and have a great weekend :)


catgypsy profile image

catgypsy 4 years ago from the South

Wow, I didn't know they were fake! Very interesting.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, hoteltravel,

and THANK YOU, buddy, for that supportive comment. "Cool Man," notwithstanding, fake eyeglasses to me, say, "Im wealthy. Powerful and YOU are not," talking to ME. I should have mentioned my friend, Edward, his true name, I knew in 1992. He had visions of being a male model. Oh, I credit him. He was in great shape, had "that" look and wore fake eyeglasses. Poor man. He paid an "agency" $500.00 to book with them. Wait for it. Yes, you got it too. He called me at the newspaper to report that he had "made it" with an agency and would we write a feature story for him. I asked where he was and he said in a phone booth in Los Angeles across the street from the agency. I knew something was up when Edward said, "Ken, I cannot figure this. The doors are all locked up; phones sitting on the floor; desks are gone; no one in the office at 10 a.m., L.A. time, and after I paid them $500.00 cash to book me in shows," I asked, "Edward, buddy, did they not tell you that YOU are the one to be paid, not them?" Sounded like he was crying as he hung up. Now, according to reports, he is happy with is wife and children in some locale in Florida where he is a massage therapist. Another piece of the grand scheme puzzle.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, breakfastpop,

Thanks so much for your sweet comment. And you know what? I am going to publish a future hub about Fake boobs and other luxuries of life....and dedicate it to YOU! Thanks for the idea, my dear friend.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

MsLainieP, I agree with your stance on fake eyeglasses. I never dreamed of them as self-defense tools. Thanks for shedding light on that for me. And I wish you would be one of my FOLLOWERS so we could stay in touch. I admire your candor and boldness of comment. I really do.

Sincerely, KENNETH


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

ThunderMama, yep. Fake. And thick as well. And "some" of the Beatle recordings were "faked" that is, John's part of the song, he would come into the studio and sing his part. Alone because none of the other Beatles like Ono, and leave. The other 3 would record with a Fake JOHN on tape. John was extemely-sensitive too. Maybe this explained him wearing fake eyeglasses.

Hey, ThunderMama, why don't you be one of my followers? That would be cool.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Jenu, where have YOU been? Ive missed you. And it seems like old times with you commenting on a rantive hub of mine. Thanks for bringing a ray of sunshine to my life today, March 26, 2012.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dearest Susan,

"Thank YOU, DEAR FRIEND, for the lovely comments, thoughts, and votes. I appreciate you very much, Susan, and I want you to always know that too." Next time you may not make it to the facilities. Just be advised. And have a great day!

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear catgypsy, yes, they were fake. I too was saddened when I learned this years back. That's why (THEN) I had trust issues. Not as much now. With age comes, well you know the rest.

Thanks for the sweet comment.

Kenneth


MsLainieP profile image

MsLainieP 4 years ago from Chicago

Kenneth: As far as I can tell, I am a follower!

Take care.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear MsLainieP . . .thank you so much. You are a gem. And I will take care, but you got to do the same. Enjoy the sunshine and laugh some today.

Kenneth


MsDora profile image

MsDora 4 years ago from The Caribbean

Kenneth, I didn't think anyone could say/write so much about fake eye glasses. Andy Rooney reading this. Really great job!


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

MsDora, you are a GENIUNE blessing. Thank you for your sweet comments. May God bless you richly and have a peaceful Easter Sunday.

Kenneth


What's the problem? 4 years ago

I wear fake glasses because my eyes are set rather close-together and glasses make my face look better proportioned. I discovered this when I had to wear glasses as part of a costume. Other girls wear makeup; I wear glasses. Why should I have to wait around for presbyopia?


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, What's the problem? I understand completely, YOUR reason for fake glasses. What I do not get is mostly famous people with 20/20 vision who could see a gnat on a pinhead 100 yards away wearing fake glasses on talk shows and book tours. I mean, they are good looking enough without the glasses, so what is the point?

Thanks for making me SEE your side of this issue.

Kenneth


chrissy 4 years ago

did you really feel the need to rant about this? i think fake glasses look cute :)


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear chrissy, actually, no. I didn't think I was ranting, but I respect your opinion and will die defending your right to disagree.

Thanks for your input, and to show you that I can compromise, yes, ON SOME people fake glasses are cute, but not on people with a SELF-ABSORBED attitude.

I said when I started writing for hubs that I would take the good and not so sweet comments. Thanks for your comment being in opposition to my thoughts, and yet so intelligent and non-profane. I appreciate that.

Kenneth


Snurre profile image

Snurre 4 years ago

I hate fake glasses. Maybe that's because I love my non-fake glasses and I appreciate them because they help me see well. OK, they are also a great fashion accessory, but I wouldn't dream about wearing fake glasses.

Regarding Lennon, they do look fake, yeah. But supposedly he has bad eyes. Not sure why his glasses look fake because they are supposed to be real ones. Or maybe him having myopia is a big lie. You never know. Anyway, I really enjoyed reading this hub.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Snurre,

thank you, dear friend, for your comment on fake glasses. I never knew that Lennon had bad eyes, but I learned that from you. Thanks.

I guess my dislike for REAL fake glasses (a paradox) was because of an old friend, Edward, a would-be male fashion model. Oh, I give Ed all the credit in the world. He had the looks, attitude, and first to wear "bed head" hairstyle, but had PERFECT vision and chose to look oh so cool with his collar up, shirt out, hair gelled, and wearing fake eyeglasses. Why???? If you have it ALL, by tampering with the formula of success.

He lives in Florida now. He is a massage therapist. Married, I guess. With kids. Again, I guess. We haven't talked since 1992.

Shurre, visit me anytime you like.

Kenneth


mjwm 4 years ago

Lennon was well-known to be severely myopic (near-sighted). Early in his career he either toughed it out in public without glasses or wore contacts (glass! back then). When he started wearing glasses full-time, he very likely posed for photos with fake lenses so his eyes wouldn't look small and piggy.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, mjwm,

and thank you for your wisdom about this area of Lennon's life that has puzzled me for years. I appreciate you sharing that with me.

Kenneth


Nicolai 4 years ago

Fake glasses are more of a fashion accessory than anything. Sort of like necklaces or rings, or even makeup. It's fine to hate hipsters and other unfavorable d-bags who are generally overall pretentious. But I actually think glasses are attractive on some people. But hey, everybody's got different tastes.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Nicholai . . .I agree with you. Guess that the "purist," in me comes out too much. Thanks for the comment. I understand more about fake glasses now, thanks to you.

Kenneth


Danny 4 years ago

I agree with Nicolai. I really don't see what the big deal is. I've always wanted to have glasses but I have perfect eyesight so I finally bought a pair of yes, fake glasses. They are just an accessory like the rest though. It'd be like caring that someone is wearing jewelry or highlighting one's hair. Sure they're not necessary, but rather fun. They change things up a bit. Cheers man!

-Danny


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

@ both Danny and Nicholai . . .and the rest of the ones who left comments on THIS subject:

"Thank you all, sincerely, for giving me a needed-education in fashion accessorizing. I mean that. I now have the understanding that I need to live a less-cluttered life. IOU all big time."

KENNETH


johnny luna 4 years ago

why wear a necklace? why wear earrings? why wear rings? these are all simply accessories to make the wearer feel more attractive in their own perception of themselves. fake glasses are no different, they are simply an accessory, and nothing more. who are you bunch of douchebags to determine what fashion is better than others? yeesh, i can't wait until im such a pillar of fashion that i can lash out at somebody else because of an accessory they choose, because that's not a sixth grade mentality or anything...you guys are super.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Johnny,

you have several legitimate points of which I agree with on the necklaces, earrings and even rings. These are accessories. But as for ME, personally, I couldn't see myself wearing fake eyeglasses. And as for your comment of "us," being douchebags, there is no "us," just me. I am the author of this hub. And this was only a humorous-attempt to get one of my questions answered.

And you did that quite colorfully.

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