Swimsuit season: How to fit your bathing suit

Wikimedia Commons. "Venus at the a Mirror", Rubens.  You are as pretty as this Venus. Yes, YOU are, not your bathing suit!
Wikimedia Commons. "Venus at the a Mirror", Rubens. You are as pretty as this Venus. Yes, YOU are, not your bathing suit!

Ladies, swimsuit season approaches, and I'm here to tell you that you don't have to panic. Why?

First of all, if you are really persuaded that it's you who needs to fit in your bikini as opposed to the other way round, then you can use our good friend Google to find infinity of ways to shape your body for public airing. There are multitude of articles on sit ups, curl downs, squats, leg extensions, all aimed at training and fitting your hips, glutes, tights, tummy and what not.

But that isn't really and truly why you don't need to panic. The real reason is because you don't need to fit your bathing suit, your bathing suit needs to fit YOU!

Ladies, you are perfect just the way you are. If I've said it ten times, or one hundred: Stop looking at your body as if it's an outer space alien, stop frowning at your assets (alert: frowning causes wrinkles!), and, most important, stop thinking the world is right and your body is wrong.

You've got it all, ladies! A fabulous body and a glorious smile, and that's why you don't need to panic about swimsuit season.

Wikimedia Commons. "The Three Graces", Rubens. Aren't they beautiful?
Wikimedia Commons. "The Three Graces", Rubens. Aren't they beautiful?

Choose a bathing suit that fits you!

The best way to fit your bathing suit is to find the right bathing suit for you. You need to be clear on a few things before you undertake the search of the perfect piece for you. Number one: There are no or very few perfect bodies! Each body is different and we all have to deal with some basics to choose pampering swimwear.

You think I jest? Since you're so intent on running a Google search to torture yourself adapting your body to that bikini you wore post graduating, then you won't mind running a Google search to find how much good advice there is to find a fitting swimsuit for you. Here are some examples:

Go on, click on any of this or do your own Google search, if you still aren't convinced.

One-Piece or Two-Piece Swimsuit?

If you're thinking your tummy could use some sit ups, and that you've got bigger love handles than you'd like to show the world (love handles are private business anyway), then maybe you want to consider a one-piece bathing suit.

This is nothing to be ashamed of, one-pieces reveal enough to make you interesting, and hide enough to make you feel secure. You still can and should feel sexy if you pick a one-piece bathing suit that shows all your back right down to the bikini line, while it protects your tummy from prying eyes.

If you are a generously endowed lady, my advice for you is that you choose a low scooped one-piece bathing suit that shows off your cleavage. If you are well endowed and settle for this strategy, you can be 100% certain that no one will be looking at your tummy anyway! Honest to goodness, and no joke.

Regardless, be advised to pick your size, don't try to fit your body into a size that's adequate for your arm at best. That is the surest way to feel bad about yourself, because you'll be squeezed and will feel like you have way too much flesh. You don't! Just please choose a size that fits you and, yes, stop thinking YOU have got to fit any given size.

Willendorf Venus, the most famous of all steatopygian venuses.
Willendorf Venus, the most famous of all steatopygian venuses.

Still, you'd rather use a two-piece?

Absolutely, and I'm so proud of you! So if you do want to air your tummy and those cute love handles, you just need to consider your body structure to pick a flattering bikini.

Big on top: First of all you want to cover yourself, it's not nice when your two big friends decide they want to take a bath without your permission!

If you're well endowed, I recommend you get away from strapless tops. Your most favoring tops will probably be tied on the neck because they provide better support and help push up your assets.

Ideally, you also wear an underwired top for maximum support. Your assets are very nice to see if they stay in place, we don't want them to cover your tummy! I mean, if you want to cover your tummy, that's all right, just go back to pick a one-piece bathing suit!

Now, don't be tempted by those tops that are reinforced with foam cups. You don't need the extra padding, you have it all yourself, just show it off!

Big on the hips or bottom: First of all, avoid the dire temptation to wear boy shorts. You think they are hiding what you don't want to show, but they are actually calling attention to it by making it bigger! Seriously, shorts are a no no.

Mini-skirt bikini bottoms are OK, however, because they flow with movement and don't stick to every inch of your hips and bottom. Mini skirts are coquettish and modest, and only show what you want to show.

In any case, if you really think you are big on the hips, my best advice is that you reconsider the bikini pursuit and settle instead for a one-piece bathing suit. In your case, a one color piece with a low neckline and straight leg cut will likely create top to bottom continuity and balance your figure in a way your hips aren't the only protagonists.

You still want a bikini? I commend you for your self assuredness, just bear these two things in mind:

1. Choose a solid color, on the darker side. Don't pick a multicolored bikini, especially not one with flowery or round shapes on it, as these patterns increase volume.

Solid colors, instead, contain general volume perception on the eye of the beholder. If they are darker (navy, brown, dark green, you know the drill), you'll simply feel like you are less of a spot to be looked at. Big hips on a red or orange bottom appear bigger than they really are, and while you're happy with your body, you can still pick a favoring bathing suit.

2. Avoid bottoms with lots of adornments and details at the hips. Pick a simple line that doesn't increase volume.

The Turkish Batch, by Ingres. Look at how sexy that tummy is, and how unashamed its owner poses!
The Turkish Batch, by Ingres. Look at how sexy that tummy is, and how unashamed its owner poses!

Big tummy: You know you have to avoid those tiny little nothings of bikinis, no big secret here. What you can go for is a tankini, very much in today, where the bottom is just the same as any bikini but the top resembles a sexy t-shirt. This is probably your best alternative to a one-piece bathing suit if you're slightly self conscious about your cute tummy but still want to be sexily daring in a two-piece.

A word for the plus size figure

Painting from "The Beach" series, by Botero. It's simply delicious!
Painting from "The Beach" series, by Botero. It's simply delicious!

Don't go thinking that you can't be fabulously sexy with your swimwear, you can too, showing a bit of skin in the right places will make you feel like a million bucks. Here is what will best fit you, and don't worry anymore about YOU having to fit into anything:

You will look your best in one-piece swimsuits, but don't think they need to cover all of you, don't make the mistake of hiding it all! You will want to reveal some of your assets, and you can do that with low, vertical necklines that lengthen your image. A sarong over your hips may give you confidence and even add a touch of glamour.

You want to wear a piece that is well reinforced, do avoid at all costs flimsy fabrics that make your body shag, use fabrics that keep all of you together and proudly so. There are swimsuits with panels either on front or on the sides, and those are ideal for you.

Colors are important for you, too. You need to pick dark and cool colors, we already went over the volume effect of bright, warm colors. Excess of decoration on your bathing suit is not a good idea for you, as this also increases volume. For you, solid colors are best.

Dove, Campaign for Real Beauty. Folks at Dove got it right, in my opinion. Real women are really beautiful!
Dove, Campaign for Real Beauty. Folks at Dove got it right, in my opinion. Real women are really beautiful!

Really, ladies, you are fabulous the way you are

I've seen way too many women seriously unhappy with their bodies, and that saddens me to no end. Life is too short to be fretting about what all these Photoshop enhanced magazines say is the right thing. If it were so right, they wouldn't need Photoshop, to begin with.

Don't try to Photoshop yourself into what others think your image should be, and learn to love yourself for the beautiful woman that you are. There is a perfect swimsuit out there for you!

More by this Author


Comments 25 comments

Linda Myshrall 6 years ago

Wow! This is excellent and so tasteful, with real (and accurate) advice about how to choose a swimsuit. You've found yourself an appreciative audience here. Hooray for the guy who doesn't trot out a picture of Pamela Anderson in a swimsuit then suggest that we mere mortals will look great in the same thing. Well done, Linda


carmenph profile image

carmenph 6 years ago from Philippines

You nailed it with this statement: "you don't need to fit your bathing suit, your bathing suit needs to fit YOU!" I can't agree more.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

Hello to you, ladies!

Linda, the day I wave a picture of Ms Anderson as an example for anything, it will probably be what NOT to do to oneself! :) To each their own, they do say, so I won't criticize, but I at least appreciate the opportunity to make the point that women don't need to play the photoshop game to be beautiful, and feel beautiful :)

Carmen, I'm glad you agree ;-)


Enelle Lamb profile image

Enelle Lamb 6 years ago from Canada's 'California'

You have no idea how refreshing this hub is! Thank you from all of us 'slightly round' women :D I loved your choice of pictures - well done Buffoon!


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

Hello Enelle, glad you approve and I'm ticked that you commented on my choice of images :) I find them beautiful and very tasteful, and I did want to make a "subliminal" point that today's surrealistic ideal of beauty is not necessarily THE right thing, especially not if and when it makes women feel bad about themselves. I hope you enjoy the swimsuit season :)


Enelle Lamb profile image

Enelle Lamb 6 years ago from Canada's 'California'

Somehow I think I'll be sticking with a tankini ;) they look great on voluptuous women :D


MPG Narratives profile image

MPG Narratives 6 years ago from Sydney, Australia

"Really, ladies, you are fabulous the way you are"... hmmm but how many of us believe this statement. Thanks for a great article and welcome to hubpages.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

MPG, I don't know how many women believe it, but I do know how many should: ALL of you! And thank you kindly for your comment and the welcome :-)


europewalker profile image

europewalker 6 years ago

Really good hub!


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

I appreciate your saying so, europewalker *g*


Cheeky Girl profile image

Cheeky Girl 6 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

I think Photoshop makes the best bikinis, you always look great in them! No matter even if it's raining or snowing, as Photoshop just gets it to look great in the end! LOL! Okay, I am being silly, of course. I prefer he 2 piece bikini, as I want to get as much sun on me as humanly possible without stripping.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

Cheeky Girl, you're so right about Photoshop :) maybe the way to fit one's bathing suit is Photoshop it all over oneself? :-P Now who's being silly? *L* Cheers for making me giggle!


Daringest 6 years ago

"Have you ever stopped to imagine..."

You have such a double standard when it comes to swimwear for men versus women. Now I see why you hate men who wear swimbriefs and form fitting swimwear so much. Your view that all women are fabulous the way [they] are, but that the man who should wear a swim brief barely exists, is an example of your sexism.

Perhaps you're just upset than men usually don't have cellulite, saddlebags, vericose veins, "cute love handles" and all the other "fabulous" things men have to look at when we visit a pool or beach. So you bully men into to covering up and encourage every women to wear whatever and as little as she wants to perpetuate your misandrist, sexist illusions.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 6 years ago Author

Who pissed on your coffee dude! HAHAHAHA


late to the show, again 4 years ago

Daringest, if a man's package can "fit" into one of those "form fitting swim briefs" then he really should be covering up. Oops did I really say that? How unlady-like of me. In my experience women, in general, are entirely to self -conscious about their appearance and men aren't enough.

You keep it up Buffoon. Women everywhere need to be reminded that they are beautiful just the way God made them.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 4 years ago Author

Coolest handle there, too late to show, again! This buffoon is tickled :) I think you're right, too. Women tend to be too self conscious while men are glaringly NOT enough! Cheers to you for making my day start with a smile!


Richelle 2 years ago

If you use the right suit you can look fantastic what ever your size is, and most women do just that. Keep it up we are looking good.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 2 years ago Author

Well said, Richelle! I wish you the best swimsuit season!


Loukia Lemos profile image

Loukia Lemos 2 years ago from Athens, Greece

so easy to read and made me feel bikini confident in no time!!!!


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 2 years ago Author

That's all my pleasure then, Loukia! Glad to be of assistance :)


Daringest 18 months ago

Try using the same "sense of humor" use used in your rant against men wearing sensible swimwear. What's sad is how those with such hypocrisy and ugliness can live with themselves. And, your juvenile responses don't do anything defend your article.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 18 months ago Author

Lighten up! You'll live longer! :D


Richelle 17 months ago

Thanks for some of the hints on finding a suit that makes you look good. You gave a lot of good advice, and I'm going to try and put some of it to good use this season.


Richelle 17 months ago

Thanks for some of the hints on finding a suit that makes you look good. You gave a lot of good advice, and I'm going to try and put some of it to good use this season.


Buffoon profile image

Buffoon 17 months ago Author

Very glad to be of help, Richelle! I'm sure you'll look dashing this season! :)

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working