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What Real Women Are “Under Wearing”

Updated on October 13, 2009

This link was referred to me by Cyndie D, and I love it. It's a piece by Her Room, a on online lingerie retailer and it's essentially a peep show under everyday attire that demonstrates what lingerie women are wearing.

Go have a look, then pop back here, I have observations to make!

The first thing I notice is that all these women are trapped in some dystopian office where knee length pencil skirts and white blouses are the order of the day. For the sake of making the promotion look tidy, I'll accept a certain uniformity of outerwear without too much whining.

However, once I mouse over the women, and get over my temporary glee that they've actually used a range of 'real' body types to model their lingerie, as opposed to the ridiculous lingerie models they usually use, who I am sorry, almost always have a pre-pubescent body shape. That ultra flat stomach every panty model has? Either photo shopped to hell and back, or being worn by someone who has yet to gain her fully mature figure. Most every woman I have ever seen in real life has something of a little belly, even the supermodels have a tiny little curve before their stomachs hit their crotches, but no, not these lingerie models, they've somehow bypassed that genetic aspect of being female.

But I digress, and do so heavily because I note, to my utter horror, that these women have allegedly all chosen of their own free will to wear what can only be described as beige bras. There's one which could be described as off-white and the rest are so boring and plain as to be 'oh no, I'm becoming an emo just looking at them' depressing.

The fact that they let one of the women wear vertical striped pantyhose and the other (the short one, of course, wear horizontally striped pantyhose,) does not change the fact that Her Room apparently believes that real women are utterly devoid of imagination when it comes to lingerie and if left to their own devices will default to beige.

They've done several series like this, and in many of them beige rules the day. Even the 'party dresses' piece advocates a grotesque beige bra and panty set as if that's going to look great when you get home with your hot date, assuming he is blind.

I'm aware that the point of this lingerie is probably the fact that it makes their outerwear look good, but I'm also well aware from personal experience that it is quite possible not to wear lingerie designed in the tombs of the terminally dull, to look feminine under clothing and still look quite presentable on the outside.

In short, though I love the idea and much of its execution, its riling to see the sheer lack of imagination and creativity at work here. I've never, ever bought a beige anything, and though I concede that evidently other women have done (otherwise this horrific parade of dull would not be sullying my screen as I type,) I refuse to believe that the majority of women in the world choose beige on a regular basis.

I also refuse to believe that any woman would be happy with her pantyhose cinching around her waist like that, let's face it, we all shrug them down to our hips where there is bone to support them and the elastic is not left to slowly assault our delicate internal organs.

In other words, creativity and passion seems to have taken a back seat to the bland illusion of comfort, a trade off which is neither appealing or necessary.

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