50 Facebook Statuses About Your Personality

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When you want to update your status Facebook asks you, "What's on your mind?". Because social networking has made this generation "Look at me! I'm interesting!! LOOK OVER HERE!!!!!" we use this as a way to do just that, along with updating our "friends".

A lot of us enjoy posting fun and witty statuses because, why does Mark Zuckerberg need to know about our personal life. But if you want to tell Facebook about your personality, here are 50 Facebook statuses about some personality traits!


Blunt / Tell It Like It Is:

  • If you don't like my opinion, here's a straw. Suck a fart out of my ass!
  • I think my pessimism and general cynicism is due to the fact that I have enough intelligence to notice the idiocity in the world around me.
  • Someone once told me I have diarrhea of the mouth and I told them: "Well at least I don't have constipation of the brain, like you."
  • Don't like what I say? Well, let me build a bridge so you can get over it!
  • Agrees that some things are better left unsaid. But I'm going to say them anyway!


Hot-Temper / Bitchy:

  • I'm not evil and vindictive. I'm just angry and violent.
  • I lack patience for people who try to outsmart common sense because then I have to give them credit for being a bigger ass than I originally would have thought!
  • Which shade of Bitch am I today? Push me to find out!
  • I'm a bitch. I'm a lover. I can't be without the other.
  • I don't have an attitude problem. YOU have a problem with my attitude!
  • I'm 10 times the bitch on my best day than you are on your worst.
  • I'm not trying to be difficult. It just comes naturally.
  • I'm a really nice person, but don't underestimate my Inner Warrior when I'm pushed to the point.
  • My manager wanted to see me to an Angry Management course, so I told them I was already angry with management.


Moody:

  • Mood of the day: Cranky, with a chance of restlessness, and scattered mood swings later in the afternoon.
  • Do they still get mood rings? I should get one. It could act as a warning signal for others.
  • Is conducting a test to see how moods I can hit in a 24 hour period. Consider yourself warned.
  • First I was like: BLAHHHH! Then I was like: WHEEE! Then I was like: Ehhhhhhh. Damn mood swings.


Lazy / Slob:

  • No, my house is not perfectly clean. But it sure is perfectly lived in!
  • Procrastinators unite! Tomorrow.
  • A clean house is a sound of an unlived life.
  • Decided that I'm not lazy, I'm simply resting before I get tired.
  • Okay, I'm really trying to get motivated to work but this whole having to move to get dressed thing is not working out!
  • Is being held hostage by the couch. Don't rescue me, I kinda like it here.
  • Wonders: If you spend all day doing nothing, how do you know when you're done?
  • To be, or not to be productive? That is the question!
  • Is feeling lazier than Bruno Mars right now!
  • I'm not lazy. I'm motivationally challenged.
  • Didn't give a crap yesterday. Didn't give a crap today. Probably won't give a crap tomorrow.


Perverted:

  • I feel better, my body is clean. But no matter how hard I scrub, my mind is still dirty.
  • I always have to choose my words wisely or something I say will come out perverted!
  • Isn't right for everyone. Side Effects include sexual urges, night sweats, increased heart rate and wonderful muscle contractions - proceed with caution!
  • Hey Facebook! Behind this computer, deep inside there is a sick, warped, perverted individual just waiting to come out.


Random / Weird:

  • I don't care if you think I'm crazy. Life is too short to be normal!
  • I tried to be normal once. Worst five minutes of my life!
  • Signs of Insanity: 1. Talking to yourself. 2. Having a fight with yourself. 3. Losing that fight with yourself. 4. Ignoring yourself.
  • People call me werid because they won't admit how awesome I am!
  • Being crazy if the only thing that gets me through the day.
  • Yes, I am crazy. What's your excuse?
  • Five out of four psychiatrists say I'm nuts.


Sarcastic:

  • Warning: Prone to sarcastic comments whenever you say something.
  • Sarcasm is offered free of charge.
  • So it seems a certain person believes I have a problem with sarcasm. Well than you Caption Obvious for that startling revelation!
  • Today's Attitude Forecast: Slightly sarcastic with possible storms of "I couldn't care less".
  • I refuse to have a battle of wit with an unarmed person!


Stubborn:

  • I'm not stubborn. I'm just always right!
  • Don't tell me I can't do something because I will move Heaven and Earth to prove you wrong.
  • I'm not stubborn. I just have a strict policy with dealing with the opinion of others.
  • Thinks when God made me, he made me go through the hard-headed line twice.
  • Would give up if she wasn't such a stubborn bitch!


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Comments 4 comments

AllieRambles profile image

AllieRambles 5 years ago from Bay Area, California

These are funny. I was not only thinking of myself posting these, but my some of my stubborn and sarcastic friends too. I just may need to borrow some of these.

Thanks for the laughs.

~Allie


Jagodka profile image

Jagodka 5 years ago Author

Anytime. Don't worry I don't own these, I just did a lot of Facebook researching. :)


danielleantosz profile image

danielleantosz 5 years ago from Florida

lol! These are awesome, thanks for sharing.


lucybell21 profile image

lucybell21 4 years ago from Troy, N.Y.

Just to funny. I update mine sometimes when I an mad, then i take it back the next day, but not until at least 10 people have seen it, and want to know what is going on. One day I apolozized to someone that does not even have a facebook, and my son asked who i was talking to. Needless to say I deleted that post, mostly because some people knew who I was talking about. bet they snickered.

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