Don't Text Me Bro

Travel’n Person is not usually the first to jump on the technology bandwagon. I do not have a Facebook page, I do not Twitter, I do not have a smart phone and do not even have text messaging on my dumb phone. You might think that some people are afraid of technology and are resistant to change but in my case, it is just being cheap.

Perhaps ‘cheap’ is not the right word – ‘I hate waste’ is a more appropriate description. I survived for many years without being able to surf the web from my cell phone and don’t find the monthly cost to be worth it. The hours people waste on Facebook and following celebrities on Twitter really cuts down on productivity.

However, Travel’n Person is facing a dilemma and may have to eventually break down and get texting added to my phone account and buy a phone that allows me to read them. “Why?” you ask, because people keep sending me text messages!

You are probably saying “It’s only five bucks a month mister tightwad!” Yes, I did the math and it is true that the result will only be about $60 per year or $1,320 over the next twenty-two years of my statistical life expectancy, which (with interest) translates into an early retirement of about 2.67 days – and I was planning to play golf those days so if you deduct greens fees… well, the point is that it’s not just the money.

What worries me most is the time lost and what it will lead to after texting becomes – just not enough any more. Like the occasional users of recreational drugs, a few casual texts can lead to a desire to surf the web. Then I’ll be wanting to download movies on my phone, playing games like Angry Birds instead of working, then wandering around in my car to see if the GPS can figure out where I am – and before you know it I’ll be Twittering pictures of my underpants and apologizing to my family on CNN.

So, if you value these articles and don’t want to see Travel’n Person forced to resign from the Hub Pages due to “ethics questions”, please Don’t Text Me – call instead so I can hear a human voice – or better yet, send an email (no pictures please).

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