How To Handle Negative Behavior On Social Sites

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Millions of people everyday use Social Network Sites and with socialization comes oddities that happen while visiting or networking. Gossip, back biting, bullying, all types of child-like antics happen everyday on the Internet. People with vendettas over an article or a person attack people like the black plague, slithering in and out looking for their prey. Many of us overlook the issues at hand after all it is the Internet; but others end up being sucked in to a dark tunnel, trying endlessly to find there way out.

So how do we handle etiquette on the Internet? Do we continue to allow people to bully, taunt or defame our character? How do we handle the everyday stress of someone making us feel like we are just a speckle of dust, while the other person dangles strings like a puppeteer?

We should not ever fear people on the Internet. They cannot control our actions or thoughts. We have our own minds and can easily block them out of our lives in a click of a button.

Social sites are for networking. We should never place all of our colorful eggs into one Easter basket. Placing your eggs into one basket could stagnate what you are trying to achieve, so spread them around and share them with others.

Never take an allegiance to hover in on place. Interact with others and share your worth. Be open-minded and enjoy the space where you are most comfortable. Bullying is not acceptable, nor is stalking or harassing another person. Treat others the way you would wish to be treated while participating on Internet. Be constructive and place your opinions in a positive way, you don't have to directly shove a person in the corner to get their attention.

Everyone's opinions count and every person that walks this Earth has a heart, soul and mind, so tread lightly on their feelings. Are you a person who is an optimist or pessimist? If you are an optimist it is easy to always find good in someone; but if you are a pessimist then life can be a little more complicated. If everything in your life weighs you down, try networking with those who are positive. Networking with positive people and environments on social network sites can give you a warm and inviting feeling so you are not drained when you are trying to achieve a goal.

Do you really have a vendetta with a person on the world wide web? Or is it just a way to vent because you are not getting the attention you are lacking in the real world? If you are lacking happiness in the real world. Your life can be miserable on the Internet. Yes you may disagree with someone's opinions but seriously, always being negative is going to eventually take its toll on your Internet buddies and then you find that you are completely ignored. If things get under your skin ignore it. Holding on to something that you cannot fix causes more stress for yourself, than it does for those around you.

Sending malicious e-mails with negative intent or writing something deragatory about another person only makes an arse out of you. People can track ip addresses and report malicious activity. Writing about someone to just get it off of your chest really makes you look childish and not professional. Is throwing darts at a person really necessary? The best thing to do is get up off your duff and step away from the computer, report it to the proper authorities if you believe it is getting out of hand. Talk to people on the Internet you can confide in and will not blast your business all over the Internet. But being malicious is not necessary. All of us can get along if we work together as one.

Share your thoughts and ideas and do not believe that anything you are asking on a social network is bad. You are an individual and there are no right or wrong questions or posts for that matter. If you do not like how something is being handled, address it in a positive way. Slinging mud will only cause conflict and chaos which is unnecessary.

Social sites are meant for us to interact with others and meet new friends we would not otherwise have met in person. It is all about give and take so treat others the way you wish to be treated.



#1/30

Have you ever felt threatened on a Social Site?

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Have you ever been Bullied or Stalked on the Internet?

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Comments 43 comments

must65gt profile image

must65gt 4 years ago

great hub...you know there is someone I have issues with here. But I have tried to turn it over to someone with more discerning decision making ability in the overall eternal plan. Its people like you that make it better for us all.


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 4 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Very sensible, matter-of-fact and compassionate information. Great job! Voted UP & UI. Hugs, mar.


jabez3 4 years ago

BTW AEvans, the anonymous post is mine. I was logged in and when I clicked post comment I was no longer logged in, so I just posted it again and fixed some typos.

This a very interesting hub. I have been following the Tyler Clementi case. But what amazes me is that Ravi is claiming to be innocent after he used a spy cam to record Ty is a sexual act then broadcasted it all over the net. 15 counts of invasion of privacy, tampering with evidence and so on. His weak defense was he was afraid that Ty's friend would steal something that belonged to him(This case hits too close to home)after he has "broke the law" and been caught.Ty is the true victim here and did nothing wrong except have his privacy [illegally] invaded then have it exploited on the internet. This type of mentality reminds me of this little boy my mom babysits. He will go hit another kid and as soon as he knows he is in trouble for it, he will try and say that the other kid hit him first. Come on children, tell the hole truth and nothing but the truth :)


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

I have always been treated with respect on the net. Maybe I just haven't been writing long enough to get negative comments or to be treated badly. I would not appreciate being "bullied" nor would I ever insult any other writer.


Marcy Goodfleisch profile image

Marcy Goodfleisch 4 years ago from Planet Earth

Really timely and appropriate hub, AEvans. I wasn't sure what to vote on one of the polls, because I have been stalked, but I knew how to deal with it. It was, however, very creepy. Had I been less aware of what was happening, or not familiar with ways to address it, it would have been much worse. Thanks for publishing this - voted up, useful, awesome and interesting.


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri

Great and Timely Hub! I have felt stalked, but I didn't know what to do about it. Thanks for the great info! Votes and shares!


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

must65gt: We have to let go and move on God would not wish for us to hang on. Treat others with respect and in turn it is received. Thank you so much for the kudos! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

marcojour: Glad you enjoyed as you know I am compassionate about people there feelings, thoughts and emotions. We should always treat people the way we wish to be treated. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

jabez3: That is a sad story and people should not be victimized on the Internet no matter where they are. I hope all of the best for Ty and may the outcome be bright! Ty's friend had not right to do that to him at all.


R9139 profile image

R9139 4 years ago

Great Hub :)


Rusticliving profile image

Rusticliving 4 years ago from California

When I first joined the internet back in 1997, I was bullied and stalked back then. With everything being new to me, it was a wierd situation, but I did go to the authorites. It's a lot easier to track IPs now then it was back then. As for bullying, I think I've seen it all and then I boot up in the morning and I see more. Maybe we should all go back to letter writing (Snail Mail). by the time we write down our thoughts, our frustrations are dimmed and by the time the letter reaches the person intended for, we most likely will have forgotten why we were mad in the first place! *Just saying* Great Hub! Voting up and definately sharing this one!


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

mary615: You have a heart of gold and you and I are so much alike. But there are people on the Internet that are bullied, harmed and live in fear behind there keyboard. There isn't any reason for that they just need to walk away and not live in fear of anyone. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Marcy: I have been stalked to and I agree it is not a good feeling, but many of us can get through it. There are those who are fearful and don't know what to do when it comes to any of the issues on the net. I wrote a hub a couple of years ago about stalking and what a person can do to protect themselves. So glad you enjoyed! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

sholland10: I have written a hub about stalking and when you are fearful always turn to someone who can listen and someone that you trust. Nobody should be afraid to be on the Internet, it should be a fun experience! :)


Anamika S profile image

Anamika S 4 years ago from Mumbai - Maharashtra, India

Awesome Hub! Social Sites can be a real pain. I often have Guys popping up and demanding that I chat with them when I am busy. When I tell them that I am busy, many even end up using filthy language and I unfriend them. Voted up and useful and shared on facebook.


homesteadbound profile image

homesteadbound 4 years ago from Texas

Great hub! This is really good advice. thanks so much for a really great hub. This is a great start on your challenge!


Lord De Cross profile image

Lord De Cross 4 years ago

Tips to see who they are:

1--They write single 3 lines of comments-- Too busy with negative thoughts.

2--If you had a problem with them; they will try to make your life miserable. So, narrow down the suspects.

3--They have personal issues and cannot stand others' excellent hubs (that goes to ##1)

4--When they know, they are left behind, like satan, they will try to hurt you the more.

5--Sorry, they will reap what they sow, meaning back pains and headaches.


Sky9106 profile image

Sky9106 4 years ago from A beautiful place on earth.

This is a great hub AEvans. a great hub ! I an so glad you wrote this, I asked a question not to long ago . What's the best advise you will give to someone thinking about joining HP? I got some great answers , but I am not one to go about lying about haw great a place is unless I can defend that greatness.

But I can only guess you I have seen the same thing that led you to write this beauty.

Well I guess you had to go through some lazy roommates and all and can now say with assurance , that you are now going to take it.

Great work.

Of course I voted and here is another.

Beautiful.

Bless.


Ruby H Rose profile image

Ruby H Rose 4 years ago from Northwest Washington on an Island

Wow, something I never thought about. My first thought on reading this awesome story is the 4 agreements. Always tell the truth. Don't take anything personally. Always do your best. Don't assume. I have some social networking friends that get bugged by people hounding them, and they just cut them out of their social life. This is very good information to know. Sad that it has become such an issue. Great writing, thanks.


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

R9139: Thank you! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Rusticliving: It can be so destructive when it happens. It is nice that we now have the capability to track ips thank goodness for that! Thank you for also sharing your story. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Anamika S: Foul language on a message is another issue that does not have to be tolerated. I would do the same thing unfriend at the push of a button! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

homesteadbound: One down 29 more to go! I am glad you appreciate the advice and enjoyed the hub.:)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

lord de cross: lololo! I do enjoy those tips and will have to remember those too. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Sky9106: HP is a wonderful place to be when you surround yourself with positive and inspirational people in your life. Each individual to me on HP that I have had the honors of dealing with as added a wonderful piece of a puzzle to my own life. You are right I am not going to stand around and allow abuse to happen to anyone no matter what site I am on. Glad you enjoyed the hub! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Ruby H Rose: You are welcome. If they are bothering them just click the button. :)Thanks for the kudos!


Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

Your thoughts and insights are spot-on AE. Unfortunately some few take kindness for weakness and do their shallow thing in consequence. AE, you said it, no one should be afraid on social sites or the internet period.


Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 4 years ago from Jamaica

We have become a pair of advocates! I have been drawn into this kind of foolishness and I had to withdraw myself. This has got to stop. I believe the world and the internet is big enough for every body so no need for malicious behaviour.


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Alastar Packer: It is upsetting when people behave maliciously and other suffer from there consequence. Living in fear is something that nobody should have to go through. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Cardisa: We are advocates! It does have to stop and I will protect those who have had to experience this on-line. All of us should use etiquette when using the Internet and always remember that many of them have became friends and we have invited them into our home. We should treat others they way we would like to be treated.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Hi J! Long time, no see...this is a fabulous hub, girl, and definitely hits home with me. I love your puppeteer analogy-I was recently 'banned' from FB (my acct has been disabled) and I believe strongly it was hacked. Why on earth do people do such a thing? I did not violate any rules whatsoever, I'm quite harmless as you know! ;) But FB won't tell me what I supposedly did even though I've written to them regarding my suspicion. It's a conundrum, and I feel like that speckle of dust-though to a corporation! And the hacker in question, certainly. Oh, well, I have Hubpages and am able to interact to my heart's content.

Not sure I'll even try another social site, but if I could find one I liked, maybe...

Anyhow, it's so good to see you again-I hope you and yours are doing well these days.

Laurel


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

I find the positiveness and kindness of my readers and friends on the Internet a source of strength and joy, and just as much I find the negativeness and rudeness of people who don't like me a source of emotional pain and sadness. Some personalities do clash due to many reasons such as low self-esteems and prejudice. It is so easy to simply ignore and block a negative person out of one's life on the Internet. If he/she is a co-writer sharing the same site with me, I regard him as an ideal opportunity for me to overcome my ego and inability to love others as I love myself.

AEvans, I have voted this up and a must-read for all citizens of CyberSpace.


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

lorlie6: That is sad news about Facebook. What in the World is happening? I am so glad you are still with HP and if your account was hacked on FB then there is a forum and a contact that you can deal with. Sad that someone would do something so malicious to people who are only trying to network and share there knowledge, ideas and work with others. I am glad to see you too! :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Martie Coester: That is the best way to look at etiquette on the Internet. Yes all can overcome if they are willing to do it. Sometimes egos get in the way and being negative really isn't worth the time on the Internet. When we invite people in there are many we can say are our friends. :)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

Hi AEvans! Thanks for writing this. There are many people that have been bullied. Your hub is a step in the right direction to let them know they aren't alone and that there are resources to assist them.

Voted up, up and away!


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Dexter: All of it has to come to an end and if there are support groups and ways of dealing with the circumstances people will feel better about there experience on the Internet.:)


FloraBreenRobison profile image

FloraBreenRobison 4 years ago

This is an excellent article. I'm not sure what else to say here, because it is not in my best interest to say anything on this subject on this website. I will say, however, that I've cleared up a second relationship problem I had here.


Ardie profile image

Ardie 4 years ago from Neverland

You make a lot of sense here AEvans - but of course you do! Your suggestions can be used in so many different situations whether it be for children, adults, men, or women. Sometimes it is so easy to forget that on the Internet one click can make the negative things go away. Wow! That's refreshing :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

FloraBreenRobison: Thank you and I am glad you are resolving any issues you may have had with others. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Ardie: Yes it can be use for everyone and in just one click it can disappear especially when they are not your next door neighbors, but that is meant for a different hub. :)


Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

Julianna ~ This is a great article that I wish everyone would take to heart. It is too bad that there are evil people out there. What I have found from my negative experience is that the people who are doing the "hurting" will simply move on to their next victim when they are done with you. The sad thing is that these people who cause problems seem to get away with it. They are good at their "game" and don't stop. I have reported someone who has been trouble for me as well as a problem for others too. It did no good which is very frustrating. So for me, the best thing is to simply ignore. The hard thing is not knowing who you can really trust.

Sharyn


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Sharyn's Slant: Keep your head up and whatever has happened just remember God sees everything. Whatever it is that to shall pass. Sometimes people do things they would not normally do off-line. The man upstairs leads all of us to the right people. Just hang in there, the darkness always comes to light. :)


AEvans profile image

AEvans 4 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

seomarketingseo: I will take a peek at your hubs. I don't know honestly how many I can read. I read many writers and their work, but I will certainly try to drop by and check-it out. :)

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