Funny, Silly Facebook Status Updates, Quotes And Sayings
A page of hundreds of very silly and funny Facebook status updates, funny quotes and sayings to make you and your friends laugh.
Funny, Silly Statuses:
- I'm such a neat freak I feel bad when I don't empty the trash basket on my laptop.
- I'm confused about why landlines have a hashtag. Did Grandma do some Tweeting back in her day?
- How good would it be if a liar's pants really did catch on fire!
- Looking for me? I'm with stupid. Doing what stupid does.
- If it doesn't make sense just smile and nod.
- It's six of one, half a dozen of the other.
- Today I found out that spring rolls are not just for eating in springtime.
- I'm not immature I just know how to have fun more than you do.
- According to my childhood, one out of three pigs is a good builder.
- What's lighter than blue? Light blue.
- What's lighter than black? Every color.
- Smile, while you still have teeth!
- These instructions would be just as useful if they were written with a blunt pencil.
- I hate typo's. You mix up a couple of letters and your entire status is urined.
- Food is an important part of keeping a balanced diet.
- If I share it I don't have it. So I keep my secret.
- Today I found out kidney beans do not come from the kidneys of small animals, they are just beans. I had been avoiding eating them up until now.
- Why do they call it after dark when it's really after light?
- Why do they call it a pair of pant's when they are not a pair?
- It goes up and never comes down (Your age).
- Hard work never killed anyone but why take the chance?
- You are reading this status even though it's stupid.
- This just goes to prove, even if I write a silly status update you will read it!
- Be crazy, be stupid, be wild because life's too short to be cool.
- Sometimes I listen to strangers conversations and mentally give my opinion.
- I don't need a therapist. I just need a friend to be silly with.
- I used to wonder what it would be like to read other people's minds. Then I got facebook.
- Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
- Sometimes I pretend to be average, but it gets boring. So I go back to being AWESOME!
- God grant me the serenity not to look like a fool today.
- I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
- Maybe the day doesn't like being seized.
- Chocolate doesn't ask silly question. Chocolate always comforts.
- Exercise. A poor man's plastic surgery.
- Maybe it's Maybelline. Maybe it's photoshop.
- Don't be silly, I'm not mad at you. I just decided to unfriend you (In real life).
- Don't expect an intelligent answer when you ask a stupid question.
- I'm at the age where happy hour is my nap time.
- I'm not stupid... Until you put me in front of a good looking emotionally unavailable man.
- When my internet is down I forget that the rest of my computer still works.
- You are the result of 5 billion years of successful evolution. Now act like it.
- The first step of forgiveness is understanding some people are just stupid.
- I wasn't that drunk. Dude, you were in the pool trying to find Nemo.
- Adults are just kids with money.
- If people never did silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.
- A life spent making mistakes is more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
- It isn't that I'm not a people person. I'm just not a stupid people person.
- You can't fix stupid. But you can watch it in action. Every day. On Facebook.
- Yes I did delete you from my friends list. I grew bored of your stupid status updates every 2 minutes, every day.
- I don't know Karate, but I know CRAZY and I'm not afraid to use it.
- Best friends don't let you do stupid things...alone.
- I don't have a drinking problem. I'm just really thirsty.
- A day without sunshine is night.
- My nickname is Billy. Silly Billy.
- My nickname is Duffa. Silly Duffa.
- Man is the most intelligent and most silly of all creatures.
- The truth is I'm not LOL (IMNLOL)
- Grow up Math. Solve your own problems.
- There's a certain happiness which comes from being silly.
- Call me silly but I'd prefer to eat cookies than worry about having a six pack.
- I was sleeping alone the other night. Thanks to the pest exterminator.
- Smart Talented Person In Demand (STUPID)
- We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.
- With the risk of being very stupid, I am taking a chance.
- It's silly to worry. Half of the things we worry about with never happen, the other half will happen anyway.
- Author: StricktlyDating Copyright 2013
- Just the thought of a hamburger makes my mouth water.
- You don't like eating things that have a face? OK, here's a plate of worms.
- The thought of wearing jeans that aren't skinny jeans bothers me. I mean what did I used to do with all that extra space around the ankles?
- I love chocolate so much I get emotional when I see it.
- I just automatically think you're signing off with lots of love when you type LOL.
- Apple and Blackberry should team up to make a phone called The Pie.
- What if oxygen is poisonous and just takes about 80 years to kill us?
- Call me silly, but haircuts are the reason I have trust issues.
- Call me silly, but why is it called a TV set where there is only one?
- Call me silly, but I don't know why the number 11 is not pronounced onety one?
- My parents still haven't apologized for making me stupid.
- Keep calm. You're being silly.
- etc = End Of Thinking Capacity.
- I am so behind the times I thought YOLO was someone who was friends with J Lo.
- I have to be serious enough of the time. Silly Tweets always make me smile.
- No one is going to think you're silly for putting one more haha on the end of your hahahaha!
- I'm old enough to know better, but silly enough to still do it anyway.
- You never know what you have. Until you clean your room.
- When a person laughs too much over stupid things that person is sad deep inside.
- At school in Australia you earn a licence to use a pen (How stupid).
- Don't tell me what I already know. I'm not stupid.
- I wasn't talking nonsense I am just more intelligent than some.
- I wasn't being silly I was just being creative.
- I'm silly, I'm smart, I'm fun, I'm crazy. I am enjoying life.
- It's too cold for this silly nonsense.
- I'm a little to old for all this nonsense.
- (S)o (I)'ve (L)oved (L)osers (Y)eah.
- A little nonsense now and then never hurt anybody.
- I'm only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
- A little nonsense is relished by wise men. Me included.
- Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsens of those who think they talk sense.
- I am adult enough to walk away from nonsense when it surrounds me.
- Confucius say. He who sleeps like a baby does not have one.
- Keep your words soft and sweet, just incase you have to eat them.
- Be nice to nerds. You might end up working for one someday.
- What gets wet when drying? A towel.
- I'm not being stupid - I just know how to party!
- What belongs to you but others use it more often than you? Your name.
- My Doctor told me I should not work out until I am in better shape.
- Anything is possible when you don't know what you're talking about.
- Totally uninformed, or blissfully unaware. Whether the glass is half full is up to you.
Author: Strickltydating Copyright 2013
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