My Amazing Trip Through the Rocky Mountains - Part 1

The Rocky Mountains - My Amazing Trip

By Dexter Yarbrough. Yes. I am a city boy by birth, but my heart belongs in the south (Georgia/Mississippi) and the mountains. "City of Big Shoulders," "Second City," "Hog butcher for the world," and "That Toddling Town" aptly describes where I have lived for years. It is a great city with its skyscrapers, museums, nightlife and "The Lake." As for the food, it doesn't get any tastier than that which you can find in the "Heart of America."

But with the good comes the bad and "Sweet Home" has its share of humidity, crime and silliness. It was time to take a trip! Time to find a place where there will be few people and beauty for miles around. I decided to head to the Rocky Mountains!

No Tryst!

Oh, yes. I had been to the Rocky Mountains for short day trips. But this time I was going to rough it! Just me and my camping supplies and cameras. I was going to spend two days out in the wild - communing with nature in God's country!

My wife, a city girl, couldn't understand why I wanted to go off alone into "nowhere." Jokingly inquiring as to whether or not I was going to see another woman (the answer was no), I told her I wanted to head off to "where the deer and the buffalo roam" and points beyond. Raising her eyebrows and looking a bit more serious, she asked if I was going to be with a man. I just can't win!

After assuring my wife that I wasn't going off to a "Brokeback Mountain" rendezvous, I hit the road across country to the beautiful southern Rockies (Nebraska is so boring to drive through). Upon completing an 18 hour drive and with plenty of daylight left, I decided to leave my vehicle at a parking area in the Roosevelt National Forest and begin my sojourn.

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A Friend Indeed

Now, you have to understand something. I am a black man. Yep. There ain't a whole lot of us walking around in the Rockies. A friend of mine reminded me of this with a text message (within cell phone coverage) about an hour before reaching my parking spot. He texted that I should be careful not to get shot because some of those deer and elk are the same color as I am. "Ha, ha, ha, funny," I texted back. See, I know that the month of June isn't hunting season. I think.

Thank goodness I brought along bug spray. Gosh, the bugs were awful as I left my vehicle behind and started my hike. The weather was warm and the ice capped mountains were breathtaking. The Asian beetles had done some major damage to a lot of the pine trees, so there was a mixture of green and brown off in the distance.

Aside from the bugs, it was just wonderful breathing in clean air and taking in the beautiful scenery. I can just imagine how the settlers in the old days must have felt upon reaching the foothills and taking in God's beautiful creation.

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My Encounter

As I was walking along, I came across something that I didn't expect. The funny thing is sometimes we lose all reason when we are in an unfamiliar area alone. I mean, we can have the best in education, street smarts and common sense. But all that went out the window for me. I started thinking about tigers and lions (the African ones) and started getting a little scared! I was hoping no alligators would come out from among the low-lying swamp-like areas! The dinosaurs did die off, didn't they?

What I didn't expect to see were cattle. Aren't they supposed to be on a ranch or in the supermarket covered in plastic packaging? I was actually scared when I walked up on a bunch of - cows! There were about 30 of them staring at me and I was scared to death. All reason had left me. Do cows eat humans? Will they flour me down, fry me and smother me with onions and gravy? Will there be a stampede with me getting trampled? Can a cow out run a scared black dude?

Now wait a minute, I began to think. There have been numerous times you have walked though gang members hanging on street corners. These cows look mean but those dudes on the south side of the big "C" look meaner! How dare you be afraid?

Since I don't eat red meat, I figured the cows could sense that I was no threat to their livelihood. 'Hey, I don't eat you so can you return the favor?' Anyway, I gathered my courage and walked through that herd. I also figured that a herd of black cows would have sympathy for a black man walking alone in their territory. You know, in cow think - "he's black and we're black. Let's give the brotha' from anotha' motha' a pass." They even posed for a few photos! Whew! Other than a few "moo's" and stares, I pressed on. I think I will ride this "black" thang out!

Now that I had faced that encounter, I was emboldened and determined to move forward in my journey. However, there was one lone cow a short distance from the others. I noticed that it had just unloaded a pretty large load of dung! I had planned on taking a photo of this lone cow, but after seeing and smelling that, I decided to move away. Can you believe that cow actually smirked at me as I walked away from it, as if to say "pop, pop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is?" At that same moment, I realized - I did not pack any toilet paper. Damn!

Stay Tuned for Part 2 of "My Amazing Trip Through the Rockies!" - Dexter Yarbrough

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Comments 65 comments

breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

Dexter, you rock. I am laughing out loud and it feels so good. Actually, I think you are very brave to take off alone on your journey. I can't imagine doing that, but I have to say I admire you. Thanks for the story. I feel like I was with you on this trip. What's next for the second part of our journey? Up funny and oh so awesome. BY the way, do cows eat people?


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Pop! Thanks! I actually had a good time. However, at the time it wasn't as funny! lol. More to come! Thanks for the votes. YOU rock!


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Next time, call me first! I'll guide you.

(Man-eating cows? Oh brother!) :-)


dahoglund profile image

dahoglund 5 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

voted up and funny. You've got the kind of humor that I can relate to.


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

Looking forward to the next chapter, too, of this saga, Dexter. Be just a little afraid of that cow pack, Dex. To my knowledge, they do not eat people ... yet, but baby mama cows have been known to attack and trample those who get too near thir offspring. (See myhub on "Cow Facts and Cow Trivia." :)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Will! It's a deal. I will try and drag you along on my next trip!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Dahoglund! Thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed it!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Drbj! Thanks so much and I will check out your hub. I appreciate you commenting.


FitnezzJim profile image

FitnezzJim 5 years ago from Fredericksburg, Virginia

Did it turn out that the one lone cow a short distance from the others was a bull?


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi FitnezzJim! Ha! Ha! Ha! No it was a female cow. No bull....!


Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 5 years ago from United Kingdom

Hi Dex, I hope you weren't kitted out in your smart new avatar outfit for the hike!! funny hub, I really enjoyed it, now had you read my 'cow hub' you would have known they are friendly and photogenic by nature!! can't wait for part 2, voted up!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Movie Master! After I read your comment, I immediately went over and read your cow hub! Yes, I wish I had read your hub before heading out on my adventure!

I actually wore appropriate clothing! Thanks so much!


Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 5 years ago from United Kingdom

Hi Dex, laughing so much....


Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 5 years ago from Jamaica

You kill me....I actually thought you saw a lion. Scared of a few cows?......hehehe

I am anxiously awaiting part two....gosh, I wish I was there...dang it!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Cardisa! Yeah, just a little scared, you know! But I got through it standing tall! Part two will be out soon! Thanks so much!


Motown2Chitown 5 years ago

Dexter, this hub was great! Your ability to find humor in virtually anything is wonderful! Praying for you here in the Windy City - mostly that you will enjoy the wide expanses of God's country out west. Again, great hub!


Sueswan 5 years ago

Too funny Dexter! Can't wait to read part 2. :-)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Mo! Sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying! Thanks for the prayers - know they are being returned! See you soon and thanks again!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you, Sueswan! I am glad you enjoyed it. Part 2 coming soon!


Sueswan 5 years ago

Pictures are great too. I enlarged them. Boy those cows are nasty looking. I would have ran the other way. lol


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

I started to run the other way!!! Thanks!


Sharon Douglas profile image

Sharon Douglas 5 years ago from GA, United States

hahahaha, Dexter you are fnnny!

I enjoy reading about your amazing trip through the rocky mountains and your funny experiences and your pictures of course ;)

I love nature so this hit home for me.

Thanks for sharing, can't wait to read part 2. Keep up the good job!

Sharon


iZeko profile image

iZeko 5 years ago

"Let's give the brotha' from anotha' motha' a pass." ;-))) I bet the pretty one, with the oversized earring No. 463, didn’t think that. It looks more like “If you think I'm vegetarian…, I have a surprise for you, brotha'…” Looking forward to part 2.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Sharon! Good to see you and thanks so much! I am so glad you enjoyed reading about my adventure. Part 2 is upcoming.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

iZeko! Now YOU are funny! Thanks so much and part 2 will be out soon!


Hollie Thomas profile image

Hollie Thomas 5 years ago from United Kingdom

Brilliant!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you, Hollie!


Ghost32 5 years ago

This is ESPECIALLY great reading for those of us (like yours truly) who grew up on a ranch in the Rockies in the first place. You've done one heckuva job in laying out your "cow culture shock" in a way that allowed me to live it through your eyes (and pounding heart).

Voted up and a bunch; off to #2....


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks so much Ghost! Cows can be scary creatures sometimes! lol


StayPos profile image

StayPos 5 years ago from Florida, USA

Excellent Hub Dexter!

Thanks for capturing the fun and excitment of your adventures into the Rockies :-) You've given us just the nudge we need to release our " inner Eagle Scout spirit " hehe. Thanks for sharing!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi StayPos! Thank you for reading! It was actually a fun trip. Always good to see you!


Faithful Daughter profile image

Faithful Daughter 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

Dexter,

You are a brave man! No, really, afraid of cows? This is too funny. I'd be more afraid of ticks crawling on my body and latching on to me, but cows? Naahh

Thanks for the laugh.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Faithful Daughter! Yeah, I know. But when you get up close on about 30 of them, they are quite intimidating! Thank YOU!


Motown2Chitown 5 years ago

Hey, cows are BIG! They could do you in just by tripping and falling onto you! I'm with you, Dex. Any number of cows congregated together might scare me to! :)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Mo! Cows are HUGE when you get up close to them! I just found out from another hubber that they can trample you if you get too close to their young.

I think my initial fear was justified!


Motown2Chitown 5 years ago

Agreed. I don't so much mind the milk cows on a farm, in fact I quite like them. BUT, those kinda cows that eventually become steak are another story altogether. :-) Glad you made it out alive, bro! :P


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, Mo!


cherrycrime26 profile image

cherrycrime26 5 years ago from NY, Now Living in Atlanta Ga

Your wife was really concerned lol, well I have to say I would of been also, and no toilet paper? Wow! Adventurist read :) voted up


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, Cherrycrime26! It was quite an adventure!


Cloverleaf profile image

Cloverleaf 5 years ago from Calgary, AB, Canada

WOW, thank you for taking me along this amazing trip! You had me laughing all the way. Nice one :-)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Cloverleaf! Thanks! I haven't seen you for awhile.


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Such an interesting hub and so very well presented, with beautiful photos. I am bookmarking this one for my 'Armchair travelling slot'.

I thororughly enjoyed and look forward to reading the second part now.

Take care

Eiddwen.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks Eiddwen! I have to complete part 3!


Just For Fun profile image

Just For Fun 5 years ago from Pennsylvania, USA

Very funny. This reminds me of a story my dad told me about when he joined the army at 17. Street tough New Yorker spends his entire first night of watch ready to bayonet the sounds he's hearing, to find out at morning they're goats.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Ha ha ha! Now THAT is funny. I hope you check out the rest!


angemac23 profile image

angemac23 5 years ago from Canada

Love this hub!


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Amazing hub with beautiful photos, I look forward to the next one now.

Take care

Eiddwen.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Angemac! Thanks so much! I appreciate the follow!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Eiddwen! I am so glad you enjoyed it. Thanks!


always exploring profile image

always exploring 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

Dexter this is so funny. I love your writing talent. Brokeback Mountain mention was hilarious. The black cows were even funnier. Your photographs were great. Thank you for an enjoyable read.

Cheers


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Always Exploring! I am glad you found it enjoyable. I hope you like Part 2.


Prisana profile image

Prisana 5 years ago from Thailand and Colorado

Hilarious! You were afraid of cows?! I saw my first oreo cow a few weeks ago in Virginia. It was black and had a white stripe down its belly. Really funny! Thanks for a great story! Voted up!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Prisana and welcome. Thank you so much! I hope you return and read the rest of the series. Thanks again!


feenix profile image

feenix 5 years ago

Hello, Dexter,

I would like to have joined you in that adventure (and it wouldn't have been no Broke Back Mountain thang, I assure you ;-) ).

Anyway, this is a beautifully-written and very entertaining post.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Feenix! It is so good to have you back. And I bet we would have had a great time on this adventure. Thanks so much!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

What an awesome adventure!! I've been to the Rockies a few times...simply beautiful, those cows are NOT! haha!

LOL to feenix's comment! BTW Brokeback Mountain is one of my favorite movies!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Sunshine! Thanks. It was a really great time! Feenix is something else!


phdast7 profile image

phdast7 5 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

Great trip. Interesting, well-written hub with excellent pictures. Thanks for posting it for all to share.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Phdast7! Thank YOU for reading. I hope you get to check out the other 3 parts of the trip as well!


eddiecarrara profile image

eddiecarrara 5 years ago from New Hampshire

Hey Dexter, that's some funny dung... I always wanted to take a trip alone just to gather my thoughts, I think I'll add it to my bucket list. Now that I think about it, I was going to try cow tipping in norther NH when I was a kid, we got to the fence at the edge of the field and all the cows started towards us, we got scared and ran, lol your not alone my friend... voted up and funny :)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Ha ha ha!! Eddie, I am so glad I am not alone when it comes to the cows! This was a great trip. I hope you decide to read the rest of my adventure. There are 3 other parts! Thanks!


DanielNeff profile image

DanielNeff 4 years ago from Asheville, NC

Dexter, wonderful article. I will definitely be reading the rest of the series. Twenty years ago I lived in Colorado for a year and did a lot of exploring. I'll have to write about my memories there as well. Great blend of humor in your writing.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States Author

Hi Daniel! Thanks so much for taking the time to read about my adventure. Please let me know what you think about the rest of it. And I am looking forward to reading about YOUR memories!


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Oh my goodness this is funny! Now I'm hooked and have to find out how it turns out. Too funny my friend! Those of us who live in that environment can appreciate it almost as much as those of you who have never ventured into the wilderness. I wish I had been there to see it in person.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States Author

It really was an amazing trip, Billybuc! Thanks for reading!

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