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Joined 3 years ago




Hey world! How's it going? Allow me to introduce myself as one of the most versatile people you'll ever meet. I'm an author, an expert on panic attacks, I've been quoted in major newspapers (coming soon - and textbooks, too!), and still... I have a kinder, gentler side. I am crazy in love with my husband and 3 kids, addicted to Bejeweled Blitz (and once upon a time I helped work on their Trademark matters!) I'm an eBook junkie, too. Oh. My. God. I must have 80,000 eBooks. I just love collecting them! Right now I'm working my way through smutty vampire romance fantasy crap, but next on my list is all of the old Robert Ludlum stuff I read in the 1980s! Cold War Fiction - COOL!!! I love spy stuff, and actually wish I was one! Or a computer hacker - the "white hat" kind, though, I guess. If I HAVE to choose. (sigh) I live on an island that I like to call Alcatraz. Living on an island sucks ass, so don't think it's all quaint and wonderful because horrible, wicked rich people WILL find your island and they WILL overrun it, and their wives - who stay at home and don't work (or do for charity) - WILL make your life a living hell. Also, one word: Tourists. Grrrr. I have never seen more REI shit in one place than on a Sunday in front of The Blackbird Bakery. It's a fashion show - people parade their prize winning purebred dogs while sipping a skinny latte and wearing the latest Chaco's (look them up then roll your eyes at their hideousness and priceyness because hell, for that much why not just buy Prada and at least LOOK pretty?) My alter-ego is a photographer. I'm working towards a Canon D50, but I don't have 5 grand just yet (feel free to contribute.) Currently I have a Canon Rebel XTi, which is like, a cheap-ass $1000 camera. (Seriously - photography is EXPENSIVE!!! I think it's because Kodak's pissed about not selling film anymore so they got together with all the digital camera makers (that count) and said "CHARGE 14 TIMES MORE THAN YOU WERE GONNA just to SCREW WITH THEM!!!!!" They know we'll buy the shit anyway. I think being into photography really ties in nicely with my secret fantasy of being a world-class spy. I think, maybe, I'd be a celebrity stalker type of spy rather than a government one, because - you know, you can dress cooler!

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