A Poem from a non-Poet: In Memory of Ben my Hero my Friend
The image used as a tattoo in commemoration of Ben
I'm not a poet AT ALL. But these words have come to me to describe this day, the one year anniversary of an incredible animal who loved me so much he gave his life for me. This describes not only the day of his death but today, the one year anniversary of his death. Which I've dreaded for over a week.
The sun glistens in the early morning light
it is a quiet reminder of the awful pain of that particular night.
That night happened one year ago today
when my faithful companion gave his life away.
We sat in the cold and darkness of the night
waiting for him to find his way from the darkness to the "light"
I begged over and over "please just take your nap.
I don't want to decide whether I can save you or continue to make you fight."
Once that last vehicle came to check on us,
We shared his last breath together and he passed without a fuss.
I screamed up to the heavens "why why why?"
It was me who should have gone not my big beautiful guy.
He rests comfortably on our land nestled safe and secure.
I know he is with us, I know absolutely for sure.
Today, I dreaded as the anticipation grew I did not want to relive those memories That is one thing I definitely knew.
Memories of a boy who loved me so unconditionally.
He saved me without a thought,
I screamed again at the sky
"why would you save me only to let him die?"
I was ready he was not
he had many lessons needing to be taught
My Joe, created a cross to nail into the ground
as a simply stated reminder of our horrible loss. He made this cross from the wood from our barn which shelters our boys from any weather or harm.
Monte peacefully accepted the halter which I placed upon his head and out of the pasture Ben's comrade in life was quietly led.
I took him to the site, we held so much secure
only to find flowers which had grown and for which we'd never heard.
Monte sniffed the ground,
certainly knowing the reason
for why we stood here on this day of a very cold season. There is frost in the air.
It is cold, it is wet. Because the ground is not frozen, not now, not yet,
Joe pounded the cross
which he made from Ben's shed
as I hugged Monte tightly and cried into his chest.
We love that boy, The boy we called Ben
He was and remains our forever friend.
Many tears are cried this day
as the hours grow near.
The hours in which my boy took his life without fear.
I cry as I write this poem,
as I have had to place a cross on a place now called Ben's home. Ben, My boy, was such a huge loss.
I cannot compare to the parents who have lost
their children in war or at some other horrible cost.
I can only compare to those who can understand
the unconditional love you will
find with a pet who's loyalty is so grand.
Monte understood the significance
of the events at hand.
There he stood unflinching as the cross was pounded in.
I brought Monte back to the pasture.
He stood there looking out at the site,
while Ty, my new friesian met me with delight.
There, Ty stood staring into my eyes He seemed to understand the reason for the many many cries. The many cries he heard earlier that day
between me and my beautiful thoroughbred bay.
I felt my tears run down his velvet nose
as he reached down to kiss my face. I realized how lucky I am to be blessed with such beauty and such grace.
Lots of tears are cried today
Because I don't quite understand why my boy was taken away while here I am left to stand.©