What My Hamster Must Be Thinking

OK, I am really not a hamster whisperer. I don't exactly know what my hamster, Bella, is thinking. I know what she likes: eating, chewing, escaping, running, planning her next escape, hiding in shoes, searching for food, and climbing. However, what she is thinking is purely a mystery to me.

I do believe I have some ideas. After all, we've been living together for over two years and I feel like I have gotten to know her. I assume, in some ways, she must feel the same way about me. So although I cannot tell you exactly what she is thinking, I can imagine.

So, as I look at my hamster's cage (which I really need to clean, but I am procrastinating by writing this instead), I believe I know some of her thoughts.

Bella has no idea where her food comes from. She just knows she wakes up each evening and there is new food sitting there. I know she realizes I put it in her cage, but other than that, she has no knowledge of her food and how it came to exist in her cage. For all she knows, it just falls out the sky. She probably assumes it just arrives from nowhere. Perhaps she doesn't care at all... she just wants her food.

Apparently, the wheel must keep spinning at night. It is OK to rest every now and then, but it is important to keep the wheel spinning whenever possible. Running is essential for a hamster and only a slacker stops running in the wheel. Even better, the best hamsters add loud items to the wheel like wood chips or food to make it sound louder throughout the night. Silent wheels will not be tolerated in the hamster world!

No matter where Bella goes, there is always a TV. I have one in my livingroom and even two in my bedroom. On the rare occasion Bella gets to go on a trip, she sees televisions in every home. She must believe this is something of great importance. After all, people stop to stare at it no matter where they go. There is even a little remote control that goes along with it. Obviously, important and intelligent matters must be discussed in this box. Why else would people ever spend so much time with it?

No matter what Bella breaks, she knows she will get a new one. Usually she will not only get a nice replacement, she will something even better than she had before she destroyed it. Chew through a hamster house? Get a better hamster house. Break a wheel? Get a bigger wheel. It doesn't matter. In some ways, it must be really nice to be a hamster. As long as Bella is happy, so is everyone else.

In the hamster world, a cage is really a prison. This is why you will sometimes see hamsters gazing off and doing nothing. They are plotting their escape. When they are not plotting, they are attempting to escape. In their minds, the world outside the cage is ever so much better than the world in the cage. If only they knew!

I believe if my hamster were to share any thoughts with other hamsters out there (as if a hamster is reading this... or really, as if anyone at all is still reading this), she would say, "Never give up! One day, the cage door will be left open by accident. One day, the door on the hamster ball will become unlatched. Yes, one glorious day, it will happen for you, just as it has happened for me several times. When that day comes, leap out while you have the opportunity; find the first pair of cute shoes you see and crawl on in there!"

Bella must wonder why I even bother leaving the apartment Monday through Friday. She just knows I leave unhappy, and I return exhausted or angry. Sometimes she even watches me before I leave in the morning, and I could swear I see pity in her eyes. Bella knows I go out on the weekend and return a happier person with bags or friends. I am sure she wonders why I don't go to the happy place more than the bad place. The more and more I think about it, the more I wonder that, too. Maybe hamsters have the right idea, after all.

Copyright ©2011 Jeannieinabottle

Check out my eBook on hamsters being sold on Amazon: Tips on Finding a Missing Hamster