Hi and thank you to everyone who took the time to comment.
As an update, Bella, the dog I spoke up - well - we couldn't do anything about the mass. It was surgically just impossible to operate another time. Though she was just as alert and smart as ever and tried her best to do everything -she was spending almost all of her time in bed. She would drag herself out for the bathroom and to come be pet, but I was even feeding her in bed. She never lost her appetite or her need to be close and part of the family.
She had the most amazing will to live and strength like I have never seen in such a sick dog.
We ended up having her euthanized at home at the end of March. Needless to say, it was awful to do with a dog who hadn't lost one ounce of her fight to live. But she was having no kind of life and was on the brink of something horrible.
I am glad we did it at home where she was not afraid or stressed like she would have been at the vet. Though there is a sense that I betrayed her and I am still struggling with this.
I agree with Billrrrr - I think almost every night still that I would give everything to hug her one more time. I have even adopted another shelter dog -who I am learning to love and she is as sweet as can be. But I still say goodnight to Bella first. I will get there someday.
I really just want to thank you for the comments - it is very touching when people reach out and share - because on these pages and with these concerns - people are sharing from the heart and I can't tell you how much that is appreciated.
My heart goes out to all of you as well - because you have all loved your animals deeply and have suffered the same worry and grief.
If there is anything I can do for any of you - any questions or just someone to write your thoughts to, please feel free.