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Stupid Car Accessories

Updated on October 19, 2013

Some guys (and gals included) simply do not know how to style and accessorize a car properly. If you have the following on your car, it exhibits bad taste. Please, if you do have these on your car, understand that it's not improving the look at all. Quite frankly, it's funny, stupid, and downright ugly.

Stupid Car Accessory #1: Bumper Nuts

Seen the most on trucks. Maybe you've seen them on some muscle cars. As to why people put them on the car is a total mystery to me. Understood, maybe your car has "balls" and is fast. But this is plain old stupid! It is funny, though nothing else after.

Stupid Car Accessory #2:Large Spoilers or Wings

Large and ridiculous spoilers and wings don't belong on a car. They serve no purpose at all and are considered "rice." As a little known fact, spoilers rarely serve a function on normal daily driven cars. Maybe if you're an Indy car racer or drive NASCAR, then the wing surely serves a great function. But I seriously doubt that you'd be producing that much speed to need down-force assistance from a wing. And for a ridiculous wing that's larger than normal.

Stupid Car Accessory #3:Baby on Board Sign

Having a baby on board sign will not make me drive any better (or worse) around you. I'll still drive the same exact way.

Do you think having a "baby on board" sign will actually create a magical bubble around your car to protect you and your baby? Not at all likely.

Do we really need to know that you have a baby in your car?

Stupid Car Accessory #4:Stick Family Stickers

Ahhh....the stick figure family. Usually found on vans and larger SUV's and have been recently the trend to do. First of all, why even do this? Some go so far to put the names below the person or put their last name. Why? Do we really want to show people just how much kids or people are in the family? Nobody cares about your stick figure family.

Stupid Car Accessory #5:Fake Bullet Hole or Band-Aid Stickers

Was your car involved in a drive-by shooting? Would you want to give it that appearance? Well, these bullet hole stickers are the thing for you! Got an ouch moment on your car? Well, those band-aid stickers make it all better!

See how dumb these things look? If you have a dent or a scratch, simply covering it with these stickers actually makes it worse. Why? Because you're drawing attention to something on the car that isn't supposed to be there.

Stupid Car Accessory #6:Riding on Plastic Spinners

Someone decided that they liked spinners and decided to create these fake plastic spinners as hubcaps. Not everyone has a large truck or SUV, so these were the perfect idea for those who wanted to get into the game who had a car. Now, this is so stupid it's not even funny. It's so tacky. As to why someone would think this looks good is a mystery to me.

Stupid Car Accessory #7:Riding on REAL Spinners

No matter what anyone says, spinner wheels were never ever the trend or hot. This is mainly found on larger trucks and SUV's. The way these spinners work is when you're driving, the spinner is spinning via a roller bearing attached to the main wheel. When driving, the wheel produces kinetic energy and the wheels spins. When doing so, spinners serve no real functionality while moving. It's when the vehicle is stopped the "show" happens. I really don't understand the purpose of it. You can't even see them spinning while you're driving your car. Seems counter intuitive to spend so much money on something that you can't directly enjoy since you're driving the car.

Stupid Car Accessory #8:Fake Hood Scoops

I never understood why people place fake hood scoops on their car. I never understood why they think this modification actually will look or looks nice. The modification serves no purpose other than adding ugly to the car. The example seen to the right shows a typical "ricer" car (the Honda Civic) in which the owner thinks the hood scoops will magically make the car look nicer while giving increased horsepower. No.

While hood scoops are considered a functional accessory, it's not when it is fake. It's also no good when you place it on a Japanese vehicle. That's considered "rice." If putting a fake hood scoop on an American vehicle, that's not making it a hot rod. It's making it ugly.


Stupid Car Accessory #9:Large and Long Shift Knobs

Just what does a large and long shift knob accomplish? Sometimes referred to as the "dildo" shift knob, I can't really think of a positive for getting one, other than making your car looks stupid. This won't make you shift faster or make your car any faster. Aesthetically it might be interesting and is probably a better accessory because it's in the car as opposed to be overtly seen if it were on the outside. This is a dumb and stupid accessory.

Stupid Car Accessory #10:Urination Stickers

We've all seen them. And they were a huge trend with a huge following back in the day. But, why? Why would you want to be urinating on another car manufacturer? This just is a bad idea. People who have this on their cars are usually douches.

© 2013 jaydawg808


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