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The Model Line-up Of The New Merged GM & Chrysler: Part V - GMC

Updated on October 13, 2008

2009 GMC Acadia $31,890

It's a Chevrolet Equinox with a different badge! Who needs it?

KILL

2009 GMC Canyon $16,705

Hey, how about saying it again? It's a Chevrolet Colorado with a different badge! Who needs it?

KILL

2009 GMC Envoy $30,625

That was fun. One more time. It's a Chevrolet TrailBlazer with a different badge! Who needs it?

KILL

2009 GMC Savana $27,780

I'm getting used to saying it. It's a Chevrolet Express with a different badge! Who needs it? Chevy is not going to be in the van business. Let the much more capable and far more economic Dodge Sprinter take over the reins!

KILL

2009 GMC Savana Cargo $23,670

This is just a windowless version of the Savana. The same applies.

KILL

2009 GMC Sierra 1500 $18,575

Yes, it's back! It's a Chevrolet Silverado 1500 with a different badge! Who needs it? We don't even need the Silverado version of it. Dodge Ram are going to be the pickup trucks in the General Motors / Chrysler Corporation lineup!

KILL

2009 GMC Sierra 2500HD $25,445

Starting to sound like a broken record! It's a Chevrolet Silverado 2500HD with a different badge! Who needs it? We don't even need the Silverado version of it. Dodge Ram are going to be the pickup trucks in the General Motors / Chrysler Corporation lineup!

KILL

2009 GMC Sierra 3500HD $25,665

You didn't think I'd miss out on saying it again did you? It's a Chevrolet Silverado 2500HD with a different badge! Who needs it? We don't even need the Silverado version of it. Dodge Ram are going to be the pickup trucks in the General Motors / Chrysler Corporation lineup! Dang. I'm sure that there is an echo in here!

KILL

2009 GMC Yukon $36,455

Surprise! It's a Chevrolet Tahoe with a different badge! Did Chevy really think that they could fool anyone by moving the name from Nevada to Canada? Who needs it?

KILL

2009 GMC Yukon Hybrid $50,920

This is not a Hybrid. This is junk. Not only is it a Chevrolet Tahoe Hybrid with a different badge, but whoever called this aberration a Hybrid should be run out of town on a rail, preferably after a judicious application of tar and feathers.

KILL

2009 GMC Yukon XL $39,905

One last time to finish up GMC. It's a Chevrolet Suburban with a different badge! Not only doesn't anyone need it, nobody wants it, it should never have been produced, it should never have been sold to anyone other than Arab Oil Sheiks with their own refining facilities. This Godzilla should not just be retired, but all the remaining stock should have bullseyes painted on the sides and used for Army artillery target practice.

KILL

What is GMC anyway? We know that General Motors / Chrysler Corporation would be the newly combined General Motors and Chrysler , but GMC just stands for General Motors Corporation and is a survivor of the Depression Era trucks when they actually varied to some degree from their Chevrolet brethren. They've evolved over the decades into being entirely soulless clone ripoffs of the Chevrolet versions where only the bowtie is replaced by the GMC emblem. Perhaps in the olden days when GM had a viable dual model lineup with dealerships that sold only Chevrolet, Oldsmobile, Cadillac and Pontiac, Buick, GMC, then maybe GMC had a barely legitimate reason to exist. Now that many GM dealers have consolidated their product lines, the concept of model clonology has gone out the window. There was a time not so long ago when you could buy a GM car that was essentially rebadged as a Chevrolet, Oldsmobile, Pontiac, Buick, and even a Cadillac. They were exactly the same cars underneath the skin and in some hideous instances even the body panels were identical... does anyone remember the Cadillac Cimarron, that infamous "let's turn a cheap Chevy Cavalier into an expensive Cadillac and not spend more than $20 doing it"... or have you tried very hard to forget it? For some reason known only to GM marketing, that policy really did work for a while. Maybe it was because there's a sucker born every minute. However, this is a very different world that we live in today, and you can't pull the wool over the North American car buyer's eyes. When a vehicle carries a different name, it darn well better be a different vehicle. Consumers are far more analytical than they were in the age of bell bottom jeans and tie dyed T shirts! Therefore, GMC, your time has come and gone. You are now officially retired.

Continued in Part VI

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