ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Business and Employment»
  • Employment & Jobs

CCA Stumbling Blocks - How to Avoid Slips, Trips and Falls in Mail Delivery

Updated on July 30, 2016
Mel Carriere profile image

Although many are mystified by his mysterious moniker, Mel Carriere is a San Diego mailman who writes about the mail, among other things.

Every yard is a potential mine field of hazards.
Every yard is a potential mine field of hazards. | Source

Mail Delivery from the Ground up

Do you really want to know what it's like to be a letter carrier for the United States Postal Service? To answer this question, I'll open with a few lines from a Bubblews article I placed there on December 8, 2013. I contributed a lot of what I think was very good work on that devalued dinosaur cast in fools gold, and although they won't let me take any of it back I think it is only fair that I should be able to quote myself:

The opening line of the Alice in Chains song "The Rooster" goes "Ain't found a way to kill me yet..." Although I would never compare my day to day trials and tribulations as a letter carrier to the emotional trauma of the Vietnam war dealt with by this by this song, sometimes I find myself humming the tune as I go about my daily rounds. On a certain level the words seem to pertain to me.

— Mel Carriere - Bubblews 2013

The article was about the weather gods being especially brutal that day. I was boasting that no matter how hard the invisible forces of the Universe tried to take me out, I was still around to defy them with my verbal hubris. The reason I was feeling so smug is because I survived falling down not once, but twice on the same day; a day it rained heavily and every surface was slick, every step a potential tumbling plunge into an unknown abyss. I endured to shake my fists in defiance at the heavens, but I could very well have wound up in traction, or at least sidelined for months with a broken hamstring, as occurred with a co-worker of mine.

I have probably fallen at least a half dozen times during my postal career, but who's counting? I have fallen backwards, forwards, and perhaps sideways. In addition to the falls, which may only number in the single digits; there have been innumerable near misses, such as the one time I tripped over a skateboard ramp while delivering in the dark and deftly landed upon my feet like a cat. That was years ago, when I was still young and all of my joints and tendons were in good shape. The time is coming when I won't be so deft, a time that I've spent the last of my nine lives, a time when the expression "Help - I've fallen and I can't get up!" will be heard by my supervisor as I scream through my cell phone while laying prostrate upon the ground, unable to rise to my feet.

I have slipped on every possible surface. I have taken a couple of mud baths during heavy rainstorms that were not carried out for cosmetic purposes. I have crash landed on slick tile. My head has been battered by angry, sucker punching tree branches that leveled me out and had me staring up at the fluffy clouds from the grass beneath me. I have fallen flat upon my stomach, a tumble that bruised by my ribs with my own cell phone carried in my shirt pocket. I have tripped over roots, bricks, and buckling sidewalks.

You might be thinking I am just extraordinarily clumsy, because you, aspiring City Carrier Assistant are as graceful as Ginger Rogers. But believe me, although the Postal Service may have a monopoly on first class mail, I certainly don't have a monopoly on inelegant ungainliness. Plenty of my co-workers have gone down for the count, and some have stayed down for a while. In response to your smugness, I'll just say that there are two types of letter carriers - those who have fallen and those who will fall. So you would be wise to heed my words and read this very carefully, in the hope that you can minimize your time delivering mail from the flat of your back and avoid lost work days, which as a CCA means lost paychecks.

Think you're as graceful as Ginger Rogers?  A few weeks carrying mail should disabuse you of that notion.
Think you're as graceful as Ginger Rogers? A few weeks carrying mail should disabuse you of that notion. | Source

Mud and Grass

Mud sports can be fun, for example when you are in a seedy bar with a dozen drunken sailors, watching bikini clad women wrestle in a pit. The application of mud can be great for your complexion too, for example when you are stretched out on a beach chair with cucumbers over your eyes, getting a massage from a massive woman named Hilda whose former job was the East German swim team, until she got ejected for steroids. But when you are delivering mail for the United States Postal Service mud baths are no fun, especially when you are carrying a bundle of letters in your left hand and a bundle of flats on your left arm and a heavy bag of parcels that acts like an anchor, dragging you down deeper into the slippery quicksand.

i have fallen in the mud twice that I can remember, and maybe other times too that I can't remember, because banging my head hard after the fall permanently erased that location in my memory. The first time I fell in the mud was because i stupidly crossed a lawnless yard that turned into a quagmire after a rainstorm. I deliberately avoided crossing muddy yards after that, but slipped again on mud years later when my foot briefly touched a bare patch on a waterlogged lawn that turned into a land mine of gooey muck. Now, you might think you are the head hog mud roller in the postal pigpen, but my advice to you is to stay away from the stuff, unless you want to go home looking like you just emerged from the famous outhouse scene in Slum Dog Millionaire. You are allowed to bring the mail back for safety reasons, so bundle those letters up and beat a safe retreat. away from that sticky mess.

Grass is pretty much the same concept. I don't think I've fallen on wet grass yet, but I have slipped on it innumerable times. If you are not at home on skates, and don't want to go gliding across a slippery surface like a Russian ice skating duo, avoid soggy grass. It can be a pleasant, cushioned landing, but sometimes there are perils like tree roots and rocks concealed within the silky blades that can cause pain and perhaps worse.

Why did I ever sign up for this @#$! job!!!
Why did I ever sign up for this @#$! job!!! | Source

Branches and Other Low Hanging Hazards

I love trees. I love birds and I love squirrels and everything else that seeks shelter, safety, and sustenance within the stately boughs of an oak, maple, or whatever majestic wooded plant adorns your neighborhood. But somewhere along the line some imprudent letter carrier committed a grave, unforgivable affront against the kingdom of the trees, perhaps using a wide trunk for an emergency pit stop. Since then there has been a protracted state of unremitting warfare between mail carriers and trees, and the trees are winning. We letter carriers have lost all of the battles, even the minor skirmishes.

My favorite tree story comes from a time I was crossing a lawn and a tree struck me with an unprovoked left hook that pancaked me flat on my back. I lay there woozy for a moment or two, looking up at the beautiful clouds floating gently by, and I seriously think I would have pleasantly checked out if not for a passing motorist who yelled at me. "Are you okay?" she screamed from her car. I replied with a groggy "yes," dragged myself to my wobbling feet, picked up my satchel and my wounded pride and went about my business like nothing happened.

The trees have allies in their relentless skull bashing terrorist crusade against letter carriers. The old fashioned garage doors that swing out instead of rolling up are also potential sources of cranial trauma when left open. Even the top of the postal vehicle door can be a head banger's ball for altitude afflicted mailmen and ladies such as myself. I have bashed my own skull against it so many times I now have a permanent groove in my head.

If you are one of those people, like me, who can't make head nor tail of your immediate surroundings; you have a good head on your shoulders but your head is just not screwed on right; you'll fall head over heels because they just can't beat any sense into your thick head; or perhaps your head is stuck up a particularly dark portion of your anatomy, then do me a favor and forego the floppy hat in favor of the pith helmet. The Floppy hat may be more comfortable and breathe more easily, but the pith helmet functions as a crash helmet for those of us who are always knocking our noggin against fixed objects such as, oh yeah, hanging potted plants.

Pick the Pith Helmet - Save your Skull
Pick the Pith Helmet - Save your Skull | Source

Bricks is Love

Krazy Kat and his mischievous mouse friend ignatz notwithstanding, bricks do not equal love, whether they are being thrown in the air by a deranged rodent or they are surging upward to strike you because of the mutual force of gravitational attraction being you and the Earth. By bricks I am basically including everything that serves the function of pavement; whether this be the rough edging stones that jut up to scrape and pound an elbow or the slick patio tile that seems to have no functional purpose other than to put the mailman in traction when it gets wet in a storm.

Unlike grass, which tends to yield softly and politely when your body makes contact with it; bricks, stones and tile tend to be cantankerous in nature and unresistant to your advances. Just last winter I slipped on the wet decorative tile on a front porch and crashed down hard on my scanner, which was in my back pocket. The delicate electronics in the device did not react well to being sandwiched between 230 pounds of man flesh and the unyielding planet, and it began to flicker madly and spit out gibberish. I had to call the supervisor to get a replacement.

Loose bricks used for ornamental pavement can also snag your tender tootsies and cause you to stumble, fall, or wrench an ankle, knee, or shoulder when you twist your body to regain balance. I recommend walking slowly and carefully across these areas, and any place you come across slick or broken ground covering. You don't want to risk being the star of a viral You Tube video that shows you squirming like a flipped over turtle as amused postal patrons look out the window and enjoy the blooper reel.

When doing door to door delivery, beware of brick throwing mice.
When doing door to door delivery, beware of brick throwing mice. | Source

Miscellaneous Missteps

It is exhausting, not to mention exhaustive, to think of all of the ways I and my coworkers have fallen while wearing the postal blue. Years ago I slipped on the slick yellow paint of a speed bump, and emerged with a hairline fracture in my pelvis a year later that my doctor assured me came from that hard fall square upon my rump. A coworker tripped over a landscaping railroad tie that a customer had just recently flung across his usual path to the mailbox. This mishap kept him out of work for months. Sometimes your feet know the way but your eyes should nonetheless remain vigilant to avoid changing conditions in the landscape such as this. While working in an older part of town some time ago I buckled a knee when I stepped in a deep hole in a sidewalk. That particular strained and battered joint still doesn't bend all the way, like it should. And then, just a couple days ago, while contemplating potential mishaps for this article, I slipped and nearly fell on a clump of the hard seed balls dropped by our locally common pepper trees. Another coworker of mine fell when he slipped on the spiky seed pods of a sweet gum tree that were strewn across the sidewalk. All of these are hazards that you, Mr. Fred Astaire or Ms. Ginger Rogers City Carrier Assistant, should take note of and avoid.

I'm sure I'll think of a dozen other encumbrances, stumbling blocks, and impediments after I log off here, but is there any point in adding to an already exhaustive list that includes just about everything, including yard art gnomes that jump out to bite you and garden hoses that seem to come from nowhere and loop around your feet like boa constrictors? Just identify everything as a potential pratfall, don't get swept off your feet in the rush to get the mail delivered on time, don't be the fall guy or gal for an organization that only values you when you are chugging along at full steam, and in this way you won't start off on the wrong foot in your fledgling postal career. Good luck to you, and may all your sidewalks be dry and swept clean, and all your mailbox paths unimpeded.

In memory of letter carrier Daniel Duka, who carried his last swing in October 2015. A great coworker and friend. You are missed already.

Rate Your Job Safety

Compared to what you have read here about Mail Delivery, how does your job compare safety wise?

See results

A nice diversion from the drudgery of postal life - Rooster by Seattle band Alice in Chains

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      New boise CCA 21 months ago

      Excellent reading

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Thank you Boise CCA. It's going to get slick there soon. Watch your step.

    • ocfireflies profile image

      ocfireflies 21 months ago from North Carolina

      Mel,

      What a beautiful tribute to your friend. You sir are an amazing writer. I am surprised that you do not have your own column running nationwide. I love this for your ability to write with such ease while making me laugh as well. I live in a rural area where mail is delivered by carriers in cars. I would like to share my own mailman story. When I was pregnant with my second child, in order to have his older brother feel part of the new addition to the family, his father and I agreed to let him name his new sibling. He wanted to name him, "Bill" after our mailman-smiles. Bill always was giving my son candy. While Bill is a fine name, I thought it my raise some eyebrows-smiles. So, little bro got "Joseph" instead-partly because big bro wanted his brother not to have a weird name like him-spelled "Schuylar" pronounced Skyler.

      Shared and pinned my friend.

      Kim

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Thank you Kim for the wonderful words. That is a charming story, I think you made a wise choice with the name. I'm glad I could make you laugh. I appreciate you dropping in!

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 21 months ago from Queensland Australia

      This hub was a pleasure to read Mel. You make the trials and tribulations of a mail carrier so interesting. I know you aren't joking when you describe the obstacles and falls involved in the job. I am very susceptible to the low hanging tree branch, even the open trunk of a car etc and have obtained numerous lumps, gashes and almost been knocked unconscious more times than I can recall. A job fraught with danger indeed. (You may like to reread your quote from Bubblews). Well done.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Thank you Jodah. I assume you are a tall man. To tall people especially every moment spent on our feet is a potential head banger. I appreciate you dropping in.

    • sgbrown profile image

      Sheila Brown 21 months ago from Southern Oklahoma

      I love your writing Mel! This was indeed a pleasure to read. I'm sure most people are unaware of all the pitfalls of being a postal carrier and perhaps this will make them think before leaving some of those low hanging branches! You had me smiling more times than I can count this morning and I thank you for that! Have a safe and wonderful day, my friend!

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Thank you Sheila for the lovely words. I'm glad I could make you smile while increasing your awareness. Have a lovely day my friend.

    • CorneliaMladenova profile image

      Korneliya Yonkova 21 months ago from Cork, Ireland

      Amazing story and very kind words for your friend. I love our local postal carriers, all of them are so good and friendly. These people deserve respect. :)

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 21 months ago from Olympia, WA

      Loved this story, and I'm with Kim when she says you are an amazing writer. I think I mentioned that at one time I wanted to be a mail carrier...but the more I think about it, in western Washington, that would be one seriously wet job. I'm glad I chose teaching. :)

    • profile image

      Pat Mills 21 months ago from East Chicago, Indiana

      At least you don't have to master the fine art of offloading a pallet on a small dock without losing the load - or your balance. I just don't have an obstacle course filled with many perils.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 21 months ago from LOS ANGELES

      And here I thought the life of the mail carrier was a dream. Taking long leisure walks while delivering mail. Driving scenic routes and enjoying nice views, and my favorite was- no annoying supervisor over your shoulder always wanting to know what you were doing. I thought the worst part was having to use those yucky public restrooms. Well, Mel Carriere you certainly set me straight.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Thank you Cornelia for reading and your nice words for my friend Dan, who left us way too young.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      My Dad was a life long educator Bill, and there were days when I think he would gladly exchange dealing with kids and parents for a walk in the rain. Every job has its stumbling blocks, even gentleman farmer slash freelance writer. Thanks for the nice words.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      I'm sure your job is walking a razor's edge too, Mills P. We all put our butts on the line every time we walk out the door. Thanks for reading!

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      I think the job has changed a lot, Dana Tate. These days they are running us ragged, which leads to taking shortcuts and sometimes accidents. Now we have the pocket supervisor, which is our scanner GPS. The job ain't what it used to be. Thanks for reading!

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 21 months ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Great stuff here! The job has changed you got to be aware of your next step. Thank you for this hub.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      Every step id potential disaster Davika. Thank you for dropping by and reading!

    • Larry Rankin profile image

      Larry Rankin 21 months ago from Oklahoma

      Certainly a number of hazards for the postal worker.

      Some jobs I've worked that may be more dangerous: I've done farm work and have worked on a busy dock.

      As always, an interesting read.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      I don't doubt that farm work is dangerous Larry. A nephew of mine died when he fell off a tractor. Unfortunately, navigating through busy, cluttered docks are part and parcel of mail delivery as well. No matter how much they drill safety into our heads, it always takes second place to profits. Thanks for voicing in from SWOK!

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 21 months ago from Stillwater, OK

      I voted about the same. I slipped on a tomato slice about a year ago, and was out of work for two weeks, as I really cracked my kneecap hard. Being a professional dancer, Workman's Comp was very careful and made certain that I got the best of care. I am fine, but it could have ended a lot worse.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      I didn't know this secret dancing part of your repertoire Deb. Fascinating. As a postscript, just yesterday I tripped on a low step and nicked my elbow when I stumbled into a metal rail. It's always something. Thanks for reading!

    • lawrence01 profile image

      Lawrence Hebb 21 months ago from Hamilton, New Zealand

      Mel

      Reading your 'scrapes' (pretty much literal in some cases) reminded me of the daily dodging the 'lunatic' car drivers we people working outside have to deal with.

      I probably have at least one 'close encounter' every day and that's being extra vigilant!

      Great hub.

      Lawrence

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 21 months ago from San Diego California

      I'm sure you get your share of crazies on the bus too, Lawrence, that you have to keep your eye on. Every job has its unique, specific set of dangers. Thanks for reading!

    • profile image

      mike 15 months ago

      I fell on an uneven slate sidewalk only in the first week of being a new CCA, still nursing the scab on back of hand, and elbow. Package and scanner where fine.

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 15 months ago from San Diego California

      I wish I could sit down and count all my falls, Mike. This job is going to take its toll on you. Be careful, thanks for reading.

    • profile image

      Sumathgeek 9 months ago

      I have encountered a few yards with holes slightly hidden under grass.....

    • Mel Carriere profile image
      Author

      Mel Carriere 9 months ago from San Diego California

      That's another good one Sumathgeek. Thanks for reading and contributing.

    Click to Rate This Article