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Confidence is not just how you feel about yourself

Updated on February 14, 2013

Type A personalities are over-rated

There is always at least one guy or girl in the office who struts around as if the world was created just for them and we are all bit players in their personal life production. We admire them, we smile and say hi when they recognize us, we feel slighted if they don't notice us, and secretly behind their backs, we all hate them. I mean come on, how could anyone be so confident? Why can't I?

No amount of self help books or silly praise mantras said to the mirror will ever make you confident, so stop wasting your time, energy and money. This does not mean that you are completely hopeless. It just means that you have to broaden your view of confidence to include the people around you and your relationships with them.

There are two types of type A people. The first are confident because they have an awareness of self, which stems from an acceptance of their weaknesses and a focus on their strengths, and a knowledge of those around them and their strengths and weaknesses. The other type are those who are confident simply because they are conceited. This blind confidence can be very destructive and usually leaves a trail of bodies in its wake. Many of us have been the victim of this personality type, who in the persuit of their own personal goals, have sacrificed the people who either work with them or for them.

You do not have to be a type A person to be confident. You may be timid and reserved at work, but are you the same way with your friends? No? Well why not? It is simply a matter of trust and through building trust, you can build your own confidence.

Not the landing we expected...

If we all work together we can right this thing!
If we all work together we can right this thing!

Group confidence as a by-product of trust

In modern American society, too much focus is put on the individual and not enough is placed on the group. We have to understand that one will never be confident in the workplace, if you are constantly afraid that your co-worker is going to stab you in the back. Everyone will be more confident once trust has been established and we accept each other for what we are. If you feel that this is an impossibility, then I suggest you get out as fast as you can because you are putting yourself in a situation that will never yield the outcome you seek.

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