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Are Men Dumb?

Updated on May 16, 2011
Oh, don't look so surprised.
Oh, don't look so surprised. | Source

Are men dumb? This is an eternal question; one that certainly must be addressed.

As an expert in playing dumb, general stupidity, and the particular stupidity of womankind, I think I just might be the person to tackle this issue.

Though you might argue that I am biased, being of female build, I promise you that I shall explore this subject with professional indifference, and leverage my female perspective in the name of scientific exploration, not vindictive posturing.

Now let's not tiptoe around this issue.

Men are dumb.

There is no getting around that one. Don't get me wrong, guys. You're fine just as you are. And I'm sure you wouldn't want to switch over to the other side. When it comes to male stupidity, we simply have to face the facts. The evidence follows.

Plotting your demise
Plotting your demise | Source

They Fall for Women

As a woman myself, I feel it is my right to say that this propensity that many men have is definitely dumb. Do you have any idea what you’re getting into? I would like to think that men don’t realize the folly of falling for the ladies… but no doubt they have been well informed.

Warning stories expounding on the dangers of having a weakness for women have been around for thousands of years. If you don’t believe me, take a second to think about it. Consider all of the epic fails men have achieved due to this flaw.

Perhaps we can start with the downfall of Eden. Boy, if Adam hadn’t ditched Eve when he had the chance, maybe mankind would still be living the good life.

But maybe you don’t go for biblical stuff, which is fine. So let us consider another (albeit) less ancient epic fail brought on by a man’s love for a woman: Troy. Boy what a train wreck. Thanks Paris. You really helped a lot of folks by falling for that Helen chick. Way to go.

And let’s not forget our dear Romeo, who had everything going for him- that is, until he thought it would be awesome to fall for a girl (and not only a girl, but the one girl he really shouldn’t have fallen for).

Even when relationships work out, are they really smart moves on men’s parts? If they fall in love and get attached, they make themselves weak and exposed (think of all the “heroic” men who have put their lives on the line to saved their damsels). If they don’t really fall in love, but still get sucked into the lust thing enough to get married, they get stuck in a bad relationship.

And must we ignore the fact that these are women men are falling for? Moody, mercurial, manipulative women? Is it really a good idea to intertwine one’s fate and happiness with these specimens? I mean… it’s fine that men do, but dogs have a much better track record in the loyalty and undying love department, so if men want companionship, the smart move would be to go with one of those. Technically speaking, mental attachments and relationships are not needed for… er- other needs.

It is suffice to say that I could go on and on with this argument, but to spare you time and to spare me carpel tunnel syndrome, let’s just leave it at this: falling for women is a dumb move.


They Fight

I don’t want to play up stereotypes, but women have a much better reputation in the consensus-building department than their male counterparts. And male counterparts have historically had a tendency to spark fights, be more competitive, and wage wars. This is just how things have played out so far.

What’s up with that? Fights hurt! Fights are inefficient! Fights are damaging! That men seem to get a kick out of dueling it out is rather nonsensical. Obviously conflict is inevitable, but there are so many ways one can work through problems. One can talk it out, for example. Or one can simply walk away from one’s pig-headed opponent. Women seem to be pretty good at doing this. But men…. Well, the particularly silly thing is that many of them seem to get a real kick out of fighting. If there is no conflict, they’ll stir some up, just to brighten their days. And that’s pretty dumb.

While unnecessary fighting is inane, damaging, and sad, I do, however, want to make it clear that I do not condone the end of all fighting. It may be stupid, but it sure is entertaining.

Dreadful mess, that.
Dreadful mess, that. | Source

They've Got Honor / Ego Issues

Many fights and wars are waged over delusions of grandeur stemming from the male ego, which strikes me as quite the dumb characteristic.

One of the most salient demonstrations of male ego and false sense of honor is seen with 18th century duels fought over a woman or man’s honor. While there might be some logical sense in fighting for one’s life, liberty, or property, there is pretty much no logical sense in dying for one’s honor- let alone the honor of some sniveling female (back to that whole “falling for women” weaknesses). That men seem to have some desire for this false sense of honor and importance is painfully stupid.

Orly? | Source

They Take On Positions of Power

It goes without saying that men have enjoyed more positions of power than their female counterparts over the years. What suckers!

While men sit on their high thrones and feel very big and important, women are snickering behind their backs. Why? Because:

  1. They’re doing all the grunt work of ruling the world
  2. They’re taking all the blame for screwing up the world

What chumps! While men have worked hard and taken all the blame for our generally corrupt and monstrous species, women have been able to sneak around and pull strings behind the scenes without catching much flack at all.

Perhaps the garnering of glory that leads to man’s hunger for power stems from the ego issue discussed above. But there seems to be something more to it than that- a genuine yearning for power that extends from a desire, on the individual level, for a strong body, all the way to a strong need for control over others that emanates from entire male-dominated governments.

What makes hunger for power dumb? The simple reality that power is an illusion.

Don't worry. You're in good company.
Don't worry. You're in good company. | Source

Sorry to Brake it To You

I don’t like saying mildly negative things about groups to which I don’t belong, so I’ll bring this argument to a close while admitting that there is much more one could say to argue the point.

The gist is this: men are indeed dumb, and the evidence abounds. I’m sorry. It would be great if they were sharper, but hey, there’s something to be said for adorable weaknesses and room for improvement.

If you happen to be male and feel a bit miffed about my thesis, please take these two modest concessions:

  1. Humans in general are rather dumb
  2. You’re not the only gender that happens to lack mental capacity


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    • sofs profile image


      9 years ago

      Great argument there Simone, I cannot but agree with the fine points you make here.. LOL Honestly they need to 'listen to the women snickering behind their backs for taking the blame of screwing up the world.' 'Megalomaniacs'

      Thanks for the laughs!!

    • Simone Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Simone Haruko Smith 

      9 years ago from San Francisco

      Hahaa! Well, so far as I'm concerned, it's good to be dumb. It works well for me at least!

    • Alastar Packer profile image

      Alastar Packer 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Ms. Smith you bring it on home like a knife...and the only thing sharper than that is this superb trip through the historical record and your takes on the situation. The consolation of two modest concessions helps, but truth sure can hurt, ouch! :D

    • Patty Inglish, MS profile image

      Patty Inglish MS 

      9 years ago from USA and Asgardia, the First Space Nation

      I am dumstruck by this subject matter and must now take a long nap...

    • Simone Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Simone Haruko Smith 

      9 years ago from San Francisco

      Thanks for stopping by, tsmog! I hope this helps :D

      And I think that older gentleman was totally right, Wesman Todd Shaw. Totally, totally right.

    • Wesman Todd Shaw profile image

      Wesman Todd Shaw 

      9 years ago from Kaufman, Texas


      An older "gentleman" that I used to run around with used to say, "nobody understand women except for other women - and they don't like them."

      While I might have all of those totally dumb ideas about how nice it would be to have a woman around all of the time. . . . .the truth is that I can live without them.

      I just need a visit here and there.

    • tsmog profile image

      Tim Mitchell 

      9 years ago from Escondido, CA

      thanks Simone , , ,bookmarked for when I need an argument breaker for the question "why did you do that?" Now, I have a defense argument :)

    • Simone Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Simone Haruko Smith 

      9 years ago from San Francisco

      Aye, Cagsil... it was hard finding an appropriate category for this one! I'll have to check out you poem. And I don't think you're one of the dumb ones. Though as one of the dumb iterations of the female gender, I cant' help but feel a pang of sorrow for you... being dumb is fun!

      True, Mark Ewbie, you're certainly not.

      And you've got to watch out for those submissive smiles, secularist10! They're designed to cover vicious fangs!

      About the college skew thing- yeah, I find it to be particularly disturbing. Obviously I'm happy to see women doing well in the educational field, but I would prefer a level playing field. And besides... what's the dating market going to be like in college when all the poor girls have to fight for the good guys? The pickin's are slim enough as it is. Sheesh.

      Here's hoping that American men see a major comeback. Thanks for the insightful comment!

    • secularist10 profile image


      9 years ago from New York City

      Wow, that girl's submissive smile near the top is irresistible--how could she be anything but an angel? Oh damn, guess you got me again! Haha!

      Indeed, the smartest men in history have learned to focus on sex, and leave love to the women!

      Unfortunately for everyone in America, things may very well get worse before they get better in the coming years for the male race. Every year a new crop of college grads emerges, ever-more skewed toward the female gender. Women have been slowly but surely (true feminine form) making headway in advanced degrees, income, wealth, independence and power. The more progress they make, the less they need men--socially, reproductively, economically (emotionally?).

      America has a lot of unresolved issues when it comes to manhood in the 21st century world, and until those are resolved, we may very well see significant amounts of male high school dropouts, crime, gangs and other destructive behavior. The great thing about men is that concentrated passion and energy comes more naturally to us. But in the absence of some constructive or healthy outlet, that energy results in problems for everyone.

      The smartest, strongest and most confident men will continue to do well (and continue to get most of the women), as they always have. But the more humble majority are increasingly directionless.

      I don't know exactly what the answer is for American men, but Europe probably has some lessons to offer.

    • Mark Ewbie profile image

      Mark Ewbie 

      9 years ago from UK

      I'm not so dumb as to be hooked into reading and then leaving a comment.

    • Cagsil profile image

      Raymond D Choiniere 

      9 years ago from USA

      Hey Simone, I will agree that some men are dumb and some are just stupidity in motion altogether. However, considering where you put this hub(category), then I would have to say that your entire hub is irrelevant, as it doesn't actually approach a Man, on the basis of business. I found the hub funny in some aspect, but I am not one of the dumb ones you will find. I wrote a poem about "Women", and you might consider reading it, to get my gist and understanding of both sexes. :)

    • Simone Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Simone Haruko Smith 

      9 years ago from San Francisco

      You're so right, Lesleysherwood. We're all pretty dumb, and if we're skilled at one thing as a race, it's making a big mess!!

      Excellent point, bernieadkins. Though I can definitely say that both genders play dumb to get out of things / get what they want. I play dumb all the time! Though... I also just AM dumb...

      Hehee, thnaks Angie Jardine!

      And A guy, my hat is off to you. You are technically right! Men *do* take on most positions of power these days. And I don't know about the other ladies out there, but I totally drool.

    • profile image

      A guy 

      9 years ago

      Obviously this Hub is completely wrong.

      Boys rule, girls drool!

    • Angie Jardine profile image

      Angie Jardine 

      9 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

      Great hub, Simone ... and so true!

    • bernieadkins profile image


      9 years ago from Virginia


      I don't think all men are dumb. In fact I think most men are like my husband and act dumb to get out of doing things like paying bills, returning phone calls, house work, etc...

      Pretty smart I'd say.

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      Ha Ha. I voted UP. I'm impressed with your bravery writing this article and you're right about Adam. It was all OK till THAT WOMAN came along.

      I've always felt woman 'let men THINK they wear the pants lol'. No - seriously, we're as dumb as each other in reality. Look at the mess of this world.

    • Simone Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Simone Haruko Smith 

      9 years ago from San Francisco

      Heheee thanks s.carver!!!

      And not to worry, BennyTheWriter. All genders a equally dumb in my eyes. They just happen to be dumb in different ways. Hence the connected articles. Are men dumb? Of course! Are women dumb? Most certainly. I may have added that zinger at the end of the article on female stupidity just to give gals an extra wee push, seeing as they've got more bias against their intellect ;)

      Agreed, Ancillotti - all men do not have equal intellect, and some are WAY WAY WAY smarter than the average woman. Though yeah... the weakness men have for women is pretty undeniable. And the power thing sure has gotten them in trouble in the past heheee :D

      And isn't that sad how men tend to fall for women who don't respect them, KoffeeKlatch Gals? You're so right though... women make silly choices (often of the same sort), too. And damn those hormones!

      And LOLOL that cartoon does sound vaguely familiar, writeronline! That sums it up, hahaa!

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      Hi Simone,

      The never-ending battle of the sexes.....but as men, we brought it all on ourselves:

      Did you ever see the cartoon where two cavemen are standing by the open fire, hot roasted animal joints in hand, one’s about to drag his woman home by the hair, and says to the other guy “She’s got this cooking thing down, now I’m gonna teach her to talk. Hey, what harm can it do?”

      Love your work, Simone. (Not to mention your avatar..!)

    • KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

      Susan Hazelton 

      9 years ago from Sunny Florida

      Simone, you made some pretty valid points. Especially about the man falling in love. For some reason they find the women who will tear them into little pieces. Now that I've said that, women can also make equally dumb choices. Hormones can be a terrible thing. Love the way you ended your article. We all are equally not smart. Rated up and funny. Thanks for the laugh.

    • Ancillotti profile image


      9 years ago from Brasil, Vitoria - ES

      I do not believe that all men are equal and so burrros, but some things you're right Simone: when we fall in love for women there is no salvation for our brain, stop thinking (but not our fault that God has created all so wonderful !) And yes we want to be always in command, it must be some genetic flaw ...

      Do not know if era'intenção, but I found your hub very funny, made me give a few laughs.

      Thanks and cheers, Simone!

    • BennyTheWriter profile image


      9 years ago from Northeastern U.S.A.

      Wow...I guess I'm dumb then. Guilty as charged. As a guy, I was going to put up quite the, er, defense (I was going to say "fight," but...) and then I realized that pretty much everything you say about our "side of the fence" is true. More or less.

      And another thing that made me feel better was your admission in those last two points (which I kind of feel are ONE point, but I dunno? I'm not smart enough to tell)...and then I clicked on the blue text, which I took to be a hyperlink to another page on the Internet, like this one (yay, I was correct!)...and to my delight, it was your treatise on the dumbness of women!

      And then I read the words: "But not nearly as dumb as men." Now, I'm just totally lost and confused.

      Way to go Simone :-) I think you achieved your objective, whatever it was (I'll figure it out one of these days)!

    • s.carver profile image


      9 years ago from San Francisco

      Good points here, Simone. Very SMART points. haha


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