ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Empathic Listening

Updated on February 27, 2015

It is the power to understand deeply and completely, both emotionally and intellectually what the other person expresses, not only with our ears, but with our heart; it should be done with an attentive hearing, before trying to be understood.

In other words, it is putting yourself in the place of the other, to better experience his views and beliefs. In fact, you should keep in mind that empathy does not mean that you agree, but that you hear deeply what is being told to you, both with reason and emotion, which leads to the development of the skill of assertiveness.

Most people do not listen with the intention to understand others, but simply for the fact to prepare for an answer or to find an advantageous answer. What we mean with this is that if we want to be understood, we must first understand others as we were listening to our own interests, conflicts and joys.

In communicating with other people, we focus on our own reasons, those that emerge from our own experience, under alleged thoughts, feelings, motives and personal interpretations with which we address the reality within the head and heart of the other person. We want to be understood. Our conversations become collective monologues, and we never really understand what is going on inside another human being.

Among the talks without empathic listening we can include:

• Sports.

• Religion.

• Politics.

There are four levels of listening:

To listen ignoring the speaker, you do not hear at all, you pretend to, and you even use words such as "Yes. Ya. Right."

Selective listening, it has to do with listening to only certain parts of the conversation. Often we do it with the incessant chatter of a toddler.

Careful listening, you pay attention and concentrate your energy on the words being spoken.

Empathic listening, it is the highest listening level where there is a sincere intention to understand the speaker. Empathic communication is truly essential and crucial in our lives, because through this process we define who we are, the assertive power of communication lies in the vast capacity of generating change and action.

Similarly, communication and language define and reveal who you are and with this I mean that they not only define your verbal communication, but also your nonverbal communication; they define you, what you read, what you speak, what you write and above all, they give you a definite value, the ability to listen to generate empathic relationships.

Therefore, the interpretation in communication will be:

• 10% is communicated with words.

• 30% are sounds.

• 60% is body language.

To develop the skills of empathic listening, you should take into account the level of awareness in conversations. Therefore:

• Watch carefully your body position when you listen, is it open, closed, relaxed or disinterested.

• Analyze how your feelings are when you listen, is it of interest, attention or connection.

• What are your perceptions, what do you sense and how are your emotions in the dialogue.

• Last, ask, inquire and get accurate data for your conversation to be fluid and your communication assertive and effective.

Remember that empathic communication is a possibility to give air and vitality to the relationship, since there are two people communicating freely and openly to create uplifting relationships free of arrogance where human beings express their communication needs.

In the next conversation you have, spend 100% listening to other people, practice the above steps. Keep in mind that it is essential to understand the feelings, emotions, and reasons of the other person for this person to feel valued, secure, and appreciated by you.



    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)