The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Female Villain
There aren't nearly enough female villains in the world. It is disappointing, really. Women have so much potential. And besides, being evil is good fun.
Perhaps women have a higher propensity to be good because they are expected to be more empathetic, nurturing, and consensus-conscious.
Perhaps they are simply more practical and have learned that one can generally get more of what one wants by playing by the rules than by breaking them.
But let's say you drop the female-goody-goody act and take a turn at being sinister.
Here are some tips on perfecting your dark side so that your evil legacy can rival those of ALL villains- male and female alike.
Creating a Strong Identity
Nobody is going to learn to fear you if they cannot even remember you. To make your way as an evil woman, you shall need to create a strong personal brand.
This entails not only choosing an excellent evil name, but carefully packaging your backstory and personality as well.
To get started with putting your evil self together, consider these questions:
- Where did you come from?
- Where are you going?
- What are you doing here?
- What is your name?
- Why should we care?
Establishing Your Motivation & Mission
A large part of a good evil woman's identity involvers her raison d'être.
After all, every evil woman is evil for a reason and has some sort of evil purpose. If she didn't she'd just be another lost soul trying to make ends meat.
So what are your evil origins? And what are your sinister ambitions?
These questions may help you to get started:
- Who screwed you over?
- What bit/possessed/controls you?
- Who do you detest?
- Who stole something from you?
- What ruined your life?
- What obsession overcomes you?
- What overwhelming desire do you have?
Establishing Your Special Skills
There have been many a sinister woman with no talent, but none of these wretched people have been worth remembering.
If you want any real shot at making it as an evil woman, you shall have to develop some skills.
Some evil women go for natural skills, others have superpowers. Here are some of the more popular choices:
- High levels of intelligence
- Cold, hard ambition
- Hacking skills
- Combat skills
- Valuable connections
- Emotional intelligence
- Sheer depravity
- Sharp nails/teeth
More on that final skill in the next section.
To Be Sexy, or Not To Be Sexy
... That is the qestion.
Nobody can deny that most of the beloved female supervillains (and heroes, for that matter) we know and admire today are rather sexy. In fact, many of them use their sexuality as a weapon, or at least a secondary skill in their impressive arsenal of sinister abilities.
Some call the exploitation of one's sexuality cheating or a cop out; others call it smart and efficient use of one's resources.
Whether you think fighting with your sexiness is cheating or not, you shall have to decide whether or not you shall be a sexy villain. And stick to whatever policy you establish.
If you decide to take the sexy route, you'll have to decide what kind of sexy villain you shall be. Here are some common looks you might go for:
- Animalistic (in a sexy way, e.g. catwoman)
- The sexy librarian look
- The girl next door getup
- The sexy nurse look (Think Darrell Hannah in Kill Bill)
- The schoolgirl look (Think Gogo in Kill Bill)
- The typical DC Comics / Marvel super hero/villain look (skintight/short whatever outfit)
- The cheerleader getup
- The oh-look-my-clothes fell off getup
- The oh-look-I'm-a-shapeshifter-I-can-be-whatever-you-like look
- The Alias I'm-a-spy-and-love-to-dress-up look
- The giantess (oh, god. why am I writing these???)
Alternately, if you decide to not take the sexy route, you'll have to decide just what kind of un-sexy you want to be. You might consider being...
- Scary as hell
- Very large
- Very emaciated (think Cruella)
- Animalistic (in a not sexy way, e.g. human warewolf)
- Utterly obscured behind a mask / costume / machinery
- Never present in person
- A robot (and not a sexy one)
- ... now that I think of it, it's harder to be not sexy as a female villain than sexy as a female villain. Pity, that. If you have ideas on this end, be a dear and help me out by sharing them in the comments.
If I have insulted your feminist sensibilities, take my words with a grain of salt. After all, I have a large apron collection and do not believe in wearing pants. But also keep in mind that I also collect knives. Big. Sharp. Knives. And little switchblades.
Dress to Impress
Once you have established a strong evil image for yourself, it is important that you uphold it by dressing appropriately. Remember, as an evil woman, there are no days off. There will be no grocery store runs in a velour jumpsuit or an old college sweatshirt and jeans. No, you shall have to ALWAYS keep up appearances.
So pick a costume- a uniform of evilness, as it were. And make sure it's comfortable, because you'll have to wear it. All. The. Time.
So you've got an image, a look, a history, and a mission.
Now it's time to spring into action. Carry out your evil plans, and never give up; never surrender! To make it as a female villain, you'll have to do evil early and often. Perhaps you can make evildoing easier by making a routine of it, or scheduling things in an organized fashion.
No matter what you do, just remember this: your adversaries are not your enemies; inactivity is.