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Great and funny customer service quotes

Updated on March 31, 2014
Customer service is very important for each company!
Customer service is very important for each company! | Source

The life of people working in customer service is not easy. They work hard and try to help everyone who calls them – no matter whether it is a real or a pretty ridiculous problem. In the following article, I have tried to collect some of the most funny customer service quotes ever born in history.

Please keep in mind, that ALL dialogues are real (from Hungary), none of them were just ‘made up’. May cause laughter!

C means Customer, while S represents Customer Service.

PROBLEMS WITH THE COMPUTER

Yes, having a computer can be nasty sometimes...

Customer servicing is a hard job
Customer servicing is a hard job | Source

1.

  • S: What kind of OS do you have?
  • C: I have no idea.
  • S: What do you see when you turn the computer on?
  • C: Nothing, it just starts.
  • S: Can you please restart the computer to see?

deep silence

  • S: What did you see when the computer started up?
  • C: Nothing yet, I still see the ‘Windows is shutting down…’ screen…

2.

  • C: I am unable to print.
  • S: Then Click on the ‘Start’ button and…
  • C: Fine, now listen mate, don’t start speaking to me in this special computer lingo, I’m not Bill Gates, damn!

3.

  • C: I am unable to connect to the internet!
  • S: Are you sure you have entered the correct password?
  • C: Yes, I saw my colleague while he entered it!
  • S: Erm… what was the password he entered?
  • C: Five stars!

Just a call - but can worth much more!
Just a call - but can worth much more! | Source

4.

  • C: My keyboard is not working. Can you help me?
  • S: Hopefully I can. Are you sure it is plugged in into the computer?
  • C: No, I am not as I can’t see the back of the computer.
  • S: Well, then pick up the keyboard and go 10 feet away from the PC.
  • C: I am done, what now?
  • S: Now we can be sure that your keyboard is NOT plugged in. Go back to your desk. Are you sure there are no more keyboards around you on the desk?
  • C: Okay… ohh, there’s one! … Wow, and it is working!

5.

  • C: I wanted to write my first e-mail. But I have encountered a huge problem.
  • S: Yes, what is your problem?
  • C: I have found the letter ‘a’ on the keyboard, but I am unable to draw the little circle around it (@)…

PROBLEMS WITH THE TELEPHONE

Smartphone or not it is still hard to cope with!

Evaluation of the customer service
Evaluation of the customer service | Source

1.

  • C: I would like to see the balance on my phone, and I am supposed to enter some kind of cross or what, that I cannot find on my phone.
  • S: Yes, you have to push the hashmark sign that is on the bottom of your keyboard.
  • C: Okay… but which one is that? The little snowflake or the ladder?

2.

  • C: Good afternoon! I wanted to enter my PIN, but all I see are little stars!
  • S: That is totally normal. As the PIN is supposed to be a secret code, no one else should see or know it, only you.
  • C: But then how am I supposed to know what did I enter?

3.

  • S: What kind of mobile phone do you have?
  • C: Black…

4.

  • C: I guess my phone is totally broken! It is unable to crawl onto the network for hours…
  • S: Well, I guess you mean connect…

5.

  • S: Your new password that you should change once you have logged in is: lowercase ‘a’- like apple, uppercase ‘V’ - like van, ‘7’…
  • C: Hold on! ‘7’ is lower or upper case?

Customer service commercial

When even customer service gives up

  • C: My phone is not working properly for a while now. It won’t ring when somebody tries to call me, no matter what I do. It’s a Samsung.
  • S: It is probably because you have accidentally silenced you phone. Do you see a speaker icon crossed out somewhere on your screen?
  • C: Yes, I do, but this is not my problem. As I have said…
  • S: Believe me, this is your problem. Try pressing the power button a bit longer until you are able to turn the silence mode off…
  • C: Nah, I have already done that, believe me, I know how to use MY phone. You sound like you didn’t understand my problem… Shall I explain it again?
  • S: Ohh, no need, now I do understand your problem. Please press the power button longer than before.
  • C: You mean now? While we are talking?
  • S: Yes, please follow my instructions. Just push and hold the power button for while.
  • C: Fine… I have started pr…

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© Copyright 2012-2014, Zsofia Koszegi-Nagy (zsobig)

© 2012 Sophie

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    • dhimanreena profile image

      Reena Dhiman 2 years ago

      Indeed a hilarious article. Thumbs up :)

    • JYOTI KOTHARI profile image

      Jyoti Kothari 3 years ago from Jaipur

      This is really funny. However, all of us face this type of situations or encounter with such answers. You made me lough and thank you.

      Rated up and funny!!

    • schur profile image

      Sarah 3 years ago

      Too funny!

    • zsobig profile image
      Author

      Sophie 3 years ago from United Kingdom

      JamaGenee - thank you for your comment! :)

      This is a very funny story that you have just shared - isure must have been much better when CS representatives actually had some rights to make their own decisions if the customer seemed to completely get out of hand... now instead the customer is always right, no matter what.

      Anyway, thank you for sharing and commenting! Wish you a happy day and a more peaceful work! :)

    • JamaGenee profile image

      Joanna McKenna 3 years ago from Central Oklahoma

      After being a cell phone customer service rep for two years (but thankfully before texting and SmartPhones came along), it was my opinion that some people were just too stupid to own any hand held electronic device. (-: One of my all-time favorite calls was a girl who said she wasn't getting any calls on her cell phone, which I determined was because she hadn't turned it off for several weeks and it simply needed a reboot. She said (and I quote) "but if I turn it off, I might miss an important call!". Hello. You're not getting ANY calls now, important or otherwise, right?

      This was also at a time when we were allowed, with one click, to end a customer's service right then and there. Don't think CS reps can do that now, but what a feeling of power to be able to do so when a customer declared that "no way am I EVER going to pay this bill!". Okay, sir. Click. tee hee

      Voted up and shared!

    • zsobig profile image
      Author

      Sophie 3 years ago from United Kingdom

      Thanks a lot dahoglund, I apprectiate your share and your comment very much! :)

      For a while, I have also worked as a remote desktop customer supporter, and some funny conversations happened there as well . The best is when even the customer has no idea what their problem is, but they are already looking for a solution - and misunderstandings can led to funny conversations :).

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 3 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      We went through a period at work where"public service was everyone's job." This was a problem for me because I was the only writer in the group and didn't know the details of the other workers jobs. Therefore I got calls from people who wanted to know when to expect a shipment or from truck drivers wanting directions, etc. I shard you hub with my followers and voted up and funny.

    • Madhavigk profile image

      Madhavi 4 years ago from Bangalore

      LOL! Superb collection!

    • amandajoyshapiro profile image

      amandajoyshapiro 4 years ago

      You opened and closed the article with two very funny jokes! I also like the one about smart telephone's 2nd joke about seeing the password you enter.

    • bn9900 profile image

      Clayton Hartford 4 years ago from Alger WA

      I am a Customer service agent for a cell phone company, and all these stories are so true, and we get these daily. Thank you for the laughs.

    • cat on a soapbox profile image

      Catherine Tally 5 years ago from Los Angeles

      Very funny! I'm technically challenged, but these examples really give me hope- lol.

      Thanks for an enjoyable read. :)

    • MarleneB profile image

      Marlene Bertrand 5 years ago from Northern California, USA

      Hilarious! I never thought about customer service from this angle. These are all so funny.

    • profile image

      mjkearn 5 years ago

      Hi Z

      Great hub and even bigger laugh. Very funny.

      Voted up and the rest,

      MJ.

    • Rosyel Sawali profile image

      Rosyel Sawali 5 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      LOL! I'm laughing out loud from reading this! I can empathize with the CS people. You should try technical support. It's a wacky job ^_^

    • Mama Kim 8 profile image

      Sasha Kim 5 years ago

      Thank you for this!! Hilarious ^_^ Voted, pinned and shared!!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 5 years ago from New York

      Great hub that truly shows the irony of where people's heads are! Sometimes the simplest things throw them for a loop. I totally relate having worked in technology for years.

      Voted up and funny.

    • zsobig profile image
      Author

      Sophie 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Thanks a lot guys, I'm very happy I was able to make you laugh with these quotes! :)

    • deepak2u profile image

      Govind Deepak Kumar 5 years ago from Andhra Pradesh,INDIA

      Excellent Articles ..i laughed a lot reading this jokes

    • profile image

      KDuBarry03 5 years ago

      LOL all true! This is my favorite: when I work, I ask a customer, "Hello; how are you?" their response: a ten minute description of their life story. Thanks fo ra great laugh :) Sharing this!

    • zsobig profile image
      Author

      Sophie 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Lipnancy: usually the same thing goes through my mind when I hear a similar story like these :). I usually have a huge patience, but well... let's just say I can understand the person in the last quote :).

      Anyway, thank you all for your comments and feedbacks, I appreciate it very much!

    • Lipnancy profile image

      Nancy Yager 5 years ago from Hamburg, New York

      God bless those people who deal with customers all day over the phone. They have a true patience that I do not have.

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

      Oh my gosh...thank you for sharing...this gave me a wonderful laugh! Voted up /funny

    • createmyeconomy profile image

      createmyeconomy 5 years ago from USA, Australia

      Awesome hub. Very funny!

    • zsobig profile image
      Author

      Sophie 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Thank you very much ladies, I'm glad you have enjoyed it too! :)

      I appreciate your feedback a lot!

    • Janine Huldie profile image

      Janine Huldie 5 years ago from New York, New York

      Loved all three of these, especially the last where the customer service rep got the person to hang up on them. Very cute and enjoyed greatly. Have voted and shared too!

    • profile image

      ignugent17 5 years ago

      You really made me laugh. I will give you five stars and that is not my password or pin. Thanks I really enjoyed reading it. I know you put a warning.

      Voted up , more and shared. :-)))