ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Business and Employment»
  • Employment & Jobs

How To Write A Resume or CV That Will Stand Out, FREE

Updated on January 5, 2016
The Interview
The Interview

How To Write A Good Resume or CV That Will Get Noticed.

I am a person with very small genitals and cannot keep a pet alive for more than two days without it losing an eye or a leg. I don't do drugs or drink alcohol, but I am willing to try them if it gets me a job.

NOW.... Do I have your attention.

The first few sentences in any resume, CV, or cover letter are the most important. Be bold and be brave. For every job you apply for, there are approximately another 300 people vying for the same position

You need to stand out and be different from anyone else if you are in for a chance. The possibilities that there are many more qualified or experienced people than yourself applying for that job, is high. his applies even if you think that you are fantastic.

Forget The Norm

Normal resumes or CVs' are box standard and pretty much all the same. No employer really wants a sheep, they are looking for leaders.

Employers require a person with a bit of ambition and drive, able to think on their feet, a brain cell that works and does not just copy everyone else.

Sample text from a resume that got the person a job. ( Liverpool, 2007 )

"I have no experience within the retail sector, but I can milk a cow and flog a dead pig to a Jew."

This worked. The prospective employer read this, took it home to his wife to show her, and promptly decided between them that they had to meet the person who wrote it. After the initial interview, the job was awarded to the writer, the only person who dared to be different.

Be a Cow, Not A Sheep !
Be a Cow, Not A Sheep !


The employer knew that this person was different. He also knew that the writer was an early bird and would work till late.

He knew this because cows need milking twice a day, early in the morning and later in the evening.

And as the position was in sales, any person whom boasts that the can sell pork to the Jewish must be a good salesperson.

Create Individual Resumes

Don't just have one CV or resume, have several. Have one which indicates that you are more towards sales, one for different types of construction, and others for the types of jobs you will be applying for.

Whether it's nursing, clerical work, bondage masseuse, or even simply testing the latest games, create a resume which is more towards this type of work and not just a general CV / resume for everything.

By doing this you are opening up more doors.

Shout About Yourself. Be Proud.
Shout About Yourself. Be Proud.


If you are still reading this far down the page using this unusual technique, then so will prospective employers.

But only because you have kept them interested.

Possible employers have to read through hundreds of resumes or CVs', and they get bored very quickly. Show them something different, and you will have their interest.

Even if you have little to say about yourself, whatever you do say needs to be made interesting to someone else.

If At First You Don't Succeed, Cheat !!

Not lie, but be imaginative with writing your resume or CV. Emphasize your skills in a way where it seems that you have flown to the moon and back with your particular profession.

If you are applying for a laboring job, tell them you work from dusk till dawn without dropping your work speed. If for a cleaning job, say that you love cleaning so much that you dream about Mr Sheen from the polish advert.

Whatever you can do, make it sound like you can do it with your eyes closed, one hand tied behind your back and the Queen of England sitting on your shoulders.

Get help with writing your resume from a friend, don't be embarrassed, be more embarrassed by not being able to afford food if you do not have a job.

NEED MORE HELP ! At the top of the page on the right, the adverts should have free resume/ CV packages which will guide you through the necessary steps in producing a correctly laid out CV or resume.

But who is to say which is the correct method for laying out or wring a resume ? Every person is different and unique, which could make you most suitable for the job which will be displayed tomorrow. Who knows?


Attaching a photograph to the resume' may help a person get their foot in the door.

If you are either a little bit weird looking or really ugly, then this may not be the way forward for you.

But if you are pleasing to the human eye, then it can do no harm.

Try to not to flirt to much in the photograph, your trying to get employment, not pregnant.

CSCS Card - UK

For UK readers whom require CSCS card for construction site employment.

FREE mock questions from the CSCS test

Free condensed revision notes for the CSCS exam


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • B. Leekley profile image

      Brian Leekley 4 years ago from Kalamazoo, Michigan, USA

      Up, Useful, and Interesting. I have not gotten a job using ordinary resumes, so I'll try your technique.