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How to Act Like a Customer Service Professional

Updated on August 4, 2015
social thoughts profile image

I have a B.A. in English with a minor in Gender and Sexuality Studies. I've been a Goth since age fourteen, and a Pagan since age fifteen.

Are you having a difficult day? Do you feel there is simply no way to please the public? Boy, do I have a solution for you! This step by step guide will teach you how to kiss ass and forget your own needs as a person because, let's face it, you aren't a person! You're a customer service representative, and you chose this path!

Let's get started!

Image courtesy of stockimages at
Image courtesy of stockimages at | Source


The most important part of greeting a self-absorbed customer who thinks the world revolves around them is to smile at them like they are the most fascinating humans to grace the planet or your place of work because, well, they are! If you don't smile, they will probably become frustrated over why you aren't so thrilled to be in their almighty presence! This will also convince them you love your job because you have the honor of sucking up to people with no common courtesy such as themselves!

Are you a customer service representative?

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Queen Elizabeth
Queen Elizabeth | Source

"Sir" and "Ma'am!"

When customers scream at us, it is our job to acknowledge our lack of need for respect. We give them all the respect they deserve for taking the time to tell us how they really feel; especially, about us in particular. One way to assure they know how special they are is to finish our sentences with "sir" and "ma'am." This tells the customer how important they are. We don't call just anyone "sir" or "ma'am" unless that customer has so much life experience that they no longer have to consider others or even the customer service representative they are currently screaming at because they make millions of dollars a day. Terms such as "sir" and "ma'am" are the acceptable versions of "your highness" for today's rulers and we know the more money they make the more countries they own.

Image courtesy of stockimages at
Image courtesy of stockimages at | Source

It's Your Fault; so, Apologize!

Remember, no matter how the issue happened, you are to blame. You may mistakenly think another co-worker, a boss or maybe even the company where the merchandise came from may be the cause for this complaining customer, but you aren't educated enough for it to be someone else's mistake. You're just a silly servant to this royal customer. So, take full responsibility for your lack of a worthy existence and apologize for the pain you, personally, caused this incredible person.

Keys To Success:

  • Smile
  • Use "sir" and "ma'am"
  • Apologize

So, what have we learned?

As customer service representatives, we do not deserve respect or to be seen as fellow people. We are to see ourselves as a waste of a life that can only be improved by helping those with more money. We may think we have degrees, goals, families and friends, but in reality our lives are about making the unhappy wealthy people into happy satisfied customers. I hope this article helps anyone in need of better customer service skills to turn sucking up to customers into a life-long career!

In all honestly, working as customer service is a very difficult job. For some reason, the public tends to view us as punching bags for their own problems. Consumers forget other humans are the ones serving them. In my experience, the more I perform the better the result. A particularly self-centered customer will usually not pick up on sarcasm or acting. So, when they are going on about how important they think they are I choose to agree with them because, as a co-worker once told me, we're sort of a form of entertainment as well. It's exhausting, but having a strategy in mind to deal with whatever craziness comes your way makes the day a little easier to get through.

© 2014 social thoughts


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