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My Wife is Seeing Someone Else...and His Name is Yardsellr!
The Slippery Slope
It was inevitable.
I've lived long enough to know that it's a cardinal sin for a man to neglect his wife.
I never meant for it to happen. Honest! It all began with my earnest and diligent efforts to make a positive difference by expanding my eBay business and forging multiple income streams through venues such as HubPages. My sincere motivation was to improve our lot in life as well as to invest in what could hopefully mature into future residual income.
That's what a man does for his wife and family, right?
The harder I worked, the more brownie points I thought I was getting from my wife.
But in hindsight, it's a real kick in the pants to wake up one morning and realize that moderation in any endeavor is crucial to a strong and healthy relationship.
Truth be told, eBay and HubPages were my alluring sirens, and I fell prey to their charms. It was I who succumbed to the temptation of being more attentive to these seductive entities than to my wife.
I blame myself for what happened...
The Other Man
If I were half my age, there'd be no doubt about it. I'd go over and sock him in his eye.
But time and age do have a mellowing effect on a man. So I'm opting to approach a healthy resolution to this dilemma in a matured and civilized manner.
And then, if that doesn't work, I'll punch him in the eye.
I get so busy with my work--answering customers' questions; listing items; monitoring new activity; printing shipping labels; packaging goods; writing follow-up emails.
And then there's my writing pursuits on HubPages. I'm really beginning to flow with the creative juices and starting to adapt comfortably into this amazing writer's lifestyle of constantly nagging ideas flowing through my brain, the stress of deadlines to meet, and the endless sparring with writer's blocks and distractions. And why in the world would I put myself through all of that?
Because, at the end of the day, there's this overwhelming sense of accomplishment and self-worth and the cushiony, comfy awareness that my words have formed suspension bridges connecting me with others.
Does ego play into this? Of course! But in a good way. No writer worth his salt is purely motivated by altruism. Borne on the wings of a basic human need to belong, writing for me is like my toddler activity of tossing pebbles into a Hawaiian pond so that I could watch the ever-expanding circular ripples kiss the bank on the opposite side.
Seven months ago, I wrote my first article for HubPages because I was curious to see if I could cut the mustard.
Today, I'm simultaneously writing five articles as I face a deadline whose bell will toll in precisely 21 hours. Shoot! I have less time than Keifer Sutherland's former TV alter ego to get this job done.
It was in the midst of this bittersweet insanity--overflowing with good intentions--that my wife of thirty years, my best friend for five years longer, my parental partner for 26 years, and my empty nest syndrome co-tenant for the last six weeks did the unthinkable.
She stepped out on me.
Great Thrift Treasures Mrs. Hawaiian Odysseus Has Found
- Starbucks City Mugs Are Hot!
Starbucks Coffee mugs are extremely popular collectible items. The author uses a real-life, real-time example to demonstrate how well some of these mugs sell on eBay.
- The Pink Panther Soars on eBay!
How cool is the Pink Panther? The more appropriate question for Hawaiian Odysseus and his wife on a particular autumn Sunday was: How HOT is the Pink Panther?
- The ANZAC Connection on eBay
An aesthetically pleasing find at a community thrift store in the Pacific Northwest turns a small yet eventful profit for a husband and wife eBay team. The timing of the sale and the theme of universal connectivity are added bonuses.
Honey, We Gotta Talk!
"Not now, sweetie. I'm trying to list this Baum Brothers ceramic vase."
"Hmm... you really like this Yardsellr, don't you?"
"Oh, yeah! I love it!"
"What does Yardsellr give you that I can't, honey?"
"Silly! Don't interrupt me...I have to concentrate on my listing."
"I'll let you list on eBay, honey. You'll do better there!"
"Are you kidding me? I wouldn't trade Yardsellr for the world!"
"Yeah. Yardsellr's cool and everything, but no competition for eBay."
"Hmmph...and while you're up to your neck in eBay and PayPal fees, I made my very first sale on Yardsellr today, and the only thing I have to pay for is shipping...and that's already absorbed into the price of the item. My profit will be greater than what it would have been on your precious eBay!"
"Honey, I'm very happy that you made your first sale today! That's fantastic! Anything I can do to help?"
"Thank you! Yes, you can help me with the packaging and the shipping label, just like I've helped you all these months with the picture taking and the completed sales research for items similar to what you're selling."
"Okay...and after you finish with what you're doing, can we have some dinner?"
"Go ahead and put something together. I've got several listings to post."
"Oh, okay...would you like to watch Criminal Minds with me later?"
"Um, sorry...I wanted to study up on the Yardsellr FAQ's. Maybe tomorrow?"
"Sure, maybe tomorrow."
"While I'm up here with Yardsellr, could you please do the dishes?"
"Sure thing, honey...love you!"
"Love you, too."
Yep. Nothing like good old communication to get the job done.
A man's gotta know how to secure his marriage. In this day and age, you just never know when some young Ricky Suave type is on the prowl for his next cougar conquest!
Like that punk, Yardsellr...who does he think he is, anyway? Guess I showed him!
Epilogue and Update
Yardsellr came up missing one day.
Yours truly was called in by the local authorities, in conjunction with law enforcement agents from California, and heavily barraged with questions. It seems, apparently, that I was on a short list of individuals with possible motives for facilitating the demise of Yardsellr.
Fortunately, Yardsellr showed up one day to pack up its unused advertising gimmicks--T-shirts, mugs, balloons, stationery...the whole nine yards.
Mrs. Hawaiian Odysseus has come to her senses and has even jumped on the eBay bandwagon. She opened up her own account and is doing quite well, thank you.
In fact, the only thing I'm concerned about these days is how she's showing me up on my favorite online site.
Leaving me chewing the proverbial cud while pondering the wisdom of--
Be careful what you ask for!