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Schmoozing, from an amateur's point of view

Updated on November 8, 2014

Reality's impact can come at any rate. The truth comes in the form of reaction to that particular circumstance or event.

Schmooze, by my definition … actually, it is best that I don't define it in my own terms to not offend the conservative sensibilities of some. In general, it is a figurative term synonymous with the idea of networking.

When I first heard the term, my professor felt it incumbent upon himself to tell us what we will have to do to keep a job, or become more popular with others. I also felt it incumbent upon myself to speak on behalf of the other students that to try to please everyone is quite impossible, and offensive. He smiled gently at me, amused at what he felt was my naiveté and said, "... Jeanette, you will have to schmooze in order to get anywhere in life."

Maslow's Point of View

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs theorizes that our decisions are often based on fulfilling our needs. Therefore, the assertion we will have to make is that this very theory explains the existence of conflict, and the need for resolution. When another person's needs are not met, the impetus is to framework a more pleasing outcome (especially if it is your boss or superior). We can justify this objective with the realization that one will benefit from such action by the obtaining of financial reward, handshake, or promotion.

Networking System (Mughal, 2014)

After years of employment and social interaction, the realization of how true my former professor's words are to me, even to this day. We schmooze as mothers to get our children to like us enough to do "our bidding". We schmooze as teachers when we want our students to follow our guidelines to a more successful outcome. We schmooze with our bosses and coworkers to keep our jobs. The true objective with these scenarios are to benefit, in some way, from the outcomes of interaction and discussion.

"How far do you go?"

There are limits to how far you can go with your schmoozing, and there are some who give up their morals in order to have a more beneficial outcome. Others have a more conservative approach with their intentions, while some weigh the circumstances and fatefully accept the outcome. Think of the machinations of choice versus decisions, which can embody the cumulative effect or impact of those outcomes.

Needs and Choices theory (Mughal, 2014)

For those who believe, religion can play a significant role in our decisions. We use that theory in guiding us on the right road to take. If there is failure after choice, religion can help us justify the wrong by giving us hope with an abstract viewpoint and from a respected higher source. For those who don't believe in this higher source, nature takes precedent to explain the outcome. The concrete dilemma is to view the world in its societal intertwining of personalities. It is never a stable force, of that, where the results usually can implode with the joy of winners, while the losers move on their way.

What to do?

There is nothing wrong with failing. This is the time to schmooze to a better state of being. Acceptance of self and circumstances can help us alleviate the impact of a loss. We can use the time of transition to search within, and enable emotional growth. It is a time to strengthen the positive within, and modify the negative.

One important aspect when focusing on self is that you must accept that you cannot please everyone.

Test Your Schmooze Level (Mughal, 2014)

Do you schmooze?

See results


Mughal, Jeanette. (2014). Self-created charts and theories.

Van de Vall, Tim. (2013). Tim's Printables, Dutch Renaissance Press. Retrieved on November 7, 2014, from


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