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Step into my office, I mean Starbucks, no, I mean my office – Don’t Get Me Started!

Updated on April 11, 2010

I previously wrote about observing a life coach doing her magic coaching a victim, I mean client in a Starbucks ( but recently I’ve found that if I go into my Starbucks instead of it being some cool coffee house vibe it’s become like a world of semi-cubicle businesses sort of like a farmer’s market or something under one roof. There they all sit with their laptops up, WiFi connection in place life coaching one another, working on the legal papers to help a friend not have their house be foreclosed upon or having their taxes done. As I looked around at what is no doubt the future of American businesses who can’t afford the overhead of an office I couldn’t help but wonder if it makes you leery when your accountant tells you to choose a Starbucks to meet him at to discuss your finances or if it’s sort of like when you found the toy in the cereal before your sibling did because you get to have your coffee and meeting too? Step into my office, I mean Starbucks, no, I mean my office – Don’t Get Me Started!

I’m actually surprised that someone in the Starbucks corporate world hasn’t figured out a way to rent tables at their locations just for the purpose of business people who all ready use Starbucks as their office. You could rent it by the hour, throw in some WiFi and/or a cup of coffee and there you have it, another source of revenue for the company. At the end of the hour your WiFi would cut off and the music of Sade’s newest CD would get so loud from the built-in speakers in the table that you would no longer be able to converse with the person you’re doing business with until you paid for another hour. (Like they need my advice, right?) Lest you think that I’m scoffing at the idea of doing business in a Starbucks, my first interview for my current position (well, my only interview – yes, I’m that good) took place in a Starbucks. Obviously it went well.

I guess what gets me is that with all that Starbucks does to maintain their, “Look at us, we’re a cool coffee house no matter how much you feel like it’s a fast food joint” with their CD sales and good music playing, friendly staff and drinks with names that even I wonder where they came up with them, we all get that they are the leaders when it comes to the places they’ve created. But there’s a large part of me that really wants to walk in and find a group of guys huddled over a table in their berets with their sunglasses and goatee soul patches in place, their anemic pallor only slightly visible through the haze of the imported cigarette smoke they’re creating by holding their cigarettes between their index finger and thumb with their palms up to the air as they purse their lips to take a drag and then exhale slowly blowing their smoke into a haze like the one in their minds. Cool, man. Unfortunately most of the time when I go into Starbucks I only find harried mothers shoving pastries and yes, believe it or not, coffee drinks down their kids’ gullets as they race to take them to school. Or a gaggle of soccer moms having just dropped off their kids at soccer and are now getting some mommy, mommy and mommy time to drink coffee and talk about the mommy that isn’t in attendance (it never pays to be absence from a gathering of people who all know you).

I guess I would have a business meeting or interaction with someone in a Starbucks but it all depends on what business the guy is doing, right? I don’t think my proctologist should be doing business at Starbucks and the good news there is that I don’t think Starbucks thinks so either. Step into my office, I mean Starbucks, no, I mean my office – Don’t Get Me Started!

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    • somelikeitscott profile image

      somelikeitscott 7 years ago from Las Vegas

      Denise, they'll definitely need to make room for Suitcase Man!! I live in Vegas and I'm little surprised we haven't seen a Starbucks hotel and casino all ready...hmmmm...never know.

    • denise mohan profile image

      denise mohan 7 years ago from California

      Nice hub as always Scott. When I lived off the campus at SDSU our Starbucks was right on the campus. Aside from school work with laps galore we had SUITCASE MAN. A guy who would ride buses all over San Diego all day long and make his stop at Starbucks to sleep. Our's was Hotel Starbucks. Despite all the young people doing homework this guy would pull up with his rolling suitcase, order a coffee and then take a nap for an hour or two. I complained twice to a "Hotel Clerk" & manager and I was told "Well, he did buy a coffee." So when the rental spaces open up be sure to reserve a cot for suitcase man from San Diego. I told you he does get around.

    • George J Hardy profile image

      George J Hardy 7 years ago from Southern New Jersey

      Starbucks is simply "the new cool", at least your "cool"