ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Top Five Ways To Quit Your Job: Creative ways to hand your notice in

Updated on November 27, 2012

"That's it! I quit!"

Has you workplace ever left you wanting to just throw your paperwork in the air, send a right-hook flying towards your boss's chin and storm out in a whirlwind of rage?

If so, you're not alone - but before you act on impulse and quit your job like that, remember this: Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Below are 5 creative, fun and oh-so-satisfying ways of leaving your job. Each requires a little planning, and it's worth noting that if you ever intend on returning to the same place of work (or for that matter getting a good reference), then these methods are probably not the best way to go. You've been warned.

1. The Letter of Resignation

A letter is the standard way to quit your employment. Sure, you might drop hints or even tell your boss you're leaving - but until you hand that letter, it's never (usually) official.

Why not take advantage of this formality?

Rather than use it to spout some woolly fluff like "it is with deepest regret that I inform you of my intent to part from the employ of your company", use it instead to politely (yet firmly) list all of the completely honest reasons why you're leaving. I don't want to stifle your creativity by telling you what to say... but it could begin a little something like this:

"Dear (ex)boss (or this is also a good place to insert any nickname you've used for him/her behind his/her back)

It is with the deepest regret that I have come to realize I am still under your employment. I am therefore writing this letter of formality to inform you of my joy, pleasure and happiness at the prospect of leaving to seek more meaningful employment elsewhere.

Although this may come across as a personal attack, I'd like to reassure you that it isn't - I'm sure that in your personal life you're a lovely person who actually does know how to treat others with respect..."


Well, you get the point. Of course, you could always hire a professional writer to do the dirty work for you...

Flash Mob

2. The Flash Mob

Ever seen a flash mob in action?

A flash mob is a large group of people who all rehearse a sequence together and then at a certain signal perform it in public. I've embedded a Youtube video as an example on the right.

So, why not get all your other workmates (or even hire a professional flashmob) to suddenly start singing and dancing right in the middle of the office?

You can even customize the lyrics to sing to your boss exactly why you're throwing in the towel.

Then, part way through, let the flash mob part leaving a clear path for you to walk straight to the exit. You might want to flip your boss off on the way out.

3. The Men in White Coats

Ever heard the song by Dr Demento (they're coming to take me away ha-haa...)?

If not, you can listen to a re-done version of it using the Youtube link on the right. While you're enjoying a bloody good song, I'm going to tell you a bloody good way of quitting your job.

Get Sectioned


OK, so you don't have to actually get yourself institutionalised... but on the day you intend to quit, start acting a little odd.

Perhaps start by muttering to yourself at your desk, and increase the intensity as the day goes on. Bark at your boss. Start chewing paper. Then, at a planned moment, have 2 of your friends from out of your workplace come in wearing white coats, approach your manager to have a brief word, then come and fit you in a straight jacket and pull you off the premises. Works a treat every time!

4. The Competition

This method only works if there is more than one person looking to quit the job.

The idea is, you don't quit - instead you get fired. The aim of the game is to be the first person to get fired. You can play with any number of people from 2 upward, but it's usually best to set some rules. For example:

1. You can't do anything illegal (like killing your boss. You'd win too easily.)

2. You can't tell your superiors what you're trying to achieve

3. Everybody can throw in some cash and the first person to get fired takes the lot


The more people you have playing, the funnier (and more chaotic) this can become - be careful.

5. The Great Escape

This method works best if you're quitting because you've recently won the lottery or come into a large inheritance (the reason being is you may have to repair significant damage as well as paying for a helicopter).

Step One: Hire a helicopter and crew

Step Two: Arrive at work early, climb on top of the building and cut a large hole (using power tools) directly above where you sit

Step Three: Cover the hole with a board

Step Four: Go to work

Step Five: Halfway through the day, have your team bring the helicopter to your place of work. When you hear it approaching, play some music (optional), have somebody kick the board from the hole and then have the helicopter crew throw a rope through the hole which you will grab and fly up up and away to freedom.

Your Favourite Method

Which of the above methods would you prefer to use to stick it to your boss?

See results

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • writeyourwrongs profile imageAUTHOR

      John Crowley 

      6 years ago from Sheffield

      Thanks everybody. Chris, they probably put that alcoholics ad there because they saw my last 10 purchases on Amazon and thought my readers would all be the same - and yes, I have been stalking you. Sorry. Doodlehead, glad I could lift your spirits - thanks for following.

      Mejohnson... I guess you could always combine the two and get taken away by a psychiatric helicopter?

    • mejohnson profile image

      mejohnson 

      6 years ago

      This is great advice! Men in white coats is tempting, but I'd go with the exit via helicopter. Sounds fun.

      Great hub. Voted up.

    • Doodlehead profile image

      Doodlehead 

      6 years ago from Northern California

      So funny. Needed that today!

    • profile image

      chrisinhawaii 

      6 years ago

      I love it, John! Good fun.

      I also love that the first ad Google chose to place on this hub is "Alcoholic Rehab".

    • profile image

      chrisinhawaii 

      6 years ago

      That's how I quit my last 5 jobs! Have you been stalking me while I'm stalking you?

      Not fair...

    • MelChi profile image

      Melanie Chisnall 

      6 years ago from Cape Town, South Africa

      LOL!! Sometimes I really wish I could have written that dreaded resignation letter the way I wanted to write it, as you've given an example of above. That would have been a lot more fun than sitting and thinking up clever ways to word it.

      I'm sure we've all had thoughts like this and Jerry McQuire moments where we just wanted to tell our bosses to get lost. And then reality sets in because we don't want to burn our bridges....yes, the world really is that small - you just never know.

      A fun hub, I enjoyed it - thanks for sharing! Voted up and funny.

    • writeyourwrongs profile imageAUTHOR

      John Crowley 

      6 years ago from Sheffield

      Thanks for the comments - and yes, the ideas are silly but they aren't meant to be taken seriously so I'm glad you recognized that.

      All the best :-)

    • carrie Lee Night profile image

      Carrie Lee Night 

      6 years ago from Northeast United States

      Interesting article and well written but most options are not reality. I think a letter of resignation is the most realistic and sane way to quit. I would never do anything to get me fired or leave on a bad note no matter how bad the job was because when you are trying for another job and they find out about your antics, you may not get the job you really want. I would recommend this article for amusement only. Thank you for writing it, cause in this country free speech allows expressions of all kinds. :)

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)