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"Why I didn't" Make Coffee for the Boss

Updated on February 21, 2012

No Coffee?


It is real simple? I feel my boss does not deserve for me to make his pot of coffee every morning because of the way he treats me. He treats me poorly and unprofessionally. He just thinks of me as a person who was hired to cater to his every need. He does not act in a professional way towards his employees. He has no regards for a boss and employee relationship. He does not know how to professionally deal with his employees because of lack of communication, therefore situations like who should make the coffee in the morning arises and becomes a problem. If he only knew how to talk to people and communicate with me this could have been avoided altogether. Then you ask yourself, who would want to make coffee for a boss who is unappreciative, ungrateful, no empathy, no compassion, selfless, ruthless, malicious, a backstabber, and a liar. Definitely not me! I would not want to make my boss coffee or anything else for that matter. I would not pick up lunch for him, take his clothes to the cleaners, have his shoes shined, nor bring him food from the celebration of birthdays, anniversaries, or retirements. To me he does not deserve nice treatment until he realizes how to treat others. Why go out of my way to treat him as a king and I am treated as hired help.

It is very appalling when you treat a person with respect, kindness, professionalism and you are their right hand and all you receive is a swift kick in the butt as appreciation. Its enough not to work for someone let alone do things for them. It feels degrading when a person does the best they can and another person demands more and more of them. As if your efforts mean nothing. I believe I am being treated horribly. Ruthlessness beyond mentioning. Like you are some kind of servant to his every need. I have never been treated in all my years as an administrative assistant so in humane as if I had no feelings. Lying to me face to face and behind my back. My boss was pulling the knife in and out of my back knowingly without shame. What a good manipulater he is when he wants his way! Of course it is his way or no way! You have no say so whatsoever! Have you ever heard of the saying "its my way or the highway." This is a good gig for someone who is a great delegater. Have someone else do all the work, yet lay claim to it because you're in charge.

Then the boss just doesn't lie once or twice, but all the time. In fact, I caught him in one of his twisting lies just three months prior from the last time he was telling tales on me. Such a twisted mind! It's a shame that he is this way. Then you ask yourself, "why didn't I make coffee for the boss!" Let's analyze this for a minute. With all the things this man has done to me, it's a wonder I am still his assistant.

Did it ever occur to him why I don't make coffee for him or bring him lunch? I always informed him that his coffee was ready every morning as the paralegals in another department would call to let him know when the coffee finished brewing. He actually joined a coffee club in the paralegal unit of the office since he figured that I was not going to make him a pot of coffee in the mornings. So his friends from the paralegal unit had a coffee fund that people could join by paying $5.00 a month towards the contribution for coffee, cream, and sugar. So everybody in the paralegal unit would take turns making coffee every morning so that way the members of the coffee club could enjoy their cup of Joe each day. My boss eventually started making pots of coffee himself. That was the only right thing to do since he is a member of the coffee club! Let him pitch in and brew his own cup. There is no need for me to put on a pot of coffee in his office if he is getting coffee somewhere else! What, you got to have multiple coffee pots brewing throughout the office? I don't think so! Not unless there is an awful lot of people drinking coffee. That's enough wouldn't you say! On occasion, I would bring him lunch being courteous as I am. You give someone an inch, they take a yard!

I look at it this way, what nice thing has he said or done for me in appreciation of my support. Especially in backing him up when he is caught in the line of fire. Where does he give advice or show empathy towards me? My boss doesn't even acknowledge me half the time, let alone display his gratitude for having an assistant. He can bypass me in a room like I was air. What is that saying, "you don't know what you have until you lose it." In fact, he has never been thankful or grateful for the assistance and support I have given to him over the years! Besides, he is inconsiderate most of the time. With that being said, it is time to move on.

Looking at this situation from a different prospective, do you think I should make coffee for my boss? Because he pays my salary or rates my performance at the end of the year! How hard could it be to make someone coffee every morning? It shouldn't be that difficult, right! To be quite honest with you I do make coffee for my boss occasionally. I just don't pour the coffee inside his cup. I leave it to him to pour his own cup of Joe and to add his own cream and sugar. You can't spoon feed someone for heaven sake. Once you get into the habit of making coffee, pouring it into a cup or mug, adding cream and sugar and stirring it, what else is left? Taking a cup of Joe and placing it to the boss' mouth so he can sip his coffee! I thought I was his assistant not his wife or maid. Oops wait a minute, a maid doesn't even do that! Not even a personal chef.

There are some things I feel that are not for an assistant to do! As it is, at one point I was bringing him snacks, desserts and sometimes even breakfast; like danishes, muffins, croissants, pastries, and bagels. I always give him his newspapers to read, take messages and hold all calls for him when he does not want to be disturbed. Besides, I always have his back no matter what! All administrative work is completed in a timely fashion. Deadlines are met. Paperwork is submitted for approval on time. Reports are handed to him expeditiously. Office correspondence is fully detailed and explained to him thoroughly. I take good care of him. He has nothing to complain about! But you know how some people are! No matter what you do for them they are never satisfied. You can bend over backwards, do summersaults, cart wheels, shucks you can even be a contortionist it really doesn't matter. Just think for a minute! If I wait on my boss hand and foot that will be it. Next it will be can you take my clothes to the dry cleaners? Can you mail my personal letters for me? Or here's a better one, I need my shoes shined. Do you think you can have them shined for me? Maybe I should just pick up some groceries for you while I'm at it! If he had kids, I guess I should pick them up from school and baby sit them for the evening too! What's left like I said earlier? I am an administrative/executive assistant, not a personal assistant.

I truly believe if I had gone any further in making my boss his coffee and serving it to him, I would be doing extra duties not relevant to my employment. Now my job does consists of many things, but making coffee is not one of them. I was hired to be an executive assistant not a coffee barista. I asked the boss, do you need an assistant or personal service? He couldn't even answer me. He changed the subject so quick by going off topic that he started talking about something else that was entirely off the beaten path. Probably because he knows I am telling the truth and he doesn't want to hear it. Catering to someone's every need, it could well be maid service I'm sure! Pamper me, pamper me, pamper me! Every morning, I go to work to do the duties I was hired to do! Don't get me wrong, I don't mind doing extra things for the boss, but with in reason. Let's see here if we were to switch the order of events, I could not expect for the boss to do my errands; cooking, cleaning, or catering to my every need, now could I? I know what you are about to say. But he's the boss and your not! So the roles here don't apply. Unless I was his boss right! We should not think like that! Just because someone is the boss, doesn't mean they can go around treating people in any kind of way, just because they feel like it.

What year is this, 2012? You see if he could only see what I have done for him. But this is not possible for he only sees what he wants to see. He turns a blind eye when it comes to himself. When it comes to me it's a whole different story. It seems though no matter what I do and how well I do my job, it's never going to be enough. I can't do enough for him as his executive assistant. It is sad but reality! Life goes on and so do I. So with this being said, the time has come for me to say goodbye. It was fun the first couple of years as his assistant, but change is even sweeter. May your next assistant make you coffee without hesitation.



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    • profile image

      Rubelito 5 years ago

      That's happened to me also, she's my boss on my OJT, my experience is really horrible, I think that's the reason why I have anxiety in applying any jobs, because I'm afraid that maybe my new boss is like her also. And she always shout at me.

      sorry for my english

    • chileandivan profile image

      chileandivan 6 years ago

      Thanks, and I am so glad you left. I posted a similar story, you can check it out if you have time.

      Best, and good luck in any new job you have for the future.

    • Marla Rose profile image

      Marla Rose 6 years ago from Aventura, Florida

      First of all I want to thank you for commenting on this topic I wrote. You have no idea what I went through, but you are absolutely right about getting away from him. I put up with his nonsense for about 4 and half years too long. I actually did get away from him and I moved on to another department in the company. Thank heaven for that! Talk about stress and misery! Oh my lord! Too much stress and worry for anyone is not good. I learned something recently from my pastor that if you are not happy at what you are doing, you must get out of it. Going to work everyday stressed out and filled with tension and anxiety is not healthy. Everyone should love what they do or at least like what they do. Not because you have to pay bills or you are obligated to stay or for some other crazy reason like that. All you are doing to yourself is destroying your self worth, self esteem, self confidence and life in general. I feel that my health is worth more than any job out there. Because without your health, you wouldn't exist.

      The sad thing about this whole situation is I am now in another department with a set of new bosses that are no better than the one I had previous for five and a half years. Insanity wouldn't you say! Guess it's time to leave the company altogether.

      I liked your response very much. It really hits home for me. You hit it right on the nose! I appreciate your advice as well. Take care and may good fortune fall upon me!

    • chileandivan profile image

      chileandivan 6 years ago

      I am sorry this happened to you as it is now also happening to me. My boss is the same bully and coward you are working for. My boss tried to fire me, but he has no authority and it only came off as lies during my performance review. He ended my review by saying everyone in the office hated me and no one wanted to work with me anyway, so I should not be there. But he has no authority to fire me, or he would have by now. He is currently being investigated by the company, they will find his hidden skeletons for sure. I hope you are able to get another job. It may not pay as well as the one you have, but if you can leave it will be good for your sanity and self worth. It is stressful working with someone who does not appreciate you, I should know. Consider looking for a new job now at least, you will feel better just looking and you may actually find another position with nicer people. Don't fall into the trap of staying because you are comfortable. I worked at my job over 5 years and the lies just made me sick to my stomach after awhile. Who needs this stress? Find a headhunter or go to Craigslist for your city, but get out if you can or switch to a different department. Your bad boss is only looking out for himself and is probably treated the same way at home (which has nothing to do with you). Don't let him make you the scapegoat for everything wrong at the office. I never had anyone say happy birthday or ever got a nod on admin/secretary appreciation day. Seriously, get out if you can, don't stay but good luck in whatever you decide.


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