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A Tale of a Christian Real Estate Brokers Experience With Fellow Believers
Sunset and View of the Olympics
Discouragement, You'll Have No Victory!
A Tale of a Christian Real Estate Brokers Experience w/Fellow Believers.
It can be difficult to forgive....
Un-forgiveness. I can identify. I do come around and forgive however, but it is a process in contrast to being instantaneous. In the business I'm in, I've encountered 4 different sets of believers who did me wrong over the last handful of years. The enemy would've loved to see me angry at God and out of fellowship with His people. It hasn't worked! The first occurrence was back in 2006. I was naive about these "seller" clients and it turned out to be a revelation of their true colors (not everyone who professes lives it). It was still disappointing. I've grown though since then and I know I won't always be the right "fit" for everyone (and vice versa) and if people don't appreciate me, if they won't listen to my counsel, I don't want to waste my time.
Two of the most recent losses with buyers occurred within just months of each other and they were the most devastating. It took several months before I completely got over it. People don't always seem to realize how much is invested and that I don't get a paycheck if I don't close a sale. I invest time and money to make money and when it's all for naught (which is the way it goes at times; I realize and accept this truth), when this happens due to a lack of honor from the other party, it can be SUPER discouraging. I'm not the only one affected; there is a ripple affect. Consider for instance my entire family, including God and the furthering of His kingdom since I'm faithful to tithe from my income! Both parties ended up buying through someone else and I've never asked brothers and sisters in the Lord to sign a "Buyers Agency Agreement" (documentation of a Buyers commitment of loyalty to me) because I expect more from them. I probably should since it's just good business. Anyway, of the two most recent, one party felt very badly about it and profusely apologized, gave me an explanation. I suspect the husband and wife may have been divided about working with me. I'm confident from the communications she and I had, to include her apology and explanation, that she was sold on me. He evidently wasn't or else he may have issues w/ faithfulness. He was here in the state and she was not and someone from his work recommended another Realtor. Mr. Buyer did not say he was already working with me. Anyway, they both understood I was wronged since he was there when she apologized, gave the explanation, and he said without an ounce of sarcasm, to 'blame it all on him.'
The other person, a young single man, I don't think had a clue. I wrote 3 offers for him (and had one home under contract which he walked away from. I didn't hold this against him. I want my clients to do what is best for them and understood his reasons for not wanting to move forward). Although he did not have the courage to share why, I think he decided to stop working with me because of feeling angry over a decision I made regarding changing where my family was going to be attending church. Perhaps he justified if I wasn't going to be faithful to that body of believers, he was not going to be faithful to me.
The 4th was within the last year....mature, professional believers (he is a dentist) who were considering my services in listing their home for sale. We had several communications and I provided them data on many occasions. When the time came, they listed w/ someone else and prior to that, they stopped returning my calls and replying to emails. I at least would have liked to know why they went somewhere else and think it takes courage, courtesy and class ("The Three C's") to be able to bring finality to any professional relationship.
Although I haven't forgotten, I can say I have finally forgiven these people. There have been lessons for me to learn through these incidents too and I don't harbor any grudges. Thankfully, God has continued to provide me with business. I know too He is my Advocate and also my Vindicator so if these people are to come under any judgment, that's His role. I have surrendered them. I also know He is Merciful and Just and has already paid the price for our transgressions.... I'm certain when before the throne, the one couple who demonstrated "The Three C's," will not come under any judgment. It's been forgotten as far as the east is from the west.
There is the possibility some of the others have already gone to the Lord for forgiveness. I have to consider too, there is the possibility He may have told them to go with someone else. His ways are higher than ours. I'm more prone however to believe that it was the enemy since the enemy knows that my desire is to do well in this business so that we can experience more financial freedom and I can devote more time to ministry. I'm sure Satan heard me say this back in 2005 when I became licensed in this state. Now my thinking has shifted....I want to focus more on ministry and God will provide the means for my being able to do so, and if at some point this looks like me working doing something else or working somewhere else, I'm sure He will make that clear. Every now and then, I check out Craigslist to see if there is anything which catches my interest enough to apply for.. not limited to, but working in administrative assistant type roles mainly (if I could do that and still utilize my license, it could be ideal!). Working set hours and earning decent pay at times sounds really appealing. I enjoy being a Realtor though - working with people, "going" and showing or seeing homes, creating marketing pieces, doing research, continuing my education and overcoming challenges. The ability to experience flexibility in my schedule is wonderful. And of course, when transactions close, it's typically good money.
Going back to the subject of forgiveness; it's one thing to realize a wrong was committed and seek the Lord for forgiveness. Finality and everlasting peace truly comes when an offender also goes to the person they wronged, seeking their forgiveness too. It goes back to the "Three C's" the Lord just gave me today in sharing this (it also requires humility). There is power in that....."kicking the devil's ass" kind of power. I like that and thank you Jesus! It's possible because of who you are in us and who we are in you. However, we can not control others attitudes and actions so again it goes back to surrendering them - trusting and resting in the truth that in the end, it's between them and the Lord.