Expectations-What I expected when I started on HubPages vs What I found when I got here
Change that I needed to make to be more like me
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Were you the Sun today? Did you put to sleep the darkness? Did you scare away the Boogie Man? And Monsters that hide under the bed, And shine for all to see? Were you the light that filled...
What was expected vs What was gained
I have read some great hubs written by some great writers that explain why they love Hub Pages and/or why they write here. When I started writing here, I had hopes to what I would accomplish, just as many of the Huber’s have when they begin, unsure if any one else is going to care about what they have to write. Some here are here as a hobby and have no intention of becoming a professional writer, others are here for friendships and chat well into the evening hours after they lay their children down to sleep. I came here to collect who I was and who I am, after long ago I lost myself.
In the beginning I wasn’t sure if I was a good writer and not sure if anyone would want to read what I had to write. But I started here as a way to figure out who I am without feeling ashamed or judged for thinking, feeling and saying the wrong things. I figured if I was horrible and wrote hubs that no one liked, I could bow out and with no harm done-opposed to life, where I felt like I wasn't doing a single thing right and felt as if I was lost and my thoughts and feelings were unique to me and no one really knew or wanted to know to understand me.
After awhile, I had a few followers that left positive, encouraging comments on my hubs (Mike Lickteig, Ben Zoltak, Samboiam, Veronica Allen, Ann Nonymous, Sage Williams, Nadiaazhar, Hypnodude, Nan Mynatt) and was welcomed into the forums and motivated by a few uplifting guides (crazdwriter, Cagsil, Ken Abell, Richieb799, Misha, Justine76 and Lyrics)-which helped me stay positive and continue to write and publish more hubs. I never intended to make money here, so I wasn’t affected when I didn’t make any the first few months. I more so wanted to see an increase in views which for the longest time was less than 100 views per day (at times, less than 50), and I hoped that I could get back into the habit of writing again after I had laid my pen and paper down many years ago and lost myself in life and self torment.
As time goes by- I am still here.
So it has been six months and I am still here on Hub Pages. Other than Hub Pages I now write 3 columns for the Examiner, as well as create content for one of the largest Website Design and Development Companies in San Antonio. I manage the online influence of that company as well as many of their customers by leading the Online Marketing Strategy and Search Engine Optimization sectors of the company.
I am working on illustrations for a poem which I originally posted here on Hub Pages, which once illustrations are complete, the poem and drawings will be transformed into a Children's book and published. Finally I am also honored to be making slide shows/ videos to go along with music written by Huber, Mr. Daniel Carter. What I expected when I signed onto Hub Pages is nothing compared to what I have gained from the experience, whether directly or indirectly.
I see myself with more clarity today than I did 6 months ago, and for a girl who has been lost for a very long time, it feels good to be able to not only breathe, but believe in myself, for perhaps the first time in my life. I am able to organize my thoughts into hubs and even ramble on about nonsense, I am a better, less stressed mother for my children and person for my husband because I began to write on Hub Pages and stopped holding in everything that I felt and was scared to be judged by.
So when someone asks me, what is so important about Hub Pages, if you don’t make money off of it? I just smile and shake my head as I respond politely,
“You say, it is a silly writer’s community, or a place to gossip and chat just like Face book or My space. What that tells me is; you don’t understand the power of the written word and what it means to the many people that coexist side by side in this world. What it tells me is that you don’t know what it is to feel alone even when you are surrounded by people. To feel as if no one knows you, understands you or believes in the same things that you believe in- because you are not even sure that you know yourself anymore. It tells me that you have never written something that you wanted to share with others just so you know what they think about words that mean the world to you.
Although most writers on Hub Pages will never meet one another face to face-I am sure that most have made some friends that believe in them, and are shown support from these friends when having a trying day. I am sure that many have met a few that have experienced the same pain and have been through similar life experiences, and they feel as if they can truthfully share who they are without shame. Many of us here on Hub Pages have read and followed another Huber because we are inspired by who they are and are motivated by what they say. Even though many will never profit from their writing in a way that will support their families and bring riches to their lives, they undeniably do profit from this writers community in other ways. I write here on Hub Pages, because what I have earned here is so much more than what a million dollars is worth to me”.
I do not live in with the disillusioned fantasy that I am the best writers here, nor do I believe that I will be a millionaire soon because of my writing abilities. I hope that I am of some support to a few Huber’s that don’t see how beautiful and talented they truly are, I hope that some of what I write is relatable to people and what they are feeling in their life. I hope that some of what I have decided to share here is motivation for at least one person to remember to breathe today. I hope I can give someone a light at the end of a tunnel that reassures them that things can and will get better. I hope that just one person that reads something that I write, thinks about it once or twice after they have clicked of the hub and my words make them want to see the world in a different light for just a day. I hope that I write something that makes someone want to be kinder than they were yesterday, and makes them want to lift up someone who has fallen rather than step on or over them.
I don’t write here to make a million dollars or to have a million readers- I am just writing here because when I started to write again, I became a better person for the two people that matter the most to me in this world, and they are worth far more than a million to me. .