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The View Inside My Head During a 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge

Point of View--The Spectator (Reader)
When you present your tickets to the usher and step into the convention center, there is a sense that you're leaving the real world behind and entering a fantastic domain of make-believe.
You are either escorted to your designated seats or free to choose your own from among those that have not yet been claimed. You and your date excuse yourselves as you carefully maneuver your way among knees and feet to what you perceive to be the best seats in the house.
Settling into the plush, cushy seats, there is an ambiance akin to what you feel just before a Boeing 747 sprints down the runway. There's a sense of accomplishment. You made the plans to be right here, right now, at this very moment. You're with your significant other, and there's nary a care in the world that has followed you through the door with the neon exit sign. You're ready for the magic to begin.
You recall that you need to turn your cellphone off, and you remind your partner to do the same. You do a last minute shuffle of the Rolodex in your mind--the notes you wrote for the babysitter and placed them where she could easily find them, including your phone number; setting the phone on vibrate; remembering where you parked the car; out of habit, nervously feeling for the wallet in your front right trousers pocket and the cellphone in your left front trousers pocket; reviewing the program one more time, memorizing the key actors' and actresses' names as well as the characters they play. Ah, just in time...
The lights are dimming, and there's a kind of rush deep down in your belly as you anticipate following the rabbit down the magic hole.
Ain't life grand?

Point of View--The Performer (Writer)
I'm beset with marauding insecurities.
What if I can't remember my lines?
Am I credible?
Can I absolutely LOSE myself in the role of the character?
What if the audience absolutely hates me?
What if I suck?
Will I come across dry and stilted?
Will my timing be impeccable?
What if someone in the audience distracts me?
What if they start booing?
What if someone else makes a mistake and I lose character?
What if I lose my voice?
In case of an emergency, do I have what it takes to ad lib?
Oh, man, I'm sweating profusely! What if they see the sweat stains?
What if my makeup starts running? Will I look like a clown?
What if they laugh when they're supposed to cry?
What if they cry when they're supposed to laugh?
What if somebody throws something at me?
Will I be able to effectively convey the message of the playwright?
What IS that message? I can't even remember! I'm SO nervous!
Oh, shoot! 1 minute to go! What's my cue? When and where do I come in? What if I can't hear the other actors? How will I know when it's time to get on stage? Where's that stage director when you need her? My opening line...WHAT'S MY OPENING LINE?
Oh, my God! Why am I naked? What happened to my clothes?
The 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge
Have you ever participated in the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge?

Personal Impressions
Okay, so you get the point.
What you, the reader, are presented with is a finished hub with all of the necessary accessories. At the very least, you will hopefully find it interesting reading. At best, it will provide you with a compelling and refreshing respite from the demands of life.
My job as a writer is to facilitate your excursion from the real world into a literary dimension. Professional presentation requires me to do this in such a manner that you never see me sweat.
Which is precisely why I respond, at least in preserving the core integrity of this hub, with: "Hell, no! I'm speaking the truth! Engaging in this 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge is terribly difficult! Anyone who tells you differently is lying through his or her (false) teeth!"
It's Day 9 of the challenge, and I'm still hard at work on my fifth hub. That already means, less than a week and a half into this challenge, I've already put myself behind the 8-ball. At some point in time, I am going to have to write at least two hubs a day on at least four different days.
The pressure never lets up. No wonder I'm experiencing the same dreaded anxiety I faced as a thespian in high school and college.
The real source of my stress? It's me! Me and my high expectations. Me and this asinine pursuit of perfection. Me and my paradoxical fear of success!
I joined HubPages sixteen months ago to become a successful writer. My awareness of that dream is that I am more convinced than ever--after 112 featured hubs--that my fear of success is still a very real and present entity.
Why? Because every time I write, I feed that ravenous wolf at my door.
Here are the thoughts I would never in my right mind dare to reveal to anyone else. So why am I sharing these thoughts here?
It's obvious, isn't it? I'm not in my right mind.
You see, when I write, especially in the midst of these challenges where there's that added tick-tick-tick of the alarm clock in the belly of Captain Hook's reptilian pursuer, I am definitely not in my right mind.
There is a psychological process known as compartmentalization going on. It's a form of lying. To illustrate it best, think back a few years ago when President Clinton declared on national television, "I did not have sex with that woman."
He was lying to himself. Because a president lying to himself was incongruent with Bill Clinton's limited perception of self, he was convinced that what he was saying was true. Because there was no intercourse involved. (Okay, that's as far as I travel with that illustration.)
Similarly, when I write, I am compartmentalizing myself into dual entities...wait a sec!...no, make that three entities.
First, there is the man who attends the play.
Secondly, there is the man who is a principal performer in that play.
Two different men; two different roles; one on either side of the curtain.
Third of all, there is the writer. He has creative license with as well as a necessary empathy for each of the first two men.
The lie I tell when I write is the appearance of effortlessness.
Okay, maybe I'm being hard on myself. Maybe, in an oblique manner, I'm being hard on every writer.
My ultimate point is that the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge sucks! It sucks because it forces me to tell the truth. And the truth is simply this: IT IS HARD WORK!
The Value of These Challenges
I would be remiss to end my hub on a ranting note.
Actually, dear reader, there is value--tremendous value--in participating in the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge. Let's take a look at some of them.
The distress hones your skills as a writer. Would there be pearls in the absence of irritant grains of sand? Would a butterfly's wings be strong enough to fly if they hadn't first broken through a cocoon wall? It's just you, a blank screen, and a ticking clock. Make something happen!
You help build a network of global connectivity. Do you think you're writing in a vacuum? Think again. At any given point in the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge, you'll receive a pat on the back from one or more of your teammates empathizing with you, encouraging you, and motivating you to the finish line. Don't forget the value of receiving timely feedback from your readers. They're your most fervent cheerleaders!
Your example of facing the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge head-on is an example to others who are considering similar challenges. One of our goals as writers is to perfect our craft. While we never reach that proverbial perfection, our work in progress can serve as an inspiration to others. What if all of mankind concentrated its energy on inspiring rather than squabbling? Imagine how advanced our civilization might be!
The repetition of meeting a daily goal over an extended period of time requires commitment, discipline, focus, diligence, selflessness, and hard work. Participation in a 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge builds overall character. That's never a bad thing!
Some of the best hubs you have ever written may very well be the result of the 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge. It's just a gut feeling that I have, but I'm willing to hear from other HubPages writers as to whether or not they've found this to be true in their unique experiences.
You may see an increase in hits and followers as well as an accompanying boost to your HubPages earnings by participating in a 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge.
Scientific evidence suggests that doing something for three weeks or more creates a new habit. The 30 Hubs in 30 Days Challenge will make you a creature of habit--a bona fide writer!

5 Hubs Down--Just 25 More to Go! If you'd like to check out more of my writing, please use the link below! Thank you!
Comments
Congrats (a little late) on your 30 day challenge, Hawaiian Odysseus! I also did 30 hubs in 30 days challenge (created it myself because I couldn't find one that was running on hubpages).
It really helped me with my writing.
Happy Writing,
Easylearningweb
wow, sorry I missed this one when it was first published but it's a doozey!!! Hmm, spellcheck is telling me I spelled that word wrong. But when I checked it only gave me the word "doze' as an alternative so I am leaving the spelling. Loved getting inside your head and I loved the description of going to the theater and everything you check before the show starts. Perfect description! As I was reading this, I felt rather badly. Since this 30 Hubs in 30 Days challenge was my idea, I feel as though I am responsible for the stress I put you under during these 30 days. I hope, in the end, you feel it helps you as a writer. You may need to go to the doctor to have your blood pressure checked though!!! I don't want to be responsible for any health issues that develop due to this challenge! And don't forget, no matter how many hubs you write during this challenge, I am still behind you...literally and figuratively!!!
Joe, you pushed all my buttons with this one. I applaud you for attempting this awesome challenge; I laugh at the comical way you present the material (not at you); I feel your tension and sense of anxiety because you take me along for the ride; the anger sneaks up on me as you transfer that fear of success. What an emotional roller coaster you took me on here! I've got my ticket for the next one, so let's go!
;) Pearl
Voted Up+++++
Malama pono....you always have the right answers ;)
Hey there my friend. Like always I enjoyed reading this hub, just like the rest that I've come across. It's another well written and detailed concoction of yours. I recall you mentioning that you were doing the '30 in 30 challenge'. Part of me wanted to participate, but I knew that it would have been extremely difficult with some of the things I have going on this month. I told myself that I wasn't going to do another 30 day challenge after the one I done last summer. It was extremely difficult, and not for the faint of heart. I agree with everything you mentioned in regards to how much of a challenge it is. I commend you for having the guts and fortitude to tackle it. If anyone can finish it up the right way, it's definitely you. Good luck to you my friend. Voted up, rated awesome and shared. Best wishes!
I don't think I could write 30 quality, comprehensive articles like that in 30 days. I, therefore, remain unchallenged.
Hi again! I just noticed your second comment from yesterday to me - it's been a busy day! My 'main' blog is http://www.natashalh.com and it is totally open to public viewing. My other two blogs are kind of like sisters to it and they're all interlinked!
Hi Joe, all the best on your challenge. Your view on this challenge tells us what to expect. Thank you for sharing this with us. Voted up and sharing!
You can do it! Great hub. Writing and writing some more is the only way to get better. When I get depressed at the slowness of publishing hubs I look at some of my older writing. Then sigh a sigh of relieve. I am not still the writer who wrote way back then.
Hawaii,
Um! In your poll, someone thinks they were at a tire shop! I will admit it was me since this is my first 30 and I didn't know else how to vote.
This is indeed hard, isn't it? Glad to hear another admit it. But maybe it will help to hub more a habit.
Nonetheless, You are doing a fantastic job. I don't know how you do it. I couldn't do it if I got behind. But then different people is what makes the world go round.
Fantastic hub. I will wait patiently for the next. (I can say that since I'm busy rattling away on my own hub side LOL.)
Keep up the great work.
Sounds a challenge indeed, you just know how to find your way through challenges, from your writing I can see you are up for many more. Good luck on your great skills and goals
I have no doubt that you will be successful with your "30 hubs in 30 days" challenge. It will most likely take a lot of time and concetration so please be careful not to burn yourself out. At the end of the day, regardless of whether you meet the challenge or not, you have already proven that you are an amazing writer from what I have read thus far. Best of luck to you and take care! -Rose
Hang in there, Joe! You're doing a great job.
The 30-hub challenge sounds like a panic attack waiting to happen. Also, I make less money with each hub I write, so I'm afraid this challenge would end up with me owing HP money.
I love the metaphor you've created. You do make it look easy, though!
I'm still waiting for your new eBay hubs. Don't think I've forgotten . . . ;-)
You are so motivated by a challenge and I wish you much luck and energy in this project.
I did one 30/30 and two 30/60 challenges and remember a feeling of both exhaustion and euphoria...throughout and after.
We can absolutely accomplish anything we set out to do... proud of you!
Thx Joe, I didn't think so, and you don't have to reply back on this one. But, thanks so much for taking the time. I thought so. I'm not really scared hahahahaaaa just having fun. Get to writing bro hahahaa can't wait to see the next one. :~)
Maybe what you need is some throw-away topics. Make a list of 25 questions that you have in your mind--about ANYTHING AT ALL! From the source of white noise to what polar bears eat, to why earthworms don't get stuck moving through soil....anything.
Then, friend, do a little research and write a hub. Publish it quick, just after spell-checking it and scanning it for grammar and continuity errors.
Go on to the next one.
You'll be done before you know it. Don't agonize over them. And believe me, if it's a question in your mind, chances are someone, or maybe even several someones. will Google looking for the answer.
Bravo! I would say this one is Perfect! I also see that the advice you have given to your son, so many years ago, has come back to remind you to face your *fears* head on! This was so delightful and I give you a standing ovation! Shared, tweeted and just love it! UP ++++ across the board! :) Here is an idea for one of your next hubs if you wish. What does the hawaiian lei's mean? Best of luck. Your braver than I am :)
Aloha
Joe, are you deleting my posts hahaaa I have put two here and neither one shows. Well, anyway loved this hub.
Oh, here's my second comment to you, as I am reading other comments:
~ You walked over 6 miles this morning?! Now I feel like a complete light-weight (I mean, wimp). Great job! I was happy when I walked for 45 minutes, and then walked up the 13 flights of stairs today.
~ I read Natasha's blog regularly, and it is fantastic!!! I am one of her fans :)
I wrote a comment Joe, don't know where it went. But loved this hub too. Loved the analogy you used here. I always learn something from your hubs. Thank you, and your witty sense of humor.
Yes!
Your intro is exceptional. Just thought I'd mention it.
There is a flow to your writing, and you never lose the thread that holds it all together. Very good writing my friend.
And I have to run...so very far behind today.
Aloha,
bill
Heyyyy Joe,
You've done it again. Again, very informative and upbuilding, and encouraging. You give me new insight every time I read any of your hubs. Thanks, but you have kind of scared me with this one. hahahahahahaaa I have to practice rhythm I was always the one doing her own dance moves. Keeep up the great work of keeping us entertained we love it.
I like the thought of "feeding the ravenous wolf inside." I've never formally taken the challenge, but I've often thought about it and even kinda, sorta listed it as a short term goal one month. You've reignited my interest in doing it. Maybe the fire will take this time. I have an overall goal of being more focused and more prolific. This will help.
Thanks for the inspiration. Voting up and sharing.
The 30 days challenge would definitly be a challenge for me too because I am working on videos and I am posting on my blogs and my websites as well.... at one point .... there is no more time in the day.
Good of you to do it Joe! I love your writing... always interesting and all kind of topics!
Joe, I wasn't sure how scary the view inside your head would be, but I read this, and I love it! You're honest, and the entire introduction sets it up. I love how you compare it to a play.
This is encouraging to read, and also to think that participating in a 30/30 could help writing on a regular basis become habit. As nerve-wracking as it must be to hear the clock ticking, their are many benefits to it.
Well done on another hub, and good luck! You're trucking along quite well, I think :)
I hope you had an enjoyable weekend.
~ Kathryn
Joe-Now that five hubs have been published in a short time span your tremendous success is incipient and we are sure you will show us how to meet such challenge head on by dint of commitment, discipline, focus, diligence and hard work. Thank you my dear friend. Wish you all the best.
Aloha.
Arun Kanti
"...dry and stilted..." if you, my friend, are dry and stilted I'd hate to think what I am! Your writing is always so warm and interesting. You draw us in, or should I say suck us in ;)
The 30/30 Challenge is definitely a challenge. If you think its tough now, wait'll you get to day 20 and don't know what to write about...sorry, just reminiscing. However, at the end of the 30 days and 30 hubs, yes, you will have more followers, you may have written a great hub, but most of all it does build your "writing character". See, you've learned already :)
I know you're only on hub 5 but as we say in my family, "You're doing a heck of a job!"
Voted up, useful, funny, awesome, and interesting. I wish there was an insightful button 'cause I'd choose that one too! Sharing cause you really are a great writer my friend. Aloha!
I don't know how you're doing it - I don't think that I could turn out that many hubs in such a short time. I think that it's a great challenge, and that you're right - it gets you in the habit of writing, and that the writing becomes easier and more natural as you progress. I'm enjoying reading your work as you continue on this journey. As far as becoming a bona fide writer, as far as I'm concerned you were already there!
I don't always post both Saturday and Sunday, but I post at least Monday-Friday on my main blog! Like you said, I sort of have a rhythm. =)
I don't think I could to a 30 in 30 challenge! I already blog on at least a daily basis. There is no way I could write a hub each day, too! Kudus to you and best wishes!
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