Using HubPages for Shameless Self Promotion is WRONG

It has come to my attention that sometimes people use HubPages to promote themselves in disgusting, slimy, self-important ways. They do things like put links in their hubs that are intended to do nothing but drive traffic to their own websites or Facebook pages or other things. It is totally selfish, and doing that sort of thing represents a wanton disregard for propriety and the type of humility that Greek philosophers spoke of and that some of the guys in the Bible wrote about. It’s bad stuff.

For example, if I were to point out that I had recently created a Facebook page under my writing name Shadesbreath (http://facebook.com/Shadesbreath) and then made a big deal out of it by writing a hub pointing to it and making a conspicuous show of all the fun and hilarity that might be had by clicking “like” on such a page, that could only be construed as salacious, smarmy and grotesque. I would never do that. I mean, yes, I did just create that page, and yes it would be awesome if people all went and “liked” it and then played along with all my Shadesbreath reindeer games, but I would never do it. It would be embarrassing to do something like that. It would be like lowering myself to the level of the people who do that. The peasants. The serfs. The rascals, knaves and louts.

Do I seem like the loutish type?

Clearly not. (As will be proven by the poll to the right in time).

So I felt, having discovered this abominable behavior by some hubbers, that I should speak out on this issue. I felt that someone needed to comment on the degree of narcissism necessary to A) even make such a page, and B) then go about promoting it like some slattern waggling her plump buttocks at drunken sailors as they teeter down the gangplank after six months at sea. So I won’t do that. It would be wrong.

Despite how nice it would be to shout to the world: "HEY GO LOOK AT MY PAGE AT: http://facebook.com/Shadesbreath AND MAKE SURE TO LIKE IT,” I would never stoop to that. Nor would I stoop to letting people know it has this really cute picture of a puppy and a kitten snuggling up together that has a funny comment as part of my experiment to see how many "likes" I can get. I wouldn't talk about the hot chick on there or the dreamy dude with awesome abs I put on their either. I just wouldn't mention that because I am not a slattern. And besides, I look terrible in a miniskirt so, frankly, if I tried to do the slattern thing, it wouldn’t work. I look horrible in plaid and half-shirts don't really work for my otherwise awesome physique. Can you say, “Short-bearded Santa in a Japanese schoolgirl uniform?”

You probably can say it, but would you want to?

Now, despite having made it perfectly clear how I feel about that sort of self-aggrandizing behavior, it is possible that some HubPages moderator or another might come along and see my examples as being exactly the sort of thing that I am arguing against. So, it is to those moderators that I first wave and say, “Hi,” and then point out that I am clearly not in support of that kind of overly promotional activity and am in fact, through my examples, helping make their jobs easier. And just to make sure everyone reading this is perfectly clear, I am in no way suggesting that anyone go to Facebook and search for the term Shadesbreath and then click LIKE on the hilariously funny images that come up as part of the clever mechanism I put there to get people to like my page. Anyone who reads this and goes to Facebook and searches for that term, or who clicks on the links that I provided above solely as an example of what not to do has almost missed the point entirely. That said, I simply want to make sure that any HubPages moderator tempted to do evil and cruel things to this helpful and totally pro-HubPages hub understands how totally NOT in any violation this hub actually is despite how in some ways it might be argued that it is a total violation of the most insidious and flagrant kind. I would also like to point out how amazing a job HubPages moderators do, how awesome they are as people and as lovers--I have only heard rumors, but wow, names like Apollo and Jenna Jameson come up as comparisons whenever anyone brings this topic up. So, thanks, moderators, for all you do.

So, that said, I feel I have done my duty in making sure people understand how uncouth and shameful self promotion is, and that I feel anyone attempting to divert traffic from Hubpages to another site like the really clever and actively enjoyable site I mentioned above that can be found by searching Shadesbreath on Facebook but that should not be searched based on this article because of how wrong it would be is, in fact, a knave, lout and all that other stuff I said before.

So there you have it.

Have a lovely day.