A Tribute To Corey Haim-Life Is So Very Precious!
Like many people I was very saddened and upset to hear about the death of child star actor, Corey Haim, on March 10th, 2010. As a tribute to this beloved wonderful actor, I went to my VHS case and took out my copies of the movies I have he played/starred in: Silver Bullett. The Lost Boys. and Watchers. Lucas is on my 'to buy' list, as I loved him in that flic as well.
This sad story is another tragic reminder that fame and fortune do not exempt anyone from the cost of not befriending and dealing with our 'personal demons' We all have them and if we do not acknowledge, confront, befriend and learn from them, they will turn on us and can destroy us. This has happened far too many times and not only in Hollywood, Los Angeles or wherever. Yes, perhaps living in LA in the 1980's made things easier and more tempting to turn to drug abuse as part of Corey's lifestyle. Yet, I say that temptation will always be there. It's a grand teacher for all of us. To simply remove something from our self that is not good for us, does not guarantee that we necessarily learn the lesson/s that our vices and addictions have to teach us.
My heart goes out to Corey and he is in my heart and thoughts. As a professional psychic I welcome and invite his spirit to pay me a visit anytime he should or might desire, just as I enjoy the company of many spirits from all walks of life, as mediumship is a big part of my psychic work. I believe that we are all telepathic and psychic to some degree and we can train our minds to communicate in many more ways than most people are accustomed to doing. I believe this can happen because there is a thread of unity and kinship that runs through us all. I am convinced that we are all 'Gods children'. We are the world. We are the children in that wonderful song that Michael Jackson and Lionel Ritchie wrote which came out in 1985 and the proceeds went for charity in Africa. That song is beautiful and full of truth.
That song reminded me of something I've always felt and known in my heart and soul. We are all related. We are family. If I harm another soul then I harm myself. And nobody is perfect. We all say and do things we come to regret. But let us learn compassion for our own faltering and faults as well as those in others.
Even though I never met Corey Haim in person, I am still very affected by his tragic death as many people are. This is partly because we are kindred spirits so to speak. I am very familiar with addictions and have dealt with what my sister calls 'the family curse' for many years. Alcoholism is rampant on both sides of my family along with mental illness. I have struggled with 'the desire to partake of the spirits' for many years. I have been on and off the wagon many times. I am much more balanced than I used to be, but I still have to be on constant guard of wanting to live up to my name Dennis, which is the Greek derivative of Dionysus, god of the vine, ecstasy, mystic, lover and wanderer. I lost a brother at the age of forty-nine who was an alcoholic and my baby brother died of AIDS at the young age of twenty-seven. He too was a big drinker and he took drugs as well.
If people don't think we all have 'an inner child' inside of us then the moon is never full or the sun never rises. That child is very much alive and whether he/she be well or unwell and unhappy depends upon a lot of things; one of which is the childhood we underwent and how we dealt or did not deal with whatever childhood abuse, or traumas we may have experienced. I read that Corey told some rehab doctor or personnel "I don't need help." Well, as the comic says, "denial ain't just a river in Egypt." If we don't admit we are out of control and need help, we can never get it. It's all a personal choice. I do not know what kind of abuse Corey Haim may have experienced, if any, though if I recall, it seems there was some mention to something of that nature.
As I say in my self-help spiritual book, Halfway To Heaven the call compels the response. At a very young age, I sought professional help because I was having horrible nightmares about my father trying to kill me. This was not at all surprising because he used to actually say that it would be nothing for him to do that and he always put me down. He lived up to his name Adolph. He was even called 'little adolf Hitler' when he was a boy. People say names don't have meaning. Maybe they do. Oh, no, my father never did actually try to kill me, he did not want to go to prison for murder. Nonetheless, his harsh cruel words were sharper than a two-edged sword. They did as much, if not more, damage than physical blows could have done. Although I am unusually sensitive, I am and have always been a fighter. Having grown up in a horrible home and being in four foster homes during my teen age years, sure I was emotionally a mess and whacked for years. But like I said, I am a fighter. I sought out counseling. I went into therapy for many years. Lots of TA..Transactional Analysis helped me get in touch with my inner child, adult and parent. In time I did learn to believe and feel that I'm OK, You're OK, to quote one of my all time favorite psychology books. I was also helped by Gestalt Therapy, Free Association, Freudian, Dream Interpretation. Hypnosis. I did it all.
I also discovered that there is a completely different person inside all of us. That person or being is our 'soul' or higher self as AA refers to our higher power. Once we make that spiritual connection, we have access to so much more knowing and can get answers and insight to anything. One of the reasons for so much drug, alcohol, food and other addictions is the emptiness inside people who have not connected with their soul. We live in a world that values capitalism, and puts priority on the materialistic comforts, job, prestige and so forth. This is fine and dandy, but if the soul is not nurtured then our spirit starts to shrivel and you can bet your bottom dollar that's when the voices of the addictions come a callin!
I am very familiar with those 'ghost whispers' as I call them. They have haunted me for years and love to tempt me to just end my life so I can go to a better place. First, of all I don't believe that suicides go to a better place. And secondly, like in Jean Paul Sartre's play, No Exit, I don't believe there is any where to escape to. We take our problems right with us into the next life. My metaphysical spiritual teachings tell me that we have to come back and work out and resolve our issues in future lifetimes. So we may as well get it right in this life, no matter the price, so we don't flunk out of earth school and have to come back and reenroll.
That, as well as the intense love for all people, and desire to help, are what keep me from doing myself in. And yes, my plants, opera, my poetry nature walks, movies and the books I read and write keep me going and give me some joie de vivre, love of life as the French say.
As my therapist friend Elizabeth used to say, I have bowed many times to the porcelain goddess. When my baby brother died in 1997 I nearly had a nervous breakdown. All I could do was weep and think of how bad it was that my parents gave him away in adoption, at the age of one, and how I never got to see him. Then when I got to see him at the age of 27 he was emaciated and in the final stages of full blown AIDS and died a week later. Yes, I know things happen for a reason. Yes, he did not go to hell. Maybe such a short tragic life was part of his soul contract mission he had agreed to before birth? I do not know and I do not care to know the answers for those questions.
What I do know is the adult and parent and spiritual part of me could accept that we all carve our own destines and create our realities. But, that part, I was just talking about, the inner child, did not understand the spiritual truths, teachings and realities that I write and counsel people about in my psychic work. And he does not have to. I have learned to honor this part of myself. So when Bradley died I became a depressed weeping drunk for six months. I knew I would not stay in the pit. When my friends would say I should know better because I am a spiritual counselor and advisor, I would say 'kiss me where the sun don't shine.'
Yes, it takes one to know one. I do not know what inner demons and skeletons were lurking in the basement and closet of Corey Haim's subconscious mind. I do not know what drove him to need more and more drugs to maintain and sustain his habit. I read that he admitted to taking up to eighty-five valiums in one day; not to mention the vicodin, soma and other pills he was on. Geez, his stomach must have been made of steel is all that I can say. I do know that my heart feels for him and for other addicts.
I have read that some tortured addicted souls are star children whose origins are far away on distant realms. I can accept that there is life on other planets. I have always felt a strong connection to Venus and even visited Venus in my astral body once. I admit to having many other worldly visitors and they form the basis of my new book God's Many Mansions and I share some stories in my book Morning Coffee With God, currently available on amazon. Could Corey Haim have been a 'lost boy' who never felt at home on the earth as many of we star children do? Many of us have star-gazed since childhood, overcome with nostalgia and a deep yearning for our distant home that we cannot name or see. Was Corey paying off some past life debts and trying to work through some emotional issues from this lifetime and/or past life times? Perhaps. Or was this just a lifetime to experience taking it over the edge so to speak? I do not have the answers.
My prayer is that people who struggle with addictions can come to meet and befriend their inner self, or higher self as some call it. Knowing this other part and having it to confide in, is what keeps me sane in an insane world. Even though my ego or 'little me' often fights with the bigger higher self me, I am grateful to have made this connection. It creates my art, poetry and my books. It challenges and makes me think. It fills me with stories and inspiration. I never need TV. I write about spiritual things that my ego can or even won't accept at times. But the professor student part of me always listens with an open mind. That is all I think that we can expect of our self.
I admit that my heart longs for the star worlds of my ancient origins, on realms, where love and beauty are so much more valued and experienced than human love or beauty could begin to approximate here on the earth. I love to play in the fields of dreams and gladness where I go in my dreams, meditations and spirit journeys. I love the many wonderful wise beings who meet me in the realms of the no-time. I have had many angelic visitations for which I am humbly grateful for. Those visitations helped me so much and gave me hope and I tell these stories in my books.
I have and am learning that life on the earth can be worthwhile. We can stop and smell the roses along the way. We can spread love and good deeds. What a thrill to see the smile upon someone's face when we encourage, make them feel special and make their day. Life is very precious I am learning. Seeing the tragic loss of people like Corey Haim (there have been many others) remind us even more of the need to make each day count. His story also reminds me that there by the grace of God go I. I try to never judge a fellow soul. I could be on skid row in a heart beat and know I have been in lives past.
I also believe that this is the lifetime that really counts most. We can overcome our past life struggles and work out our karma. I know for I, among many, are doing just that. I am a tortured artist becoming untortured. I was a struggling French Impressionist female painter in my last life in Paris, France. Interesting that I learned fluent French in two years, eh? And had constant deja-vu when I went to France in college. Dying a bitter woman who hated men and her art, all that creative energy did not just fade to dust as my body did after I died. That passion for art had to go somewhere for it is pure energy as everything is energy. It has to be transformed into something. So in this lifetime I am still an artist. Except now I paint with words. And yes, it has been hell. In my early '50's I am just really getting my 'dream' launched. I'm a steam roller now, my new nick-name is Steam Roller and Energizer. But for years I stopped and started and struggled ad infinitum.
Corey Haim will always have a place in my heart. I welcome his spirit to stop by and say hello anytime he feels like it. His death makes me even more bound and determined to get at the complete bottom of what fuels my depression and anger, and to heal and completely move through it. And move on as the saying goes. My therapist used to say 'therapy works if we work it.' I know it works. Perhaps Corey Haim did not have the strength, will or even desire to take the plunge and dive into the depths of his deeper being and find out how he truly ticked and the origins of his addiction. Many people do not and like Thoreau said, "most live quiet lives of desperation." I have learned that pain and addictions are our teachers and can make us stronger, but does not make the lessons any easier by any means. I know I am much stronger due to my horrible childhood, but I sure would not want to ever repeat it again.
They say when life gives you lemons make lemonade. I've decided to keep honey close by at all times for such occasions. I believe that through perceptual shifting, therapy, inner self work and the countless wonderful books, counselors and people out there, that each of us who struggle with addictions can find answers. We can heal. We can make a difference by our example. That is what keeps me going when I get bored and want to exit and go home as beloved ET said in that delightful Steven Spielberg film. I do not believe we have earned the right to say "beam me up Scotty" until we accomplish what we set out to do in this lifetime. Until that time comes I try to and encourage clients and friends to take it one day at a time.
God bless you, Corey Haim, and may your soul truly rest in peace. You are in my heart everyday. Maybe I knew you in a previous lifetime, because I've always felt a connection to you. Who cares if people think I'm off my rocker for saying this. We are all children of God/Goddess/All that Is. We've no doubt all known each other in some lifetime or other. And since time does not exist in the grander scheme, perhaps, I shall meet you, Corey Haim, in dream time. And we can stories, hopes and dreams!