I recently received a “Dear Jane” letter from a woman I knew. She was announcing how she was disassociating herself from us because we didn’t quite meet her standards. We did not complete tasks as fast as she thought we should. We did not have enough people helping us. We were currently in a building that was a work in progress and her and her husband had been telling us for a long time to move to the more expensive area since the buildings looked better. We were a little flabbergasted. She never volunteered to help unless we footed the entire bill (and they have a ton of money!). When volunteers are needed, we rarely get anyone so we do it all ourselves. That showed us to be n fault according to her. At one time we were in a study together and were each asked what we needed to recover or correct in our lives. She announced that she had nothing to fix. There were no problems in her life. Hello! Arrogance, dear.
We had a friend who decided to tell us what all we were doing wrong. We were raising our kids wrong because they were so disrespectful. This shocked us as we usually get compliments on them. Not saying they are perfect, but the way he talked our kids were wild heathens. By the way, he has no children of his own. He then proceeded on a discourse of the problems in our marriage was and what we should do about it. This from someone who never said, “I do”. He then said that if my husband could be a certified teacher then nothing should hold this man back (lacking education and training need not be mentioned). Is this arrogance again calling?
A dear relative just can’t say anything nice. My daughter stood up to sing a solo in church. She was a nervous wreck. Afterwards, the woman told it was good if only……. My daughter hasn’t sung in church since.
A family gathering and pot luck is the theme. I bring my dish. What does the cousin say? “Oh, you make those? I wonder if they are as good as mine. Why don’t have a cook off?” I hate potluck with the family.
I was meeting some of my husband’s family for the first time. I was having a conversation with a few of them when a distant relative corrected how I pronounced a local city. I pronounced it the way the locals did. She said I should pronounce it the way the French would. I’m not in France.
Another family gathering while I was a new bride – I was new so I didn’t say much. When an aunt asked about my hometown, I talked for a few minutes. This was the first time I really said anything while the rest of them never ever let their tongues rest. One aunt interrupted me not long after I began talking to complain about much I talked. She proceeded to go through the house telling them all. I still don’t talk around them if I can help it.
We deal with them everywhere we go: the workplace, family gatherings, the neighbors, social clubs, school, the store, church, and so on. You cannot turn a corner without meeting the height of arrogance. But what if you turned that corner and saw a mirror? No, there is no way it could be you in that reflection.
Do you have a problem with arrogance? Most people would feel that they have no problems what so ever with arrogance. Everyone I know that wears the badge of “Arrogance” like a trophy vehemently deny that they are arrogant. They feel like they are just stating simple facts. In their eyes, they have no need to understand humility a little better. In fact, the ones who need the largest introduction to humility are the ones who deny it the loudest.
So, in order to help those poor souls out here is a survey that they need to take. And let’s be honest with each and every answer.
You Need Humility if......
1. No one can cook near as good as you.
2. You cannot give a compliment without adding how you could have done it better.
3. All ideas from other people suck.
4. Everyone should come to you for answers.
5. You have no problems in life.
6. You cannot enter a store that has any items below $100.
7. When helping with a charity cause, you wear all the gold you possess.
8. Everyone else’s mistakes are worse than yours.
9. Other people need to fix their lives before you start on yours.
10. You are the smartest person on the planet.
11. You have to correct the pronunciation of others.
12. You constantly talk about your trouble gaining weight around others who have the opposite.
13. Your views on all subjects are the only ones that can be discussed.
14. You could always do it better.
15. Conversation centers around you.
16. You can only point out the reasons why someone shouldn’t do something.
17. Encouragement is a foreign word to you.
18. The latest fad is always bad because you were not on board first.
19. The level of your education is in the forefront of your mind and the tip of your tongue.
20. You tell others how to raise their kids though you have none.
21. Telling others how to handle their marriage though you never have been.
22. If someone else can do it, you know that you surely can.
23. If you refuse to listen to another opinion.
24. When you find another person’s mistake, you publicly point it out.
25. When your mistakes are found, you brush them off as insignificant.
26. You have to label everyone around you.
27. You just have to tell everyone how to do things though you refuse to take any direction.
28. You have to be in charge of all things around you and don't mind pushing people to do it.
If you answered yes to any of these, you have an issue with arrogance!!!!!!!! So now, the question becomes, “Do you want to change?” If so, then I highly recommend reading Humility: True Greatness by C.J. Mahaney. It is an excellent read that will help you begin your road down Humility Lane. It’s not easy but you’ll like what you see in the mirror a lot more.