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Facebook Predators with HG Tudor's Comments

Updated on July 29, 2017
Tamara Moore profile image

Poetry and Stories to help raise awareness, and insight, into intrusive, and dangerous, personality disorders, and to encourage healing.

Online Support Groups

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Knowing the Narcissist

Special thanks to Mr. HG Tudor for his assistance with this article by contributing his beneficial and validating comments which are below this article. Following this article is also a video by Mr. Tudor on Online Predators, and further down, a link to his interactive blog site.

Suspicious Narcissists

Narcissist Abuse Syndrome

Facebook Online Support Groups for Narcissist Victims can be an Abuser’s Paradise. Narcissists can find valuable supply and fuel via vulnerable, and recently traumatized victims. I have personally experienced this entire circus performance from these masked deceivers, and could compose a lengthy, and concise account on the dark details that occurred in this particular Secret Facebook “Support Group” for Narcissist Abuse Victims, that was "heroically" run by actual Narcissists, and their tag-along minions. But, I have no intent, whatsoever, in exposing anyone, as this is not my purpose. I only wish to write for the sake of helping others to become more aware of the dangers regarding these deceptive entities administrating online support groups.

Victims of Narcissist Abuse are usually extremely vulnerable before they have begun their healing process, and even when in the early stages of recovery, and beyond.

Idealization - The Good?

When a victim, who has recently been discarded by a Narcissist, and left with the painful void from dependency, that a relationship with a Narcissist can bring about, is fed the delicious substance needed to fulfill this ravenous hunger, via an online support group administered by Narcissists, it can feel not only relieving, but extraordinary! Frankly, the lure of the possibility at replenishing this stark emptiness, by anyone, or anything, after having been completely separated from the Narcissist, is akin to receiving "that next fix". This is how intense the victim's dependence to the Narcissist can actually be.

Narcissists' Masks

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Hence, when a recent victim comes upon one of these pseudo online support groups, which are administered by actual Narcissists, he/she might begin to believe that they have met their perfect family, via the amazingly interactive Administrators. And, of course, the "support group" reiterates these feelings by idealizing the victim with statements including, "We missed you so much while you were gone for those entire two days, in fact, one of the Administrators was actually thinking about leaving the group if you hadn't come back to rejoin us!" Or, "Everyone here just loves your wonderful company, and your knowledgeable input!" Or even, "We would like you to join us, and actually be an Administrator, too!"

Idealization, Devaluation, and Discard

Narcissists are Dangerous

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Devaluation - The Bad

Of course, when the Devaluation Phase of the "support group's" behavior comes riding in on its thick-snouted warthog, is the precise time when those same vulnerabilities and voids which were formerly tended to, so exquisitely, will be attacked with insidious, but exceedingly painful blows of damaging abuse tactics including, Triangulation, Purposeful Neglect, (a stark contrast from the outpouring of previous attention that the victim was deliberately receiving while being groomed by this "support group"), Bullying, Twisting of Words, Blaming, Shaming, "Under the Radar" Manipulation, ETC., so as to entirely break down the victim's spirit, in the same manner as was done so by his/her former Narcissist.

Smear Campaign

Instantaneous blocking, (without being given a reason why the victim was blocked), and/or enduring the intimidating experience of having the other Administrators gang up on the targeted individual, and possibly even going as far as attempting to smear the victim’s reputation, (Smear Campaign), all are abusive tactics of which could begin occurring in the Devaluation Phase, after the initial Idealization Phase, (when the target was being handsomely groomed), true to the "three-step" abuse pattern seen with a singular Narcissist: 1). Idealization, 2). Devaluation, 3). The Discard.

Cliques

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Of course, there are sincere online support groups out there which offer invaluable enlightenment, and insight into the confusing deceptions, and mind games, in which Narcissists are commonly known to undertake, as well as offering comforting, and validating fellowship with others who have also been in these types of horrific, abusive relationships.

Discard - The Ugly

In the Discard Stage, the corrupt "support group" Narcissistic Administrators, might viciously gang up on the targeted individual, and single this person out, ostracizing him/her for the most, intangible, minute reasons, so as to induce the confused victim to leave the “support group” on their own, so that the abusers can protect themselves, if questioned later on, by arrogantly stating, "Well, ("so, and so") didn’t get kicked out, rather, they left by their own choice, and was really an overly-emotional person to begin with." (Baiting is previously carried out, in this scenario, so as to get the victim's desired emotional reactions, and thus, further exploiting the victim's responses through the commonly used Narcissist's textbook Gaslighting technique).

Den of Wolves

Thrill of The Chase

The vicious entities, on these particular support groups, might even boast of their careers, outside of Facebook, as Domestic Violence Advocates, Volunteers for Abuse Victims, Relationship Advisers, and many other endless "helping occupations" of interest, which makes their abuse that much more confusing, and disorienting, to the targeted individual. It is actually a wake-up call into the dark reality of that, in which corrupt "online support" groups are not only readily capable of carrying out upon vulnerable victims, but thoroughly relish, with ruthless exhilaration, as they cunningly proceed undetected by the majority.



HG Tudor's Observations

Below are Mr. H.G. Tudor's observations concerning Facebook Online Support Groups:

"The various FB support groups are curious places indeed. I have sat in the shadows of several observing the behaviours of those who post there in order that I might learn more about the behaviours of my kind, and that of the victims. I have the following observations:

* These groups are hunting grounds for our kind (Narcissists and Sociopaths). They are chock-full of emotional, desperate people and it is like shooting fish in a barrel. Indeed, your own experience, Tamara, is testimony to this.

* There are a lot of bullies in these places. Some are Narcissists, and others are "holier than thou" victims who believe if someone tries to understand the Narcissist's perspective, then they must be a Narcissist, as well, and they jump on that person. I find that pathetic." H.G. Tudor


Online Support Groups

Have you ever had an Online Support Group Hurt, instead of Help, You?

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HG Tudor: Facebook Predators

Knowledge And Education

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Forgiveness

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Second Guessing Ourselves

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© 2017 Tamara Yancosky

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    • Tamara Moore profile image
      Author

      Tamara Yancosky 7 weeks ago from No Idea Where

      Dangerous Trance With a Sociopath

      She thought she had found her prince,

      but he turned out to be a dreadful frog;

      He told her she was his sweet princess,

      but he treated her worse than a rabid dog.

      When she told him the relationship was over,

      he became vicious and smeared her name;

      It further validated her reasons for leaving him,

      and she could finally see all of his toxic shame.

      His Red Flags had been shown to her early on,

      and viewed by her very clearly in this dance.

      But, she chose to hide from every one of them,

      because being in-love put her in such a gratifying trance.

      But, now she is so much stronger;

      She is cloaked with the armor of self-love and self-respect.

      She figuratively boils every new frog she meets,

      and makes sure the past ones do not return to reinfect.

      © 2017 Tamara Yancosky Moore

    • Tamara Moore profile image
      Author

      Tamara Yancosky 3 months ago from No Idea Where

      MsDora, please be careful anytime you are online because there are predators who pretend to be someone whom they are not. I never knew about this until it happened to me. Thank you for your very kind comment about Mr. Tudor. He writes books that help people avoid Narcissists, and also books on how to better heal, and become stronger even if we do have the unfortunate experience of becoming ensnared by a Narcissist Personality Disorder individual.

      He has greatly helped my own journey through healing and recovery, and I find him to be very respectful, responsive, and extremely helpful. But, I must not forget that he still is a Malignant Narcissist/Sociopath. So, we must still be very wary and cautious that we do not forget about this. But, he said he does no ill harm to those in whom he counsels via his medically prescribed services to others.

      Thank you, MsDora, for your lovely visit!

      Big Hugs,

      Tamara

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 months ago from The Caribbean

      Tamara, your first two quotes are frightening, but the thought actually crossed my mind. Thanks for introducing Mr. H.G. Tudor and his work.

    • Tamara Moore profile image
      Author

      Tamara Yancosky 3 months ago from No Idea Where

      Thank you, Jay! This is very wise advice. Of course, I do try to write about things of this nature in hopes of helping others. But, apart from this subject, I have a very rewarding life, with my lovely family, and not too long ago, I went on a vacation to New York, and also Fort Bragg! It was very much fun:-) I also have upcoming plans, as well. I am so thankful for my life in which The Good Lord has given to me.

      Hugs,

      Tamara

    • Jay C OBrien profile image

      Jay C OBrien 3 months ago from Houston, TX USA

      1. When you are truly upset see a mental health professional at a hospital or legitimate clinic. Do NOT get help Online.

      2. Learn to move forward. Learn from the past, but do not be controlled by it. Set your ideal and focus on it. Move on.

    • Tamara Moore profile image
      Author

      Tamara Yancosky 3 months ago from No Idea Where

      You are welcome, Exploring. And, thank you for your very kind comment. It was definitely a learning lesson for me.

      Hugs,

      Tamara

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 3 months ago from Southern Illinois

      I can't imagine associating with this type of person. I would be hesitant to join any kind of support group, especially online. Thanks for the info. It's good to know their tactics.

    • Tamara Moore profile image
      Author

      Tamara Yancosky 3 months ago from No Idea Where

      Thank you, Mr. H.G. Tudor, for your valuable insight, contribution, and cooperation!

      Tamara