Dreamers Follow Their Quests
I have always loved the song "The Impossible Dream' from the musical 'Man of La Mancha'. I have performed it many times publicly on stage and sing it to myself when I need a lift. My favorite lines are "this is my quest to follow that star, no matter how hopeless, no matter how far."
I believe that our beloved Creator put us here on the earth as human beings whose dreams are constantly in the process of realization and coming true. But we must remember that God helps those who help themselves. We can't just sit back and expect our dreams to plop out of the sky or from the depths of our soul into our laps so to speak.
We must follow our quest which involves becoming more receptive and sensitive so that we may hear the soft voice of our guides and our muse in the silence. It is they who will help us become more acquainted with and familiar with our dreams. Some of us are naturally more on the emotional sensitive side. We are often natural empaths and feel a lot of sympathy and compassion for people.
This is a very positive quality that I am grateful to have always possessed. I have learned from the school of hard knocks that sometimes we have to pull away and let people learn their own lessons and from their own mistakes. We cannot be rescuers for every soul on the planet. We can be good examples to others. One such way is to be true to our heart and to be daring and willing to follow the quest for our dreams.
Some of us more sensitive individuals who possess a creative artistic nature can be very susceptible to the opinions, thoughts, ideas and criticism of others. We may tend to wear our hearts on our sleeves. I was this way for years. It took a long time before I would share any of my poetry with anybody. I did not really think I was a very good poet. And when I finally began to muster enough courage to share some poems and writings, I realized that I still did not really believe in the value of my art. That was even when I began getting more compliments encouraging me to continue writing and to start sending some things out to publishers. My friend Janet would say, "Michael, your poems are beautiful. They go to the seat of the soul and are so moving. People will be drawn to your art. You have to get it out there. Get yourself a nice book cover designed and land a decent publisher. Then I'll be more than happy to carry your poetry in my bookstore."
I'd smile and thank Janet for her kind words and proceed to do virtually nothing about promoting my art. There can be many reasons that cause us to hold back from the level of productivity we are capable of. Laziness, procrastination, boredom, lack of interest, depression, a miserable childhood, unfulfilled past lives where we were not appreciated for our art. The last two were major contributors to my lack of drive and fears to pursue my writing whole heartedly like I have always felt I was capable of, and part of me ached for that very thing.
Many years of therapy and some past life work helped me understand a lot but it did not work out my unresolved 'karma' as that Impressionist painter in Paris, France in my last life. I came into this life as a tortured artist and now I say that I am a tortured artist becoming untortured. That is ultimately each of our destiny. Our task is to face and befriend our inner demons, shadows and fears then to heal and merge with them so they can serve us and offer their many gifts. Yes, our despair and pain has many gifts to offer us. Just as old man Death handed the boy over to old man Life in my story, so can our despair help lead us to Joy and Happiness. This is a sacred soul journey we must each eventually make.
I believe that if we squelch our dreams for too long that our soul begins to shrivel and we can find ourselves victims of depression and all sorts of destructive vices. At least that is what happened to me. I would find myself in the pit of despair and gloom and it became a major chore to even get out of bed. I ate too much. I slept too much. I cried too much. I drank too much. This went off and on for years. See what I mean? Only one who has been there can really comprehend what I am talking about. It was like a big black shadow monster would come over me and, to be honest, I really didn't want to live any longer. That is how bad things got.
Finally, out of sheer desperation I forced myself to sit behind my computer. I asked my muse if she were out there anywhere to please come forward and give me some words. To my surprise I found that she showed up almost immediately. I wrote a story which personified Death as a mentor who carried us to the mountain of sorrow and handed us over to an old man, who was a metaphor for life. I was kind of taken back how I just could sit back and whip out a story like that. My friends loved it and said it had a lot of symbolism and hidden meanings and that I should submit it. Shaking and trembling, I did just that. To my delight my story Shadow Chaser was published a few months later.
Needless to say that gave me some feeling of triumph so I sat down and asked my muse to return once more. The call compels the response I suppose. She showed up again instantly and I wrote a new poem, 'The Dreamer', which I share below. Then other poems and stories came. There was more success but nothing major. Still it felt good to see my name in print even if I received no monetary payment for my writings. Occasionally the magazines would come up with some attractive creative images next to the title. I enjoyed looking at those. One drew a wizard for my whale story, Rotah, and I cried when I saw how detailed and good the drawing really was.
I made a choice to continue writing and my muse never once stood me up. As a matter of fact she became a regular companion. She would even wake me up in the wee hours of the morning at times. Before I knew what I had done, there would be anywhere from 5 to ten pages of scribbled writings which turned out to be stories or articles.
To my joy and satisfaction I noticed that when I write, I am not depressed. So for that reason, if nothing else, do I continue to write. Many years later at the ripe young age of fifty-two, I am still writing. I have a self-help spiritual book to my name, Halfway To Heaven, and in May of 2009 my book of some two hundred love poems, Dawn's Kiss, was published by a North Carolina publisher. I have another spiritual book, Morning Coffee With God, that is being published by OzarkMountain publishing in early 2010. I am working on a trilogy: Memories of Atlantis. I have enough poems for a second book of poetry and I keep writing new ones.
So take it from me, if you are the artistic sensitive type, please honor your dreams and follow your quest. You will never be happy until you do and it does get easier with practice and dedication. That I have learned the hard way over some twenty years.
I still struggle with depression at times. It can become really a pain in the you know what and be very bothersome. I refuse to go any kind of meds. The best medicine is to write and make contacts with other writers on hub pages and other internet sites, and to contact bookstores about carrying my books and sponsoring me for book signings. My inner child still has issues with rejection and disappointments. Having been constantly put down and mentally and emotionally beat up by my father as a child wounded me deeply. I am not completely healed. For example, I realized how I kept avoiding calling the local bookstores to see if they were interested in carrying Dawn's Kiss. I made up various excuses then finally I just came out and told myself that I was afraid of rejection. Once I got those cards laid on the table, the energy shifted, and realized I had the choice to honor that fear but not let it immobilize me. So, with hands trembling and knees shaking I started calling the Cincinnati local bookstores: Jo Beth, and Borders. To my surprise, everyone was so nice to me. The sales assistants would thank me for calling, and for choosing them. They would put me in contact with the managers and then wish me a nice day.
And to think I somehow had it in my mind that they would be curt and impatient for me to intrude on their busy schedule. Where did such negative thoughts come from? That little inner child of mine who still has some issues. Trust was a big deal for my inner child. And that the men were just as nice as the women was another welcomed surprise because for many years I was actually intimidated by men and distrustful of them. I attribute it to my father's emotional abuse and cruelty. I don't know why I assumed that all men were mean like my father, but I guess little children sometimes make choices about people without having all the information.
I have learned that we can become good parents to our inner child. I have been working on this for many years and still am. And I say inner child work is worth it for it is our inner child who believes in dreams and magic and who will help the dreamer part of us succeed in our quest. Long live the dreamers!
Under the starlit sky I stand gazing.
With outstretched arms reaching upward,
I grasp for my dreams.
I need not touch them for their radiance to feed my soul.
The soul needs dreams for its nourishment.
Without them it shrivels like a plant denied sunlight.
I know not their origin, nor does it seem possible to touch them.
Still I seek to behold their essence and
I desire to encase them in concrete form.
Perhaps the Imagination bridges spirit and matter
and dreams and form.
They will one day show their face to me.
This I believe.
Inspiration knows no limits.
O muses, lift me higher and higher past this mortal realm!
Let me play in the Elysian Fields with the gods and goddesses,
and drink from their fountains clear and sweet.
I close my eyes.
Bacchus intoxicates me with celestial drink.
Soon I see the stars far below.
I reach down and touch them.
The muses embrace me tenderly, smiling.
In their eyes I behold my dreams one by one.
by Michael Dennis
Michael Dennis (513) 281-5696 - author Halfway to Heaven, Dawn's Kiss, a collection of nearly love 200 poems that explores the many faces and facets of Love, and Morning Coffee With God, coming out from Ozark Mountain Publishing in early 2010. Cincinnati, OH. Profile: Psychic, Spiritual Medium, Author as seen on Fox, CBS, Jerry Springer, heard on MOJO, MIX, Q-102 radio in Cincinnati, Michael Dennis offers a variety of Psychic Readings to meet your needs. He offers In-Person, Telephone and Email Readings. To order his books or to book a Psychic Reading please contact him directly. Please visit his website at www.mikethepsychic.com for more information or email him at firstname.lastname@example.org