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Ever Changing Me

Updated on February 21, 2012
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Ever Changing Me

By Tony DeLorger © 2011

Have you ever looked in the mirror and not recognised yourself? As we get older, at least for me, it is a common event. Time doesn’t fly, it dissipates in a blink and often we wonder what happened. My image is an enigma, a puzzle I have always tried to solve. My perceptions of myself are no doubt in flux, so I therefore recognise differences and therefore question what has happened.

I believe we are born with a soul or essence that is sound and cannot be destroyed. But in life we gather layers, born of experience and learning from our role models, creating a moral compass and eventually a paradigm on which to base our lives. Sometimes changes are not obvious and are often seen in moments of clarity, looking in a mirror or realising something we have done.

We change sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly and to the point of being overwhelmed and needing rest to re-establish balance. I have always embraced change as I know it offers by nature new horizons with unexpected opportunities. Often there is pain as a consequence, but I believe the result is always worth the effort.

You’ve no doubt heard the expression ‘finding yourself’, and in a way I believe that we never stop finding ourselves, because in truth we keep creating ourselves. We are a work in progress. We take aspects of our essence and add layer on layer, either expanding or suppressing as we set up the boundaries of our life model. We are always the same person, but how we express ourselves and present can evolve often dramatically. When we run into people we haven’t seen for some time, they can appear different, not the people we once knew. That is often the case, as are we, constantly growing, learning and changing.

My image can be unrecognisable because I choose to flow with life’s opportunities and change as I see appropriate. In that quest, I often find it difficult to see who I am from what I see. Age creeps up on you and one disadvantage is the mind is willing but the body is not. I still think I can do physical activities that I was doing in my twenties; I quickly discover I cannot. Bummer! But age also offers experience that can afford wisdom and perhaps avoiding much of the calamity of youthful ignorance.

I guess I must embrace the me that is my fundamental core, my essence. I think I still retain my exuberance for life, if not a little more sedentary in execution, and I feel the same, with just a bit more understanding. In the end I’m happy with that, but there are times when that person who looks back at me in the mirror, seems unrelated, disconnected in some way. I stand there looking for that clarity of recognition and after awhile I’ll find it. I’ll look at my features and realise that my youthful, clear-skinned glow has been replaced with wrinkles, puffy eyes and a general dulling of vitality.

But I still have a twinkle in my eye, and a cheek to match. Perhaps that is my saving grace.


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    • Tony DeLorger profile imageAUTHOR

      Tony DeLorger 

      7 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      Thanks DimitriLive. I thinks its more our perceptions that change but it's a strange experience. Thanks for your comment.

    • Tony DeLorger profile imageAUTHOR

      Tony DeLorger 

      7 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      You and me both Brenda, but there is a self-confidence and ease about getting older and perhaps gaining some wisdom. thanks for reading.

    • DimitriLive profile image


      7 years ago from Dallas, Texas

      Great hub and very interesting!

      I totally get what you are saying. Just thinking...I'm often called a Chameleon, and I laugh, because people, looking at the ME captured in photos, always comment that I never look like the same person. I started doing self portraits and have found it to be really uncanny, mySELF.

    • Brenda Holstine profile image

      Brenda Holstine 

      7 years ago from Denton, Texas

      Great Hub, Tony. I face this every day and wonder "what happened?" I think I prefer wisdom and experience over youth and stupidity, but I do miss that youthful vitality.

    • Tony DeLorger profile imageAUTHOR

      Tony DeLorger 

      7 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      As I have come to understand, your thoughts a mirror of mine. Thanks for reading and your comment Gary. Take care.

    • qlcoach profile image

      Gary Eby 

      7 years ago from Cave Junction, Oregon

      Wow. You rock, my friend. What is the essence of life you ask? I believe the body changes but the soul remains free. Aging can be pretty scary. But maybe the real life journey is all about how to become more spiritual rather than material. That's why I think there are infinite rainbow-colors of Light within us and all around us. With this belief, fear vanishes and peace of mind grows in its place. Peace and Light...Gary


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