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Full Circle- my overnight success

Updated on March 14, 2012

Full Circle

By Tony DeLorger © 2011

It was many years ago I realised I was different. Even as a child I struggle with place, feeling between two different paradigms: one a child wanting to please, to conform and the other wanting the freedom of self-expression and to be unencumbered by the limits of convention. That feeling of displacement has always followed my life and it is only now in my fifties, that I have accepted my uniqueness as a positive.

I realised after much pain and self-denial, that what I first saw as failure was more about being in the wrong place at the wrong time and not understanding a purposeful direction. Being true to oneself is probably the most important aspect of life, given that most people don’t know what they are supposed to be doing with their life. I’m not talking about getting married, having children and life in a broader sense, but individually what is the source of your drive and what gives you personal fulfilment.

For me it has always been creative expression and although throughout my career I have engaged the arts directly and indirectly I had never qualified why and been honest about what I am and wanted out of life. My journey of self-realisation has been fraught with disasters and harsh lessons from denying the truth. Life can often be a struggle between what we are conditioned to believe and we what presents itself. This inner contention has been a merciless mistress and caused me much strife. It is the reason I have spent so much time and energy in undoing outmoded conditioning, thoughts and assumptions that have caused limits and unnecessary burdens.

In the end, and after years of uncovering the many layers of denial and conditioned beliefs, I have come to terms with whom I am and what I should be doing regardless of any other considerations. Exposing oneself in such a way is frightening and with less consideration to the fundamental necessities of living it is not easy. But accepting one’s essence and ultimate purpose is far more rewarding than any other form of living, including all the aspirations that most people deem important. When money, acquisition and the mundane and superficial aspects of life become minor, the connection to creativity and attainment become threefold, allowing unencumbered movement.

Because of my determinations I have opened doors to many new ventures in love and life, with which I am confident will manifest in positive ways. Regardless of that I remain entwined in my understanding of me and allowing myself to realise my potential by clearing away the ineptitudes of my past. This I know will be fruitful in all the right areas.

Self-realisation is an important step to attainment and contentment, a path uninhibited by the deadwood of one’s life. Freedom can only be gained by dealing with those pieces of refuse that clutter our thoughts and pathways. It is a long and arduous task but a necessary one to find fulfilment and contentment in life.


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    • Tony DeLorger profile image

      Tony DeLorger 6 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      You are very kind Asma. I'm glad you appreciate my words. Thank you as always for reading and taking time to comment. It is always appreciated.

    • asmaiftikhar profile image

      asmaiftikhar 6 years ago from Pakistan

      i dont hav words that is beautiful piece of writing of your beautiful mind.keep writing like this

    • Tony DeLorger profile image

      Tony DeLorger 6 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      Glad you relate and find meaning in my words A M Lehrer. Writing is a such a cathartic process and readers get the same benefit the writer does. Connection is a bonus. Thanks for reading.

    • A M Lehrer profile image

      A M Lehrer 6 years ago from Southern United States

      That is awesome you have found this - everything you went through in life has led you to it. You have written that so beautifully. I am in the throws of this myself and trying to determine the route I should take.

    • Tony DeLorger profile image

      Tony DeLorger 6 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      Thanks Phil, that's quite a compliment. I appreciate it.

      Thanks Mr Happy, I'm glad you connect to my thoughts.

    • Mr. Happy profile image

      Mr. Happy 6 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      I love water-lilies!!

      You're a wise man Mr. Tony. Thank you for writing this. I do wish everyone could step back and question their existence as you do.

      All the very best Sir!

    • Phil Plasma profile image

      Phil Plasma 6 years ago from Montreal, Quebec

      I can only hope to gain such a level of self-understanding, and a wish that more people could do so.