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What Does Your Body Language Say About You?

Updated on December 3, 2015

An ex-FBI agent has created a guide to speed reading people and their body language. Take a peek at what excellent info Amazon offers

Body language consists of all sorts of things. Eye contact, body posture and so many other things never considered. Take a peek at what it says and doesn't say

You are taught to improve yourself to make a better you. Do a makeover to perk up your hair, eat better to advance the health of the body and learn new words to expand a personal vocabulary. While making improvements to the overall self, there is also an opportunity to adjust body language which strengthens communication and life overall in so many ways. This is a great opportunity scores of folks miss out on when deciding to do an overall personal upgrade. There is the distinct possibility the difference is just short of amazing.

What about body language?

Body language says so much without saying anything at all. By cultivating and refining it we enrich our lives in many ways when connecting with others. This is seen in all interactions with all sorts of people who cross out paths everyday. Improved body language helps in a positive manner in a variety of situations. More positive exchanges with a spouse, coworkers, a boss, children and even strangers in day to day life are possible.

What we say is not always what someone else hears

What the body reveals differs depending upon who you are talking to and what the conversation is about. For example, when speaking to the boss it is entirely different than when talking to your sister. What the body says isn’t for you, it’s for others.

Everyone knows what they mean and what they want to say. The question is whether or not it gets across in the manner in which it was intended. Was the communication clear and concise? Most folks are surprised to find out it is not always received as anticipated.

Why not?

Did you know 93% of a person's verbal communication is body language and only 7% is actual spoken words? Tone possibly contributes a great deal in an exchange but what another person sees when we move says more. This information is a resource shared by a reknowned scientist studying the subject. Dr. Albert Mehrabian Professor of psychology at UCLA reveals these facts..

How to fix it

In order to make changes, become aware of how you move while speaking. View a video of yourself as a great resource. Everyone typically has home movies which make a great learning tool. If not make one simply talking or discussing a any sort of topic. Watch how you move. What do you convey? If it isn’t what you want change it to make it more positive.

Our face and hands communicate many things with body language.
Our face and hands communicate many things with body language. | Source
Even when part of a group one person speaking and another one moving means having two different conversations.
Even when part of a group one person speaking and another one moving means having two different conversations. | Source

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Small gestures are able to say big things

How to make changes

Tons of things are manipulating the message being sent out. These are some of the sorts of things which impact and affect what is being conveyed from one person to another via body language. Gaining a foothold on these help make a message clearer and more concise.


Emotions connect to the alignment or flow of movements.The more positive our emotions the more positive interaction or exchange is experienced. This means even on those blue days, suck it up and make it work in an optimistic force for you. Encouragement and confidence will flow into the a conversation with a upbeat emotion behind what is being said.

If you are tired and slump there is a tendency to feel even more tired and slump more. This conveys less interest in what is being discussed. Sit up straight and the body will feel noticeably less tired. Smile if you feel a little blue, this will make you feel better-guaranteed. Smiling is an uplifting experience for you psychologically. Even when talking on the phone smiling is transferred across the telephone with a more positive tone.

Did you realize the more you smile the less stress a body feels and the better overall you feel inside and out. Did you know children smile almost 200 times a day? The older we get the less do this gesture.

People who laugh more live longer according to national studies. Your body language is directly related to how one feels emotionally as well as psychology. Having these on a positive note helps you communicate better.


It is possible to increase personal charisma. Some lucky few are born with it, but everyone has a tiny bit. Work on it to make it better. Build it up to bloom out when connected with someone else.

Be a person other people enjoy being around. Have a better posture and more open body language to increase this trait. An example of a negative motion to avoid is crossing your arms in front of you as you speak. This is reflected as defensive and closed.

Speaking with hands in front and using small gesturesvs. large expansive gestures is a way for people to see this as an open person. They believe this is an individual who is easy to talk to which makes them much more likely listen to what you have to say. Leaving hands at your sides is also seen as more open.

Crossing them in front of you is always a no-no. This is a says without a doubt how closed and unapproachable this person happens to be. The tighter and higher on the chest these are intertwined the worst things are perceived to be.

Charisma is something some people are born with. Observe people that have naturally occurring charisma all around you. There may be friends or family members that possess this quality you know and spend time with. Imitate some of the gestures they use while having different types of conversations with others.

Learn from other with charisma as well

Everyone knows someone who is born with this gift. These are those few people who also have something to say which interests you. There is usually a crowd around this person and they are talking to everyone, or so it seems. The easy going guy or girl who everyone likes and likes everyone. This person draws you in before you know it.

Notice anything about their body language? How the smile, how there is a turn of the head. Is there eye contact when speaking directly to someone? Maker certain meeting their eyes conveys neither hostility nor confrontation? Where does this other person place their hands? What is the overall body language convey? Observe and learn from people that have these characteristics. Compare your body language to theirs and if you can make improvements do so.

Delivering difficult news

Ever hear the saying “don’t shoot the messenger for the message he delivers”. Having a better body language makes even saying hard or difficult things better for the person on the receiving end of things.This does not mean the emotion emitted changes from sad to happy, but it is less intense on both ends of things.

The correct body language when delivering bad or difficult news to others is conveyed by enhancing gestures which makes a person receiving the news feel better or less likely to react badly. The concept is to imply we are all sorry. We are all in this with you. I am approachable. If there is a reaction, you aid in reducing the negative reaction to it with better body language.

Imagine having to fire someone, telling someone about a difficult decision that was made that may negatively impact them. These are things that are hard to say as well as hear. Terrific body language can make the receiver of the message fell better.

The Dreaded Interview

Yes, what we do with our hands, feet and other parts of the body is important when in an interview. Your voice isn’t quivering, its nice and steady and say everything previously practiced perfectly.

Say all of the right things and give the employer what he/she is looking for. By slouching and not making eye contact you wont get the job. What is conveyed to this employer is the fact you are feel nervous and unsure of yourself. This is conveyed to inexperience and probably not a good bet, especially under pressure. (remember only 7% of you’re communication is verbal and the rest is body language). You probably wont get the job and wonder why.

Start off on the right foot and stay that way. Sending mixed messages in an interview will send it the way of the Titanic.

Make certain it to match what is being said is positive about personal dependability and self-assurance. Walk in and out of the interview with the job because of simple body language said all the right things. This is also true of promotions, raises and other items tied to employment.

First impressions

Everyone has a stereotype of someone when they meet them for the first time. A preconceived notion which comes to mind. No on is able to help it. a first impression of of any one provides you with a mental impression of that person and words are associated with them. Nice, overbearing, cordial, snotty, sweet, flaky, all of these are tied to a first impression mental image of someone you meet and describe their personality as you perceive it.

Countless times that particular picture will last. Make your first impression a better one through better body language. Bring your best body language to the table for that first impression. You never know how things or people may network. Visualize if you are looking for that better house or job and someone asks an acquaintance about you and all they have is your first impression. Don’t you want to the be one that comes to mind for referral because they remember all of the positive things about you?

Better body language will help with every communication you make in your life.

Better Body Language for Your Marriage

It is important to display the right body language at job interviews

© 2011 smcopywrite


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    • Peggy W profile image

      Peggy Woods 6 years ago from Houston, Texas

      Body language is surely one form of communication which portrays much about a person. Good and useful hub. Rating it so as well as up.

    • RTalloni profile image

      RTalloni 6 years ago from the short journey

      Neat stuff. Useful and interesting. Voted up and useful.

      Would like to link this to my Speaking English hub if you have no objection. Thanks!

    • DDS profile image

      David Sproull 6 years ago from Toronto

      Body language makes up a huge portion of our communication, so being aware of it can make you a better communicator and avoid many misunderstandings.

    • sangre profile image

      Sp Greaney 6 years ago from Ireland

      Hm, going to make sure I'm aware now of my body language. :-) Great hub...voted up...

    • Trish_M profile image

      Tricia Mason 6 years ago from The English Midlands

      Hi :)

      This is a really fascinating topic!

      Your recommendation to watch videos and check out our own body language is a really good one!

      And smiling is definitely a good thing to do.

      This hub made me smile! :)

    • Mrs. J. B. profile image

      Mrs. J. B. 6 years ago from Southern California

      That I can be a B----sad but true. I have a lot of people that told me that they thought that when they first met me. I was pre judged!

    • travel_man1971 profile image

      Ireno Alcala 6 years ago from Bicol, Philippines

      I agree with Mrs. J.B. We're always pre-judged. That first impression will only be altered if they find some good points from you. Like when I attended a wedding ceremony or judging contest, they've already put a smirk on their faces; maybe because of my balding head (LOL, we'll I'm laughing at it). But when they heard me talking infront, some still braved to renew their ties (momentarily) on me. Talk about biases..huhummnn.

    • deepthought profile image

      Deep 6 years ago from In the middle of nowhere and worldwide but still that T.O.kid from da north of America

      very interesting hub and topic smcopywrite

    • BeatsMe profile image

      BeatsMe 6 years ago

      I don't know, a lot of people don't really know how to read body language, but thanks, I'll have to try this. :)

    • heart4theword profile image

      heart4theword 6 years ago from hub

      Change your mind, change your body:) You are so write about what your body language says about us? I think first impressions, are lasting many younger people are not educated on the importance of a good first impression:)

    • Nikki D. Felder profile image

      Nikki D. Felder 5 years ago from Castle Hayne, N.C.

      I like to think I have charisma and my countenance, stance, and posture, as you said, affect my impact at being such. When I was my maddest last, everybody in the office new it! Thank you, Nikki D. Felder

    • TeaPartyCrasher profile image

      TeaPartyCrasher 5 years ago from Camp Hill, PA

      This is one that a career advisor brought up, and it's one to watch out for at interviews. Checking your watch often can be seen as a sign of disinterest.

    • Chris Achilleos profile image

      Chris Achilleos 5 years ago

      By reading other peoples body language we may understand the true feelings and emotions of people. Great hub. Voted up and sharing :)

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